


Inevitable Love

by ZaZaCobra



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Curses, Dark Past, Depression, F/M, Family, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Lots of lots of curses, Love and Loss, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Relationship(s), Romance, Sexual Assault, Sexual Content, Sexual Violence, Some Humor, Thieves Guild, Violence, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, mature content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2018-03-19 18:50:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 27
Words: 75,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3620466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZaZaCobra/pseuds/ZaZaCobra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Somehow, Maaike managed to kill Alduin, AND keep her identity (mostly) unknown while doing it. In the end she could not care about the fame she made as the Dragonborn. The fame that she could use if she wanted. But she doesn't. She want's to be just as Maaike... To find anew life. That was her reason why she came to Skyrim in the first place.</p>
<p>But there are other things in her past that wont go away. Can she truly escape it? Or forget it? </p>
<p>Maybe there will not be any "difficulties".</p>
<p>....Expect that there already is one: Brynjolf.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ah Riften...

**Author's Note:**

> So this is mostly a fanfiction about Maaike, who leaves her life behind, since Alduin is dead and she doesn't want to be Dragonborn. Skyrim doesn't know exactly who the Dragonborn is so that makes it easier for her to disappear. Even the people in Whiterun are uncertain what happened to her, or what's her real name or identity. 
> 
> That's the basic crap, since I'm not a huge fan of the main storyline and I couldn't just ignore it (for some reason) soooo.... This is the thing: You'll get some sexy Bryn for yourselves, so I hope you enjoy! 
> 
> I'd like if you leave comments on my writing, so I can improve myself.

   Riften looked different than she remembered. 

 _Well,_ Maaike thought,  _Last time, I did come here when it was oblivion-bat-shit dark-night and damn that rain!_ She had simply sneaked into the city, found Esbern, then sneaked out.  _Oh and I did kill few Thalmor soldiers on the way. No big deal._

City was now, however, very pretty. Probably because it was autumn... and the weather wasn't so bad. It was actually gorgeous looking evening. Amber and yellow colored leaves, late evening sky with the slight purple color on it.

_What could possibly go wrong now?_

"You there girl! Halt!" yelled the guard with typical nord accent.

_.....Figures._

Maaike tilted her head to the side and let few dark locks fall to her face from under the hood. "Yes?"

"Before we let you in, you must pay the visitors tax!" he demanded. 

"Reeaally? What is it for?" Maaike asked with clearly amused tone.

"For the privilege to enter the city! What does it matter?".

Maaike snorted a bit.  _You've got to be kidding me!_   She wasn't going to waste her time on this!

"Look  _handsome "_ she said voice thick with sarcasm, since the guard was wearing a helmet what covered his whole face, "this is clearly a  shakedown.You are not fooling anybody." _  
_

"Okay okay! Keep it down! Do you want everybody to hear you!? Just get in. I'll just open it... There you go! Welcome to Riften traveler". 

 _Yeah I feel so welcome here._ She shook her head and entered the city. Once inside, she took off her hood and let her long, straight, ebony black hair fall to her back. It was bit of a mess after all the walking. No matter. It still was much more relaxing than hunting all the  _fucking_  dragons. Well that was the reason why she was here. To build a new life... and to escape the last one. That's why she came to Skyrim. But then...

Maaike was the Dragonborn. But her destiny was done. Alduin was dead, so she had fulfilled her job as the Dragonborn. After losing a year of her life, she can start what she came to do in Skyrim.  _Finally!_ _  
_

The city was very beautiful. More beautiful than Whiterun. Or at least that was Maaikes opinion. She just decided to get a little tour here. Nobody knew her, and even the people of other holds didn't know her true identity...  _or whatever. Just let it be._ She just started walking.

"I don't know you, are you in Riften looking for trouble?" said a very displeased and dark voiced man.

"Oh for f.... really?!"  _How many times are they going to interrupt me???_   She turned to look the person who just talked and then her eyes widened little bit. "Oh". 

_Well isn't he just big?_

"Last thing Black-Briars need is some idiot meddling in their businesses." He said and tried to be more threatening. _  
_

"Look, I'll say this  **once:** I am not looking for trouble. I am not going to cause trouble. I will not mess around with Black-Briars" she did know who they are, "and if you let me be, you won't even notice I am here. Is that clear enough for you tough guy?". Her voice steady, cold and fearsome. But her stare was worse than Skyrim's winter.

The man looked at her for a moment. He didn't fear her. Didn't even show any kind of emotion. "Good. You seem brighter than some" he said finally. _  
_

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"I'm Maul. You need dirt on someone, I'm your guy" he said with little flirtation in his voice.

Generally, she wasn't the one for relationships. But little flirting wouldn't hurt anyone now would it? So she just let it be. "Dirt huh? I'm not exactly.... clean myself."

"Now you are speaking my language".

 

***

 

After talking to Maul, she went to Bee and Barb to get a drink. She had learned many things. About the Thieves guild, Maven Black-Briar and so forth. Apparently, if she wanted in that sort of action, she should go and speak to someone called Brynjolf.  _Perhaps I will._

She had done this kind of work before but... No she wasn't going to think about it. It wasn't worth it. _Just._   _Let. It. Be._  She drank down the bottle of Black-Briar mead. It was pretty good. Not excellent, like back in Cyrodill but it did have it's own kick. If possible, she liked this even better.  _Perhaps I am more nord than I thought._

Oh she was a Nord alright. But also Imperial, and Breton, and perhaps she had little Redguard in her blood too. In short: She was from mixed bloods. It was just easier to say she was a Nord. People believed it. Perhaps it was her accent? Her fair skin? Her strong frame? Or her icy blue eyes?  _Bad example. Many have that eye color. Not just the Nords._

 _Well at least it's not my height since I'm just little bit longer than most Bretons._ She'd kill anyone who would call her "shorty". Again. She was so lost in thoughts that she didn't notice someone walking behind her seat. The voice made her jump.

"Never done honest work for all that coin you're carrying, eh lass?" Said a man with low whisper.

_Oh my...._


	2. Business offer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike gets an interesting offer...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of this chapter has been written from Brynjolfs point-of-view. Yeay! We get him now :3!

Sapphire had gotten into little trouble. Why of course. She made a little big scene, but lucky for them it remained a secret.  _Lucky indeed,_ Brynjolf thought and sighed.  _Damn it._ He was worried enough about the business, and he didn't have the energy or interest to... to... take care of some shitty little things. Guild use to be better than this. Perhaps... No. Others are wrong. There are a lot to be done, and he wasn't going to give up. No way in no hell.

_For now, I'll just need to wait for an opportunity to...._

He was just sitting there, on his regular table, when the door opened. He didn't know why, just some instinct told him to look. He almost choked on his drink, and it took all his willpower not to make a low whistle. Not before he had examined this person more closely....

 _Well well... What have we here?_  Brynjold smirked wickedly. 

Long, straight (if messy) ebony black hair. Strong, capable looking body and frame, yet not clumsy or too much muscle. Actually she looked like she was quick on her feet. Brynjolf thanked the Divines for her tight leather armor. It really showed top of her breasts and little bit of her legs... Smooth, soft and fair/pale skin. Perfect and round buttocks...  _Very... intriguing...._

_And damn sexy._

Yet it was her face that caught his attention (normally he'd just be happy to glance at the breasts and occasionally bedding the woman in process). High cheekbones, full but not chubby. Her face was actually quite the opposite to chubby. Lips were full yet not so big.  _Is that... violet?_ he thought and looked at the color of her lips. They were something between violet and red... dark and cool. Sharp nose.  _Uncommon for a Nord._ Even the scar on her faces right side, made her look more.... beautiful. It started from the top of eye, went down, crossed the eye, the cheekbones and then it ended on her lips, touching them a bit. 

Her eyes, however, were the main treasure of her features though: Light, icy (bit snowy) blue.. There was even little bit silver color. Long eyelashes, harsh black eyeliner and dark but not pompous looking eyebrows. Neutral looking woman. Definitely not some classic beauty... She was unique kind of temptress. She must be a mystery for some. 

But not for him.

Sure, he couldn't see THROUGH her.. but there were signs on her. The way she walked, the way she looked... Woman wasn't just here for some vacation. She obviously meant business.

 _Just what we need,_ Brynjolf thought. He watched her sit down near the counter, on the free table. Her back was on him.  _This is my_ _opportunity._ He sized her up and down for one last time and got up.  He walked behind her and leaned near her ear and whispered:

 "Never done honest work for all that coin you're carrying, eh lass?" he said with his low and sexy voice.

 

* * *

 

Maaike looked the man, now standing in front of her (since she had turned around).  _Nord, redhead, greenish blue eyes like the water in the sea... Wow he is BIG. Not like Maul but still._

_....That sounded SO wrong._

He was pleasant to look at... Attractive to be more specific, but that grin.... It made her feel uneasy. Even though it was... wicked and strong. Warm even, in it's own way. But that was the problem. 

 _He wants something of me. I.... should be careful._ She was trying to rid her mind of his handsome face, but it was... 

_Very... intriguing.... Just.... Let it be._

And she did. When she realized how close he was.

She cleared her voice. "Pardon me?"  _Yeah... Well aren't I just a good-fucking-mannered lady?_

Brynjolf smiled. "Your pockets. They are full of money. I can tell. I bet you didn't earn any of it... honestly".

"I missed the part where that was any of your god-damned business...  _sir..._ " she said with obvious mockery.  _Good-mannered my ass!_

 "Oh that's where you're wrong lass. Wealth is my business. Maybe you'd like a ..... taste?" he restored with amusement.

"Alright. You have me peaked my interest. What do you have in mind?".

"Oh we'll see. I might have some job for you. Come to see me in the marked place tomorrow. I'll work a scene there and well... You'll see then. For now though..."

She frowned. "What?"

"I should buy you a drink. If we are going to work together... It wouldn't hurt to know more about you lass" he said with a deep voice.

Maaike felt uncomfortable. Even though he was soothing kind of guy (or at least she hoped). This isn't why she is here!  _I.. just can't._ Memories rolled in her head. She started feel nauseous. 

"Lass?" Brynjolf asked, now having a frown of his own.

Maaike jumped a bit.  _How long was I silent?_  "Look, I'm here for a job. Not a social call. And if you want to bed someone, go find a wench why don't ya? I'm not an option"  _never mix business and pleasure..... At least not in that manner._  

Sudden grin found his face.  _What's with him?_ Then he started to chuckle.  _What the hell?_  

"No need to get irritated lass. I'll be a perfect gentleman so no worries. I get your message. However......" he added and leaned closer with sudden seriousness.

"However...?" she swallowed.

"I'm not sure, if _you_ get my message".

"Uh.. what?" she felt more and more uncomfortable.  _Damn Dibellas ass! When did I turn into a babbling teenager._

With even _more_ deepness in his voice, he continued:

"I am here for business, and business always means coin. That's my heart and code. Knowing your people is part of knowing your business. And knowing your business... Would make things smoother, more trustworthy. You get my meaning?" he asked with serious tone.

Maaike felt more relaxed.  _Just business... I can deal with that._ "Alright. That makes sense."  _  
_

 

 Brynjolf smiled and sat to the chair opposite to her, around the table. "Let us start with introductions: I'm Brynjolf." He said his name with thicker accent. She found herself enjoying his voice.

_Perhaps... he is okay after all._

"I'm Maaike".

 


	3. Reminder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike is reminded about a traumatic experience....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING! Trigger, involves rape scene.... If you are sensitive for this kind of stuff, please do not read.

_Darkness. Always the darkness of that stone manor...._

_He dragged her with him. Up stairs... Towards his bedroom. Maaike tried to struggle and scream but the poisons she had been fed, had made her weak and vulnerable like a new born kitten. Only voices that came out of her mouth were whimpers._

_He kicked the door open, pushed her harshly into the room, so that she'd fall to the ground. Then he slammed the door closed._

_"N...no.. Stop this!" she said, voice shaking. She wasn't going to beg! No, never! Even with her friends down there she.... she...._

_"You are not the fucking leader in here, you fucking bitch! No, you are a whore. And you are mine" he yelled... That awful grip on her arm when he grabbed her and  yanked her onto the bed._

_She lost her pride and her dignity as well as her fearsome coolness when she finally begged: "NO!! Please don't hurt my friends... Let me go I don't want this... Please... I beg you to-"_

_He didn't let her finish when he punched her to the side of her lips... She tasted the blood. "Whores like you can only do one thing... Beg. Serves you right my dirty little whore... MINE. Heh..." he chuckled at the thought. He adjusted her on the bed: Maaike was lying on her back in the middle of the bed now completely on it.... Almost paralyzed she still attempted to struggle. Then he straddled her. Looking down own her with obvious lust in his eyes._

_She knew he wasn't going to back down, so Maaike decided to gain more dignity. When his face was coming closer to her face, she spitted blood at his eyes and succeeded._

_"Fuck you, you sadistic miserable old cock! I'll kill you...!" She growled._

_He wiped his face with his sleeve. Then grinned. "I'll show you, since you so much want it you slut. I'll fuck you until you bleed. I'll fuck you blue. I'll rape you and ruin you so bad that no other man will want to touch you. Ever"_

_She was now shaking. His hands sneaked to the front of her tunic._

_"You know whore, I tried to be patient with you. I tried to wait that you'd leave that fucking weakling of a boyfriend you had. But since you couldn't even show respect to your betters... You shall get the treatment you deserve". With that he ripped her tunic apart. Her breasts bounced out of it. He was disgustingly happy that she didn't have any breastband on her._

_He tore off last of the tunic and threw it onto the floor. Then he tore off her trousers and undergarment. Soon those were on the floor too._

_"Well well... Would you look at that.."  he said and looked at her naked body. "You are exactly what a slut should look like." He grabbed her breasts violently and started groping them. She didn't struggle. She had no strength withing her._

_Am I this weak?_

_She could hear the screaming of her friends... even though they were down stairs. But her mind wasn't on that painful voice... It was in this moment._

_He bit on her nipples, and making them bleed few drops of blood. Painful whimpers came out of her mouth. His hand traveled up and down her body, touching every part of her... then they landed between her thighs._

_"How does it feel, you gonna get wet?" the disgusting man asked and pushed a finger inside of her. Harshly. Maaike screamed now. "Oh honey this is just the beginning" he said and pushed a second finger into her, pushing in and out, pace increasing. His thumb was on her clit but it didn't help. He meant it to hurt. And he succeeded._

_Eventually her body did give in a little bit. The movement of his fingers did painfully make her folds wet._

_"You like it whore. You enjoy the pain!" He laughed and took his fingers out of her and fished his cock out of his pants._

_"No, oh no please don't!!!" she pleaded, tears of desperation flowing from her eyes._

_Going between her legs, pushing her thighs open with his knee and watching her, positioning himself, he pressed the head of his hard cock at her entrance. "Yes... Struggle. It will make this much more pleasurable...For me of course" he grinned and pushed in without mercy. Thrusting began right away._

_Her body wasn't ready enough for this! He was unforgiving with his movement. Hard and fast immediately from the start._

_"Aahh fuck...! Oh yes you feel so good inside my whore..." he said and when deeper with each thrust. She wasn't a virgin but this tore her from inside and blood came out, easing the process a little but not enough. She could feel him inside of her, all the painful thrusts..._

_He did it for his own pleasure. Raping her, fucking her, HURTING her.... She cried and cried and cried. Whimper after whimper. He just grunted and panted with is thrust. He was completely inside of her._

_He forced his tongue on her throat. He licked the place where he had punched her. Then bit it, increasing the pain._

_Then the greatest pain happened to her. The warmth in her stomach was growing. She was coming. Maaike felt disgusting and pained. He is hurting me! How can this happen!_

_Noticing this, he increased his pace, his thumb on her clit once more. He took her legs on his shoulder allowing him to go even further. Her screaming, and the screaming of her friends down stairs, was now clearly to be heard._

_Then she came. She closed her eyes, pretending not to be there. This disgusting man... this.. monster... Pounded into her even faster when he felt her milks._

_"Ah yes, fuck yes... more... Ah shit!" he yelled with a final thrust and released his seed deep inside of her._

_This man... This disgusting monster she would never forget..._

_Ulmer...._

 

_***_

 

Maaike woke up, jumping up from her bed. She was panting with lots of sweat. "Shit."

Last night had been pleasant. Brynjolf and Maaike had discussed the "activities" of his profession. She got all nostalgic and then told about her own jobs in Cyrodill. He tried to ask more but she avoided the topic.

  _No reason to tell  him about some old incidents...._ The stories she told, were all true. Her career as a mercenary and occasional thief or bounty hunter, her experience, that she worked mostly alone now that she was in Skyrim. She however didn't tell anything about the whole Dragonborn thing. It was done. No need to live with it anymore.

Brynjolf was stubborn yet not stupid. She hoped he hadn't noticed her... evasive attitude about some topics. No matter. Her personal things were for her alone. Things that might have an effect to the business, were more important.

Somehow, all this memorizing got her thinking about her past. When she got to sleeping, she had this nightmare. It felt so real... Like she was reliving the rape that happened to her.

_Why am I thinking about this? It happened so long time ago...._

_Let. It. Be. Your friends are gone, he is dead or he thinks that you are dead, no reason to .... Just let it go._ That's what Maaike always kept telling herself. 

Hopefully... Brynjolf could also let it be.

She wanted peace.

A new life.

Now.

 

***

 

It's been a while since he had seen such precise work. He just started the distraction at his stall, selling fake potions to idiots. Maaike's job was to steal Madesi's golden ring and then put it in Bran-Shei's pocket. 

It only took a few minutes. And the done. No one noticed and she just nodded and he stopped his distraction after a little while, so it wouldn't look too weird. Not that it would matter.  _These idiots would never guess what just happened._ But as much as he liked danger, some assurance wouldn't hurt.

"Well well lass. You did it. I knew there was something about you" Brynjolf said and looked her up and down. 

For some reason Maaike wasn't like yesterday, when they talked while drinking black-briar mead. Sure she had obviously avoided some topics but she had certain energy to her. Now she seemed... Tired. Even after he gave her the payment, her demeanour didn't change much. 

"Yeah sure. Coin is always good" she just retorted. 

"There is more where that came from lass" he winked and continued "now that you've gotten a taste, maybe you'd like a.... permanent agreement in our organization. We could use people like you".

She rubbed the back of her neck. Feeling little bit uncomfortable. Or .... blushing? Well that would be something.

"Well if there is money in it, sure. What do you need me to do Bryn?" 

 _She already gave me a nickname. Things are definitely looking better now._ He grinned. Maaike was indeed feeling better. He wasn't sure why.

Brynjolf told her to go through the ratways. There she would find him in the Ragged Flagon. If she survived travel... She indeed would be on his good list.

However, for reason he didn't know, he truly hoped he'd see her again.

"Alright, I'll see you there Bryn." She was about to leave but he grabbed her hand gently and kissed her knuckles softly. She just looked at him. Her eyes didn't even widen. Yes, he totally liked her. Her coolness yet energy were... refreshing.

"Indeed, lass" Bryn smiled and watched Maaike leave.

He hadn't noticed her now obvious blushing.

 

***

 

Maaike stabbed one of the thugs of the ratway right to the eyeball. She watched as the blood spilled out.  _And that's how you get you mind of things!_ _  
_

She didn't understand what was with her. The moment Bryn had touched her, she felt stiff but at the same time butterflies in her stomach. Maybe, just maybe she could have handle it better, or she would have punched the man... If she hadn't seen that stupid dream.

Before that time, she did have casual sex. For pleasure. Then she fell in love. She lost it all.

And that stupid dream reminded her about the reason, why this is so. 

 _Well shit. Fuck it all. I should not care about shit like this._ Well maybe she wouldn't, but she did blush. That made Maaike confused. 

_...Just let it be... And kill some assholes._

With that she used magic to pull some things insides out of his stomach.

_And that's how it's done!_


	4. "Professional" viewpoint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She gets to the Ragged Flagon, where Brynjolf gives her the "test" that assures her passage to the Thieves Guild. However the other members question his motives.
> 
> And then it's time to meet the leader of the Thieves Guild. That doesen't go as smoothly as Maaike wishes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, sorry this took little bit longer. I have been middle of my studies, and they are killing me, plus my internet hasn't been working. However, here is some Maaike x Bryn for you :)

".....I'm telling you, this one's different."

Maaike just came to the Ragged Flagon.  _He better mean, that I'm different in a good way. Otherwise I know who is getting a black eye._

"We've all heard that one before Bryn! Quit kidding yourself" said another low voiced imperial. The voice reminded Maaike of Maul.  _Maul! Of course, he mentioned that his brother worked for the guild! His name was.... Dirge, yes, that's correct._

"It's time to face the truth, old friend. You, Vex, Mercer... you're all part of a dying breed. Things are changing!" said the bartender of this underground layer. 

"Dying breed eh? Just wait until you see this one. And let me tell you: She is one nice piece of-"

"AHEM" interrupted Maaike. She didn't want to know what Brynjolf was going to say.  _So much for being professional._ "As much as I'd love to hear what you think of me, I'm here for business. So lets get this over with, shall we?"

Maaike had to give Brynjolf some credit: He didn't even flinch, no blushes or embarrassment. Just stood there with is usual and confident grin. Unlike the other men in the present, he seemed quite normal. His buddies had their eyes widened and mouths opened. WIDELY. She had to fight the urge to laugh at them, since their faces were so priceless. 

"Well well. Color me impressed lass. Wasn't certain if I'd ever see you again" he said taking few steps closer, "but I'm glad you came" he added softly. Meanwhile the other men gave them some privacy.

 _Yeah I bet you are._ "Yes, well, coming here was pretty easy actually."

Now he got his wicked grin: "Beautiful, reliable AND headstrong? You are turning out to be quite the prize!"

"....That your professional viewpoint?" she asked, weird heat raising up on her neck.

"Of course lass. Always professional... in public".

"Wait, I am singing up for the Thieves guild, not some weird prostitution organization, right?" she asked jokingly.  _How can I joke about something like that!? He is sounding pretty suspicious already. Just fucking great, I am encouraging him!_

This comment got Brynjolf laughing but he didn't comment on it. He just continued on the main topic: Giving her a job.

"Anyway, now that we've whetted your appetite with our little scheme at the marked, how about handling a few deadbeats for me?"

"Alright. Tell me more."

Brynjolf told Maaike about three people, who hadn't paid their debts and refused to pay anyways. She was supposed to collect and if they still pay up, she'd had to find more creative way to send a message. Killing was out of the question. Which was good for Maaike: She wasn't a fan of assassination, even though she had done it in the past. _Bad memories. Always pay your debts..._

 Brynjolf gave her list of the people: Keerava, Bersi Honey-Hand and Haelga. If she succeeds, she will be given a permanent place on their organization. _  
_

"Alright, go there, send a message, get the money and come here. Consider it done. But.. Will I get a cut?" she asked, just to be sure.

"Of course you'll get a cut. We take care of our own. Now, if you need anymore details, I'll be here. Otherwise, get going."

_Good. Professional when needed._

"Not that I'm trying to get rid of you" he winked.

_....OR not._

Maaike rolled her eyes, turned around and left. Not even bothering to ask any details about the marks.  _I'll figure it out on my own._

 

 

Brynjolf watched her go. Confident and... _well damn, she is a real woman._  He realized that the scar on her face, didn't just add character, it was truly part of her.  _Starts on top of her eye... Ends on the top of her beautiful lips. Deep and long. Represents her strength and so much more. Such eloquent, unique and-_

"For goddamn' sake Bryn! Did ya lose your ear earlier than me? And people call me an old arse" growled Delvin.

Then Brynjolf realized that he just had been standing there, looking where Maaike had left. Deep in his thoughts, he hadn't realized that Delvin had been trying to talk to him.

"Well, Delv. Perhaps you just are getting too tiny for me to notice, eh?" he added bit distraught. 

"Or perhaps somethin' else is gettin' too big for ya, so you can't notice anythin' else, am I right?" 

"Oh is that so? Care to enlighten me of this distracting thing?" 

Delvin chuckled a bit, with his own deep voice. He also had watched this new whelp leaving this rat hole. Delvin turned to Vekel. "You REALLY think, that good ol' Bryn here, hired this striking lass for professional reasons only?"

"Doubt it" Vekel retorted. 

Bryn snorted. "I assure you old man, lass has her talents. Wouldn't bother with her otherwise."

"Sure sure, but what kind of talents you speakin' of? I saw that fine piece of arse too, Bryn. Don't mistake me for being blind ol' man."

"....yet" added Vekel.

"Very funny."

Brynjolf chuckled a bit for this exchange between Vekel and Delvin. After that he simply added:

"When you are on top of the mountain, very high, might as well admire the sights, don't you think?"

Other two men went quiet. Then they looked at each other.

"Totally professional?" Delv asked.

"Nope" Vekel noted.

"Shut it." Bryn finished.

 

 

 

***

 

 

The job was simple enough. Haelga was obviously a devoted follower of Dibella (she did have Goddesses's amulet and statue) so it was easy enough to steal something important to her and then blackmail.

Then there was the stubborn Argonian woman Keerava. Maaike hated the fact, that Keerava's weak point was her family. She found the blackmailing in this case very disgusting: If Keerava didn't pay up, they would pay her family a visit.  _That just.... wrong._ After what happened to Maaike's own family, she hated mixing other people's families into... well... into shit like this. Luckily Keerava paid immediately after this threat.

Bersi was the last one. He was the easiest one. Apparently Maaike had send so strong message, that he had already heard what might happen if someone won't pay up. So he simply gave the money to her.

_Done! Now to Bryn!_

It was weird, really. She was actually glad to go back to him. In all her time in Skyrim, all the men who attempted to flirt with her were shut down by her stare, or by her fist. But with Brynjolf, it seemed to be more... playful. Not serious. She kinda missed that. Ever since her friends died  _(thinking about it hurts)_ she didn't think she might be doing this kinda thing again.

Perhaps she truly is moving on.

_By Dibella! I'm thinking too much. Let us see, what happens._

Maaike went back  to Ragged Flagon. Brynjolf was sitting near the barkeep. She went next to him, tapping him lightly on the shoulder. He turned to look at her clearly waken up from his thoughts. Smile crossed his face.

"So, the job's done and you brought the gold. Best of all you did it clean. I like that. Dumping bodies and keeping the guard quiet can be expensive. Bad for business. But you get the idea."

"Yes, of course Bryn. Look, here is the coin they owned us." Maaike said and handed the coin to him.

Brynjolf smirked. "Yes. Us." That made her blush a little. He took the money, and looked at it for a second. Then he looked at her. "Well done. And it would seem I owe you something in return. Here you go. I'm sure you'll find these quite usefull" he said and now it was his turn to give her coin and some potions.

_Wow, this job really pays well._

"So, what's next?"

"You truly have proven yourself. We need people like you in our outfit. What do you say?" he asked, maybe bit too eagerly. 

"If there is more coin where that came from, I'm in." She said, more eagerly than Bryn himself had.

That made him very happy. Even she was amazed of her sudden change of attitude. She seemed more comfortable."That's the spirit! You truly have skill to back up your talk and that's how you earn your pay. Roots for a professional thief. I think you'll more than fit in around here."

That took all doubt out of Maaike. She didn't question Brynjolf's motivation for recruiting her any longer.  _He is not like most men, huh. In many different ways._

She nodded. However, there was something else she wished to know. "Bryn, may I ask you something?"

"Sure. What's on your mind?"

"The guild isn't doing very well, or that's what people keep saying. Is that true?"

Bryn expression wasn't playful anymore. "We've run into rough patch lately, but it's nothing to be concerned about."

Maaike quipped her eyebrow at that.

"Tell you what. You keep making us coin and I'll worry about everything else" he continued.

"Fair enough" she shrugged.

"Now, if there are no more questions, how about following me and I'll show what we are all about."

This made Maaike bit nervous, but for some reason she trusted Brynjolf. "I'll follow your lead".

 

Brynjolf smiled and then stood up. He walked away from the barkeep, to a storage cabinet. He opened it.  _We are not going into a closet, are we? I hope not!_ Then he opened a secret door that led into a completely new hall.  _Oh! Well that's convenient._

She followed him through the hall, to a new door. From there it lead to a new whole room. Very huge room. Cistern. There were other members and beds for them. Also some kind of living quarters and hallways that led probably to some kind of storage rooms.

Then, the man caught her eye. Man, at the middle of the cistern. She was pretty good with her stare but... the man gave her the creeps.  _He reminds me of..._ She shook her head.  _Not going to think about him again._ She swallowed and followed Brynjolf to meet this man. He wasn't as tall as Bryn but obviously taller than "regular" men. Dirty hair and angry looking face.

_Well isn't this just fucking wonderful?_

When she came closer, the man looked her up and down. Maaike didn't like that look. She didn't know that look, but she knew what it reminded her of. It made her feel even more uncomfortable. If it was even possible. 

_He must be the leader._

"Mercer, this is the one I was talking about.... our new recruit". Even Brynjolf felt unease. That didn't help at all.

"This better not be another waste of Guild's resources Brynjolf" he growled with hoarse voice. "Before we continue I want to make one thing perfectly clear. If you play by the rules, you walk away rich. You break the rules and you lose your share. No debates, no discussions... You do what we say, when we say. Do I make myself clear?"

 _Yep, I totally hate him._ But Maaike did understand business.

"Yes, I understand."

"Good, then I think it's time to put your expertise to the test" Mercer Frey continued.

This made Brynjolf quip his eyebrows. "Wait... You aren't talking about the Goldenglow, are you? Even our little Vex couldn't get in!"

Mercer didn't care about Brynjolf's protests. "You claim this recruit possesses aptitude to our line of work. So let her prove it. Goldenglow Estate is critically to on of our largest clients. But the owner shut us out. He needs to be taught a lesson. Brynjolf will give you the details."

"Ahem. Mercer, aren't you forgetting something?" Brynjolf asked.

"Hmm? Oh yes. Since Brynjolf assures you'll be nothing but a benefit to us, then you're in. Welcome to the Thieves Guild." with that, he took his leave. 

_Good riddance._

"Welcome to the family lass! We are expecting you to make lot of coin to us, so don't disappoint me." He said with his usual relaxing tone.

"Of course I won't disappoint you Bryn. Not my style. However, I'd like to know more about this... family business so I can get started." Maaike said. A lot had happened today. She didn't want to miss anything important.

"Sure. Why don't we discuss that at the Ragged Flagon? I'll buy you a drink, fill you in with the most important details about our little family, and rest of the things we'll discuss tomorrow. It's been a long day. You deserve some rest."

Maaike wasn't so intrigued about the Goldenglow job. She was too exhausted. So when Brynjolf offered to help her settle in, find out about how things really work around here and leave the official business for later, she was relieved. 

"That sounds wonderful Bryn. But as long as you are buying the drinks..." she smirked.

_Yeah... I could get used to this._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would appreciate feedback, since I am always willing to improve myself :)


	5. First story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike is taking time to know her fellow thieves. And getting closer to her own past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to take so long! (studies) Mainly talk with Bryn and Sapphire. Of cause a bit flirting and maybe some fluff.

"....and then we woke old Delvin from his slumber! Imagine that. He still denies the story, but I'll never forget it." Brynjolf told Maaike. Both of them burst into laughter. 

After talking to Mercer, they went to the Ragged Flagon. She talked to Delvin. Man was decent enough and she was open minded for his advice, so they got along well enough. But she had to fight the urge to smack the man, since it was clear he watched her ass.

Then she talked to Vex. Maaike knew her type. Like a wild cat. Know how to handle them, and you'll get along just fine. Without caution, they would scratch you. But generally, Vex seemed to be stubborn, arrogant and snappy. In short: a bitch.  _I'll prove myself. Then it'll be fine._

And finally, she spoke to Tonilia. Tough, but one with business sense. Maaike was uncertain how to react to her. For some reason, she liked her.  _Just do business, and you'll be fine._

And she got her new armor. Nice leather outfit.

When the business was concluded, she went drinking with Brynjolf. Now, they have been drinking for hours. Vekel just served them drinks, occasionally adding some snappy remarks to Brynjolf's stories. Maaike would only grin and then add her own snappy comments. It would make them laugh even more.

Maaike felt more and more relaxed. It was so... nice.

"Well then lass. You told me that you came from Cyrodill, correct?"

"Yes?" ..Maybe not so nice. _  
_

Bryn sensed her unease, so he presented the question carefully. "Now that we are sharing stories, you can tell me why you came to Skyrim. You said you were a sellsword; bounty hunter. Why come to Skyrim? Did you do something naughty?" he grinned at that.

She frowned. She hadn't mentioned why she REALLY came Skyrim, or at least she had been very evasive about it. 

"I found myself... cornered. Did some bad business, because I wasn't careful enough to ask more details. So I did jobs, and only later on I found out, what they were about: I had been tricked. SO I wanted to leave. Turns out, my former employer wasn't going to allow it. He needed to silence us-"

"Us?" Brynjolf noted.

 _Shit._ Maaike hesitated a bit but figured that she'd just tell him a bit more than planned. "Me and my group. We did jobs together for five years. Not that it matters. Our employer killed them. I was going to be next but I escaped" _that's not completely a lie"_  destroying his manor in the process. He very likely thinks I'm dead. It's also possible that he died too. I'll never know."

Brynjolf felt sudden anger arise. He had experience with cases like this. Seeing a friend die, is a painful experience. Especially when they die from betrayal.  _Poor Gallus never saw it coming,_ he thought. 

"I'm sorry"

"Yes, well that's all you need to know about it" she answered coldly.

"You are being evasive again lass."

"I know,  _lad_ " she said and grinned a bit.

Brynjolf raised his hands in surrender. "Fine, fine, keep your secrets. I'm just saying you can trust us."

"Trust is an interesting term, Bryn. I trust you in business, which is a bit ironic since we are the Thieves guild. But personal trust is completely different case. Not that I don't trust you at all, I just tend to keep somethings for myself."

"I understand lass. You need not to explain." He smiled a bit, before becoming serious again. "Aren't you curious, what became of the man? Even a little?"

"I don't want to know. He killed my friends, sure, but might as well kill me. I want nothing to do with him. Ever."

Thinking about Ulmer made things just worst. Thinking about the man who raped her and abused her. Murdered her friends. In another life, she would want revenge. But now... She felt she was broken whenever she thought about him. If she ignored it, it would be fine. Wouldn't it?

Bryn nodded. He didn't want to press for more details. There were other things on his mind.

"So... How old are you exactly?"

"Wait what?" Maaike was a bit surprised by the question.

"You said you worked with your friends for five years. You seem young but your wit suggests something else. Will you tell me that secret? As a gentleman, I'll keep it of coure" he grinned.

This made her chuckle. "A real gentleman wouldn't ask lady such a question!"

"Ouch, you wound me lass!"

"Good, I hope it hurts" she smiled. "How old are you?"

"I suppose that's fair to ask. I'm 38. Now's your turn lass."

"Let's see. I'm pretty sure I'm either 24 or 25. Stray kids never did count days. Just tried to stay alive so I am not completely certain."

"Ah well stray kid no longer lass. You have a home" Bryn declared.

"Yeah, and now I really feel like a protege people keep calling me" she snorted.

 "You were in a way, I suppose" he said, face softening a bit. "But now you are part of us. And I'm glad you are."

Maaike was more than surprised when he said that. It sounded genuine.  _That sounds... nice._

"Eh Bryn?"

"Yes lass?"

"How much have you been drinking?"

"Enough apparently" he chuckled. With that he stood up and paid the drinks. He was about to start walking to his room. But then he turned to her and spoke yet again.

"I meant what I said lass. I'm glad you are here."

Now Brynjolf grinned. He saw the blush on Maaike. She coughed once. Then she looked at his eyes. 

"Thank you Brynjolf. That means a lot." She said with full sincerity. 

He smiled and left. 

 _Damn him._ Maaike watched his backside when he left.  _Looks damn good._

_What's wrong with you? Oh yeah. Too many drinks._

 

 

***

 

Brynjolf had mentioned in the Ragged Flagon yesterday that the others were eager to meet her. He was right. She talked to all of them.

Niruin she avoided. Leaving a good life behind because it was dull? That sounds like a-four-year-old-thinking. Sure, when she was younger she might have understood. But not now. Not anymore. Now, she don't know how to have that kind of life. She has seen too much. Maybe if he would have said something like "it wasn't for me, even if I'd tried" she might understand. But not while using the word "dull". 

_Besides... I don't like his voice. Disturbing. Reminds me of.... Nazeem?_

Rune was... well... the word young described him the most. But he was nice enough and quite polite. For his huge size he seemed like a cute puppy. With wit and thieving skills of course.

Vipir The Fleet was strong kind of man. The name gave him a hilarious quality. But his serious side was friendly and chatty yet not too sun-shiny. She enjoyed his company. 

Thrynn... was rough. Not too bright. She got along with him and it was nice to joke around with him but she had been taking care of bandits for a long time, and he seemed a lot like them. Luckily he was a former bandit, now leaved those days behinds. It also eased her mind to hear that he didn't go blindly killing innocents, even when his former leader commanded.

Cynric seemed like a man that had gone through many kinds of things. Depressing. But he was polite, strong and clever. 

 

But then, there was Sapphire. She got Maaike's heart. 

They met and started talking. Maaike asked about Sapphire's real name and past. This triggered something within her that Maaike realized was familiar. She didn't try to push, but it still she tried to make Sapphire open up and let the **pain** , what she clearly felt, out. 

Sapphire opened up to her (what was surprising, since she seemed cold and strong). Not crying but talking with bleeding voice. How she was poor, how she lost even the little she had: her family, her home... Then she was violated. It was almost too much for Maaike to hear. But she wanted to help her. She wanted be there for Sapphire. 

Instant need to help Sapphire went through her. Almost like... sister-kind-of-way.

They sat beside each other on a bed. Maaike comforted her, holding her hands in her own.

"Look, you are here. Those bastards are dead. By your hand. You not only shamed them, you also showed them that how damn strong you are, and that they are pathetic weaklings. You won. And no one will hurt you again. If anyone dares even to  **think** something like that, we'll kill them together." It was ironic. These words might be the words Maaike herself might have wanted to hear.... she isn't sure.

"I... Thanks. That doesn't take the memories away, but it's a real burden to have something like that on your shoulders." Sapphire retorted quietly.

Maaike was quiet for a moment. Then sighed. "Look, I know how you feel."

This made Sapphire look at her with new interest.

"I have lost everything I have. Twice. Both of cases are... well, pretty close to yours. Details are different." Maaike continued.

"Wanna share?"

"Well I suppose it's only fair I tell you one of the stories.. And it might make it feel better..."

"It's okay. I can listen."

Maaike was quiet again. Then started her first story.

"As a little girl, I lived in the forests, in a little house with my family. Father, mother and two older brothers. They were hunters, I think. I lived in Skyrim, those days. I have always considered it my home. Papa taught me how to fight and hunt. I loved that life but...." she swallowed hard "..one night I came home bit too late. Everything was quiet. I went inside. I could literally say that we got a new wall paint, since there was so much blood. Dad and my brothers cut to pieces. Mama dead and naked on the floor with... well you can guess what was done to her.

I vomited. Too horrible to see. Then I saw movement from outside. Whoever did this, was coming back. I hid behind a barrel, taking a dagger with me. Man that came there was obviously on skooma. Even I knew that. He rambled something about payment or that shit. I was filled with anger, even though I was a little girl, so I stupidly rushed to stab him. I succeeded but it wasn't enough to kill him. We started fighting. He was the one who did this scar on my face, to me." Maaike said and trailed the thin scar line with her finger.

"Then, eventually, I managed to kill him. I was lucky. From there, I ran. That's my first story."

"That's... sick." Sapphire tried to hide her nausea. Poorly.

"Yes. But I've moved on." Maaike simply stated.

"How about the second one?"

"I honestly don't wish to tell it."

"I understand. But I'm here if you want to talk. I want to help you, I think. In the end, that was what you did to me." Sapphire said, bit awkwardly.

Maaike smiled. "That you already did Sapphire. Thank you."

Sapphire smiled back.

The bond between them now was acknowledged. Bond of two sisters.

 

 

 


	6. Cold Is The Blood She Sees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike does her job. With style. But is that a good thing?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. I've been busy lately. Plus I haven't been able to access my computer.

"You sure about this? Would it too much to ask for a reconsideration? Yes? Well shit." Marcurio whined.

Maaike just rolled her eyes. Why, on Dibella's name, did the man have such a big mouth? And little backbone? Not that she was very surprised. cocksure attitude was typical for Imperials.  _Maybe I should have hired someone else._ Maaike shook her head. _Well, the good thing is, I know he won't double-cross me. He wouldn't dare._ Hirelings take their money, but breaking the deal would give them bad reputation. Besides, he wouldn't be there to witness what se was about to do.

And she made sure she'd pay him money for discretion.

The mission was very clear: burn three of the beehives, then investigate the mansion for clues. Aringoth cut them off a deal. which caused problems with Maven Black-Briar. This would send a clear message to him. _And we'll find out why he did this, when I investigate the mansion..._

Goldenglow estate was on an island, in the middle of a lake. It was surrounded by mercenaries. Vex had used the sewers but it hadn't worked out. Maaike was feeling bloodthirsty so she just planned to kill anyone standing on her way. Which meant, of course, all of the mercenaries. She knew their type: they would just attack her blindly. In the endm she used to be different kind of mercenary. You could say, she used mind more often than usual grunts. All in her former team were like that...

_Let it be._

So Maaike had formed a plan. She hired Marcurio, the whining cocky hireling mage, who would cause a distraction: he'd go to the only bridge to the island, and there do his... well... magic. He'll do it so well (probably killing few of them in the process) that it'll draw the rest of the mercenaries's attentions. Meanwhile Maaike will swim to the back of the island and plant magic runes on the ground, and perhaps some traps. Then she'll burn the beehives and take her position somewhere behind the runes. 

It's a trap for the idiotic grunts.

The burning beehives WILL draw their attention more than Marcurio' distraction (unless they are very incompetent). And when they do return, they'll trigger the runes and she'll shoot them with her poisoned arrows. If it comes to hand-to-hand combat, she'll just use her daggers. Hopefully the guys inside the mansion wouldn't bother come to check what all the noice is about.

"Alright. Let's do this." Maaike said.

_Bryn will be proud._

 

 

 

***

 

 

Brynjolf was hiding behind a bush. His view of the area was well enough. He'd made sure Mercer hadn't caught him following Maaike. Sure, the lass could watch out for herself, he knew that. But he just wanted to observe the lass's mission and the lass herself too. This was a dangerous job. He had protested against it, but Mercer wouldn't hear any of it.

Frankly, he didn't like the way Mercer was looking at the lass.

Sure, she was good to look at but Mercer's stare wasn't like.... well... his.

 _..Wait, what the hell?_ _He is my boss! Cut it out._

Brynjolf wasn't happy about hiring Marcurio. Thief's job wasn't about paying someone else to do it for them. And less people were involved, the better. Luckily for them, he knew this hireling wouldn't cross Thieves guild. Guy was a honest sort, when it came to business deals. But still... 

 However, he felt there was something else to it. What would Maaike have him do?

_I'll see soon enough. No reason to worry, eh? Time to focus._

Bryn shrugged.

_Wait... Is that lightning? What the f-_

 

 

***

 

 

 "-UUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!" yelled Marcurio while he ran, while the pissed off mercenaries chased him.

_How in the hell's name did he manage to get their attention so quickly? He must be... well perhaps I was too harsh on him. I'll buy him drinks later._

Surprisingly, she wasn't afraid of creating acquaintances. _Now's not the time to think this! Get to the fucking work, you lazy-ass-bitch!_

Maaike swam quickly to the island. There were only one enemy there, rest were after Marcurio. That large man didn't see her. So she killed him. By throwing a knife to back of his head.

Making the explotisive runes on the ground costed a lot of magic, but luckily had lots of it within her. Then Maaike proceeded to the beehives.

 _Basic fire spell will do._ Maaike called upon her magicka. Fire started crackling on her hand. There was some energy left. It would suffice. She directed flames towards the beehives. They started to burn immediately. Smoke was going up to the skies, with the lightly blowing wind.

 _Time to take position._ Maaike found nice and shadowy spot behind a conveniently placed close to her, behind the runes, next to the mansion. She prepared her bow and arrows.

 _They are closing in..._ Maaike could hear curses of the men. She focused, and took her shooting position.

"....for a fuckin' secon' an' there is a fuckin' flames comin' up from behin' our arses! Fuckin piece of-" mercenery was interrupted By an arrow in his throat.

Everything went like she planned. Men started to panic and this caused them to search for the shooter. Of course they walked on her runes and traps. Fire, ice and lightning tearing men apart, blood spilling around, burning flesh going to ashes and other gory things happening. She just kept shooting... She mainly ignored the screams but also reveled in them. The feeling of control, the ultimate desicion of life and death was... overwhelming.

She saw the bodies on the ground. She had killed so many. She defeated them in combat.

Yet, she was losing.

Herself.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Brynjolf had never seen anything like it. Lass was truly intelligent. And gruesome. She used tact, not letting all be done by random chance and guessing. He wasn't sure if he was terrified or amazed. Killing wasn't what the guild stood by, but if one person was capable of something like this, she would have much more on her sleeves.

Everything he was attracted to.

He saw lass enter the estate from front doors. _The gall._ Everything was silent for a while. Then she reemerged through the doors, into his view again. Bloodless, but surely killed everyone inside... If someone survived it must have been Aringoth, since Bryn had requested it.

But he was worried. For the lass. She seemed pale, and that usual coldness was on her face.

_What's with you lass?_

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Maaike killed rest of the mercenaries. No one was able to escape.

She didn't kill Aringoth though. Just got the information out of him. He gave her a key to a safe that was in the basement. She can be persuasive, when she wants... And Bryn had asked her to leave the man alive. Although Aringoth was pretty sure he'd die anyway. By someone else.

_Since when have I cared about of another person when it comes to me doing my job? Just let it be. It matters not. Just business._

She got some weird bee-statue that she planned on selling to Delvin. Then she went to basement and opened the safe. Curiosity hit so she read the letters within it. Aringoth had sold the fucking estate.

_What a fucking idiot._

She pocketed all of the letters and took some gold too. _Wouldn't be too bad to use these later._ But she thought that only to calm herself. She was a strong woman. Of mixed bloods, but her spirit was from a nord. Nothing would make her feel ill, or bad. Or at the very least, it shouldn't.

She killed so many. She killed, because she didn't care. She wanted to care, but couldn't.

That made her feel so sick. She would have vommited but luckily she was able to hold it back. She went outside. Marcurio would need his payment. He'd be waiting in th Bee and Barb. Probably is there at the very moment. She had, in the end, showed him how to do the invisibility spell. He wouldn't be dead.

But did she care?

She wanted to.

But no tears were shed. Just cold business.

Nothing more.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Mercer was at his desk. The news of the Goldenglow estate had already been heard. He had his own sources. Displeasingly, he had noticed Brynjolf leave without his say so. _Man is becoming really invested on this Maaike._ Surprisingly he was somehow expecting this. He wasn't the one to be ridiculously faithul. Not because of what he feels. But the woman was like ice cold air. You feel it on your skin even through your clothes.

Woman did some damage, but didn't get caught.

Mercer found himself in his twisted thoughts, thinking about that woman. Everything in this Guild, was his. His thievies, his tools, his money and his influence. _**His.**_

Now, especially that woman.

He owned it all.

_Mine._

 

 

 


	7. Drink Required

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike needs to shake off some bad feelings, with the best known option: Drinks. But sometimes there can be unwanted results... Very dangerous kind of results. Luckily there is someone for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sexual content. Might be trigger for some people. You've been warned.

Brynjolf quickly returned to the cistern. He eagerly waited for Maaike. What was weird, he found himself thinking for words. He was a silver tongued person, words were always there for him so he didn't have to search for them. But what he had seen was beyond belief and sensational at the very least.

 _Lass seemed bit off..._ He was worried for her. And intrigued.

Maaike was like the sea: Weather unpredictable, only clouds might show signs. One moment she was happy and jokefull like warm sea on the shore, wind playing with little waves. Next, she was dark and angry, a storm that could ravage anything. Or cold and still... deadly and lonely.

He wasn't  enthusiastic about the last option. Yet that was her recent status.

Again, shaking these thoughts away, he saw her walking closer to him. _She must have used the secret entrance. Why wouldn't she? I guess I didn't notice...._  Bryn was still a bit confused by what he had seen. Even his thoughts were bit messy.

_Well, let us see what comes of this._

 

 

 

"Word is that Goldenglow has been hit. Excellent job lass! Don't tell 'em I said so, but I think that even Mercer cracked a smile" he said proudly.

 Maaike shifted uncomfortably. "Thanks... I, uh, just did my part" _and killed more than my share of men....._ "and I found this letter in that idiot's safe."

She handed Brynjolf the letter. Change in his face would have been funny, if she was in some other mood.

"He _sold_ Goldenglow? What was that idiot thinking?"

"I don't know. Probably nothing, since he seems scared shitless of someone. Emotions are a bitch sometimes. I did leave him alive though." Maaike could swear Brynjolf seemed visibly relieved.

Bryn nodded. "Do you notice this symbol on the bottom?"

"No. Never seen anything like it."

"Damn! Well, I'll see to this. Anyone who dares to cross Maven or the Guild, will get what's coming to them. But enough of that. That job must not have been easy. Here, your payment for a job well done" he smiled to her and gave her nice amount of gold.

Maikee just couldn't deal with Brynjolf's company. Not now. He'd notice her sullen mood which would lead to questions. She tried to answer Brynjolf's charming smile but she barely managed to get her face neutral. She needed to breathe and...

_Drink!_

"I think I could use some of this money now. You know, to get a drink" she tried to say, not wanting to be too abrupt.

"I was heading to the Ragged Flagon myself. Wanna join me? Bet you can't drink me under the table!"

_Damn him! Damn his nice attitude. Damn his smooth voice!_

"Sorry but I'll pass. I'm going to the Bee and Barb. I need to, uhh" _say something, anything_ "...meet Marcurio". _That's actually true. I need to pay him._

Brynjolf's smirk disappeared. "Marcurio, huh. You gonna pay for his services, aren't you?

"I- wait, you know about that?" This took Maaike bit off guard.  _  
_

"Aye. Word tend to get around."

"Figures. Well... yes.. As a matter of fact, I need to pay him."  _Does he listen to ALL rumors around here?_

"Just be careful with that. You did your job, but discretion is part of our profession... Hired help isn't against rules but I wouldn't advise using him too much, I mean-"

Maaike rolled her eyes. How did this conversation lead into this?

 _What's with the change in his expression? He does seem to change it quickly from_    _'I'm-proud-of-you'-face' to 'I'm-questioning-your-tactics-face'. What's with that? He knew I had help, didn't seem to bother him until I just MENTIONED Marcurio.... Well fuck this._

"Look, I get it! Do you have some problem with Marcurio?" she interrupted Brynjolf. She was getting frustrated. She didn't know why though.

"I am just giving you an advice. Finish your business with him and let it be. It would save you from snooping of some non-involved guy. Knowing him, he is stubborn."

Maaike hadn't even talked much to that Imperial. Brynjolf was good with reading people. He should know by now that she is not some green recruit: She knew what needed to be done.

 Then realization hit her. "Wait, are you  jealous?"

"Excuse me lass?" Bryn's frown was getting worse.

"Nevermind. I'll just go now. See ya later." Maaike waved a goodbye to Bryn and left.

_Maybe he really has a good reason for... that attitude._

 

 

Bryn looked after her.  _Damn it._

"You are both too damn stubborn for your own good, you know that?" said Vipir, who had been watching this whole display with Sapphire and Rune.

"Go run a your head up your arse, why don't you.  _Fleet._ " Bryn growled. 

"Isn't that a ridiculous topic to start an argument about? Why would they bother?" Rune asked.

"You really are clueless, aren't you?" Sapphire snorted.

"Shut it. All of you. Unless you want to be assigned to some worthless shit jobs for rest of the month." 

Niruin, who had just walked in, chuckled. "You wouldn't. We'd tell on you! Maaike wouldn't be happy."

"Oh for fuck's sake...." Brynjolf said with frustration. "You really don't know when to stop, do you?"

"It's part of my charm" Niruin said, smirking.

Bryn couldn't help it. He had to smile a bit too.

_Gotta talk to Maaike. Fix this shit. But first...._

"Niruin, Fleet and Rune. You'll get the shit jobs you so much wanted. Perhaps... in Winterhold, lovely weather there, you see?" he said with thick sarcasm. 

"What did I do??" Rune whined. "Why not Sapphire?"

Bryn just laughed at their misery and left.

Sapphire leaned closer and whispered: "Because Maaike likes me. And I like her."

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

"Look dearie, you don't need to pay me the whole prize... I mean I had fun and I did loot those assholes from their valuables and-"

 _Oh maker. He won't shut it._ Maaike had been negotiating with Marcurio about his payment but the he wouldn't shut up.

"Oh for f..... Look. I pay you the full sum, and you'll buy me drinks? How about that?"

Marcurio's face brightened even further. "I always enjoy beautiful company and good mead! It's a deal!" Before she could give him the bag of coin, he already rushed to order drinks from Keraava.

Maaike rolled her eyes and sat down on a chair, leaned on the table, near the stairs. _With luck, Marc will pass out. If he doesn't, I will FORCE him to pass out._

When he finally came with drinks (finally) he claimed his payment. Marc tried to pry for information about the whole job, but she evaded them. When he asked more, she just offered a new drink. It passed the time. She wasn't interested in talking. Not now. Not that Marcurio was the worst kind of company. She just wasn't in the mood.

Luckily, turns out that the Imperial had very bad constitution, when it came to alcohol. It took only a few hours and he went sleeping to his room with a little help from random customers, who eventually left home.  _  
_

Now, she was alone with her thoughts. At the moment, she was the only customer at the Bee and Barb. Only bartender, Keraava, was there with her.

 _I really don't want to kill. No, I_ _**can't**_ _kill. Not anymore... Dragons were bad enough but humans.... Just.. **No.**  I don't want to turn into same kind of madman who murdered my family._

Every time she killed, she felt a rush. Not just adrenaline: Lust. Need. Want. Her hatred and suffering had turned her emotions into something more twisted and dark. Love lost it meaning... No more equal feelings that were united between two people. Happiness had been tainted by her disgustingly harsh perspective. 

_Moving here helped but... Am I truly surviving? Escape was my intend but... Am I still escaping? Like a fearful rabbit? Need more drinks._

Maaike was waken from her thoughts when she heard the doors open. Guards. They were most likely here to relax, since they didn't have their helmets on.

Bitter sweet scent came to Maaike's senses: It was mixed with those men's disgusting sweat and their garlic smelling breaths. She'd recognize that smell from anywhere:  _Skooma_.

This wasn't going to end well. Still, Maaike kept drinking her wine. She had already drank a few bottles.

"Heey-o. What do 'e have here, eh?" One guard came behind her, leaning to back of her chair.

"Lookie lookie. Isn't that pretty birdie? What do you say honey? Waitin' for any gentlemen?" Other came to sit to the chair next to her. Few others came around her.

Maaike just sat there. Annoyance creeping in. She took a sip of her wine, then placed the bottle on the table. "You blind? 'Course I'm alone. And I don't see any gentlemen around here."

Her comment caused some of the other guards to laugh. Rest of them, however, were not exactly pleased. They huffed a bit.

"Well, we might wanna keep you some company, lonely an' all. Care to be a good little miss, an' entertain our humble pack of men? You'll have a good time with us...." said the guard next to her. He leaned in to put an arm around her shoulders but she reacted quickly: She kicked at his chair so he fell to the floor, stood up so quickly that the chair she was sitting on launched back, strongly enough to force the guard behind her to stumble and eventually fell to the floor too. She took her wine and poured it on those men's faces. 

"I'm not interested in animals. Especially in pigs like you. Need a tumble? Go fuck yourselves." She threw the bottle on the floor, just next to the men's heads. They were staring at her mouth open and eyes wide. Proudly and pissed (also a bit tipsy) she walked out of the door.

Maaike felt a bit bad for Keraava. She'd had to put up with those fucks.

_It's damn late.... Almost early._

Maaike walked to the path, that was just beside the city wall: It went around Riften, and it would also lead to graveyard. From there she would go to the secret entrance and return to cistern. She was tipsy so her steps were slower than usual, but she did get to that path and now she slowed her pace even more.

_It's beautiful._

Moonlight was almost shining. Dark shadows on flowers made them more unique and their colours seemed more... deep and ravishing. She touched the stone wall at her left side.... Dank. There were butterflies... Ones that enjoyed the mysteries of night.

Kind of like her.

Being Dragonborn had been a solitary job: She experienced a lot of cold and quiet nights all over Skyrim. But she had loved it. All the nights were different but they still were nights of Skyrim. In order to be alone she had been cheating all people she had met about her identity... A lonely wanderer, bloodthirsty murderer, ruthless savage and merciless Dragonborn. She hated to admit it but back then, when her life was at shambles and she didn't feel anything, she enjoyed those only feelings she had: Those mosterous thoughts and feelings... What she did.... Made her feel alive.

Maaike grimanced.

 _But I don't want that anymore. I don't need to feel alive. I am_ _alive. I am Maaike. Dragonblood will not define me. Neither will my past... I can move foward... So.. Just. Let. It. BE! You've been happier here. Bryn brought you to the guild, made you laugh and through him you met others who are kind of like a family._

Then realization hit her. She indeed had been feeling **better**. Not just to the outside: Inside as well. And more she thought about it, all led to Bryn. They had known each other for only a short while but it felt so much more. Only now she had discovered it. 

_Yet I was acting like a teenage girl? Sure he was childish too and it could barely count as a... fight but... I need to find him._

What she failed to observe, were the people following her. She was deep in thought and now more than tipsy so she had been distracted.

Huge hulk of a man grabbed her elbows from behind, drawing her back against his chest. His grib was strong. Before she was able to react, other man came to her view and pressed his palm on her mouth to shut her up. He grinned viciously at her.

Then he started talking: "Well bitch, you weren't very nice to me and my men. You'll need to make it up to us, don't you think? We'll figure somethin' out, won't we men?"

_Oh for Dibella's blessed tits! These dickless guards dared to come after me???_

Maaike tried to struggle but physical strenght wasn't good enough to compete with the huge guard holding her. She scanned her surroundings: Six men. Close range. Her legs weren't working as they should. Maybe the wine was stronger than she thought...

_Shit._

"You said you weren't interested in animals? Well, we are gonna fuck you like one. Hold 'er boys!" He took his hand from her mouth only to punch her face. She winced but didn't scream. Maaike refused to give them the pleasure. People were sleeping: Other guards wouldn't care... She'd have to find a way....

Next punch landed on her stomach, which took air out of her. Other men grabbed her hands so that the man, who was behind her, could put his hands strongly around her stomach, just were the main asshole had hit her.

She spitted blood on them. "You fucks. Is that all you've got? Hasn't it passed your bedtime, little bitches?"

The main man laughed, grabbing her chin. "Who needs a bed?" With that he let go of her chin and started ripping the collar of her leather tunic, which she was currently wearing (Maaike had changed herself out of the guild armor before she went for drinks).

"You won't get away with this" she swore. He didn't stop. Tunic was now open and the shirt under it was thin material: It showed her shapes. With appreciating stare he moved to grope her breasts with both hands.

"I'm captain. I'll get away with anything.... Let me show you."

 _I'll show you sick son of a whore..._ When the bastard leaned closer, like a wolf she bit him on his lower lip: not letting go.

"AGGGHH FUCK THE BITCH IS BITIN'!!!!!"

With a hurried and sharp pull she managed to tear his lip open: This caused him to take steps backwards, growling and holding his his mouth, trying helplessly to stop the bleeding.

Maaike spitted out his flesh that she had bitten off. Other guards were too slow to understand what the fuck just happened. _Idiots._ When they did, Maaike could not stop them.

She was thrown to the ground, and they started kicking and punching her. "You could have played along, now you'll get _hurt"_ growled the bleeding captain, kicking her to her side.

She cried out from pain. She pressed her eyes shut. How could she have been this stupid? She should have seen any other advandage but now she had screwed up. Even her magicka didn't work.

_Someone. Help._

"Awww. You gettin' weaker? Not too good for us now eh?" laughed they.

_Anyone._

"Take off her trousers."

_Bryn._

 

 

 

Before anyone could take a breath, two of the guards went down. It was all a blur for Maaike. Like a shadow coming to life. It attack like a sabercat towards rest of the men, smooth wisp taking them to the ground. Voices implied broken bones and bloody faces. Maaike tried to move, blinking her eyes, so she'd see better... Yet it became darker. Men tried to escape but the shadow overcame them: voices of more smashing and... cutting? Captain was begging on his knees. But the shadow showed no mercy like a bug, he was put down.... Smashed by this dark shadow.

Shadow came closer to her... lifting her bit off in a warm embrace, touching her cheek and brushing lock of her hair out of her face.

"Maaike! Maaike! Shit!" Brynjolf exhaled.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd appreciate comments, so I'd be able to improve myself. Thanks for all kudos!!!! :))


	8. Warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brynjolf is shocked to discover that Maaike is in trouble. A new side of him, a dangerous (and sexy) side, comes to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just kind of some fluff and comfort. Oh and 'course we have our sexy Bryn <3

Brynjolf drank final bottle of black-briar mead in his own personal quarters. There were perks with being one of the guildmasters. Privacy was one of them. 

He had considered following Maaike, but chose this rare comfort of a lone drink.

 _Surely she has returned by now._ He walked to the hallway of his room. It lead to the cistern. But she was nowhere to be found.  _Perhaps Ragged Flagon? She could have passed out there._

He checked the comfortable bar, but nothing. Only rat-shit.

 _Perhaps she chose to spend more time with Marcurio._ Thought of it made him frown. Knob in his stomach was becoming bitter and sour. Lass could choose what she wanted to do on her free time. He had seen how well she was able handle herself. And yet..

_Better go now find that woman. When sober she is deadly and stubborn. When drunk, thieves will loose their restraint. And sober men will too..._

He went through the ratway, not the secret entrance. He made sure she hadn't passed out there. From there he went to Bee and barb. No one there. Not even Marcurio. Maybe they went to his room... He shook the thought away.

  _Nahh. If my charm hasn't smoothed her, then I doubt that good-for-nothing imperial succeeded to even banter._

Talen-jei gave him a hateful gaze. He was cleaning up the floor. Broken bottles and wine. Smell of skooma was in the air.

"Have you seen her?" Brynjolf cut to the chase. They'd know who he meant.

Keraava shifted uncomfortably. The fear they had been spreading was still... raw.

"She, uh, had a....skirmish with guards. Didn't seem local. Anyway she left through that door, not too long ago." She pointed out.

Now Talen-jei opened his mouth: "And it seems that the guards left that way too. With displeased tone, I might add. Not too long ago."

Uneasy feeling was raising in his backbone. He looked around the tavern. His gaze found no one else, beside them. "This. Never. Happened." It was an open warning to encourage discretion. With that, he left.

Immediately, he heard clatter, shouts and...  _Muffled voices?_ He sprinted to the direction where the voices were coming. It didn't take long. There were men who had gathered around something on the ground...

"Take off her trousers!!" ordered some guy whose lips were torn open.

Brynjolf froze. He just got a better view. Empty look... Bleeding beautiful eyes yet strong and unyielding.

_Maaike._

Just then something clicked within him. Anger rose from his fingertips as prickle. Time stopped around him. Breath came out as growl. Brynjolf drew his daggers and without hesitation he let his instincts take control. Darkness of the shadows were his guide. Some may say that it was pure luck that his movement and strikes actually succeeded so preciously. Bryn, however, felt a difference. Perfect deliver of finesse. (Or his mind was turning to Delvin's).

His dark emerald didn't blink. From the back he drove his daggers into their necks, and bringing them down then swinging away from the guards: they fell down, blood pouring to start a river under them. With the next heartbeats, his sabre cat lunge took them down: His dagger slashed their sides open, finishing with blows to the back of the head. 

One more man. He attacked with his blade drawn. With a quick slash, Bryn managed to cut his hand so he was forced to drop the useless iron blade. He screamed, holding his now bleeding hand. He was the last one.

He got to his knees... Begging. Slowly Brynjolf walked towards him.

"Please, don't kill me! I'm just...  didn't mean to hurt her like that! Drinks just get the better of you sometimes yeah?"

 _Skooma_. Coldly Bryn came to stand in front of him. This was the man who gave commands to other men here. Now Brynjolf stared into his eyes, that showed cowardice.

 Bryn started with a low, hoarse and dangerous voice:

 "No one.." he got closer, "...messes up..." eyes darkening, "...with my..." voice trailing off "... _Lass._ "

With both daggers he slashed and cut man's throat open. He choked on his own blood and fell to the ground. 

Brynjolf watched his handwork. All dead. He didn't usually kill. This... he would need to sort out later. He had his reasons. His reasons...

 _Maaike!!_ He startled, and ran towards her as quickly as possible, sitting down, taking her into his arms. He was trying to shake her awake.

"Maaike! Maaike! Shit!" Her face was bloodied, clothes torn (but on) and she was not waking up. He winched at that: For a heart beat, time stopped around him. He felt his own heart sink to the deepest abyss of emotion. Worry crawled at the bottom of his stomach, climbing higher. His soul was suddenly filled with distress: This, however, caused him to wake up from this pause. It made him determined to be faster than any other thief trying to run after a treasure.

He lifted her up in his arms and ran along the path they were on, towards guild secret entrance. It didn't take them long to get to the cistern. Sapphire and Rune were up. Mercer was gone and for that Brynjolf thank the divines. 

"Bryn, what in the name of....?" Sapphire hurriedly asked, as she saw Maaike's condition. 

"Sapphire. Rune. Go to the path from graveyard around the city. There will be bodies. Search 'em. Either dispose of 'em or plant something to plant 'evidence' on 'em. Bribe other guards to avoid that place, if they have patrols there. Do what you must but be as discreet as possible."

Rune and Sapphire didn't question. Just acted. Bryn had that look about him: It was no time to waver then.

 

He walked to a hallway that led from cistern, to his own quarters. He placed Maaike on her bed. Usually, he wouldn't bring anyone, even someone he was going fuck, to his quarters.

He took off his gloves. Bryn knew how to heal worst of the wounds. _Unavoidable talent in this position, I'd say._  Sighing he took heal potions and other supplies.

 _This will be a long night._  

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

 

  _Pulling to the darkness. Carl at the door of the oblivion itself. She was the girl without a name._

_"Maaike" He called to her like a siren. Yes, that's her name. Yet it sounded so foreign, did it not? From his lips, to her ears. Honey has never tasted more bitter._

_Did she ever love him truly? Or was that just illusion made by passion raging between them? Or did Ulmer rip all true emotion from her, even from her past, when he violated her? Carl was just a name now. Never had it sounded more empty. More nameless was his name._

_No longer were the eyes she saw colored by honey: They were red like snowberries. Bleeding you to eat; promising goods and sweetness. Yet it didn't convince her, neither did the smile._

_All were tainted by death; All were empty._

_It was colors of the light that summoned her._

 

 

 

 

_***_

 

 

 

 

 

Maaike inhaled deeply as she woke up, jumped up a bit, on an unknown bed, in a unknown room. She breathed fast, sweating and distressed. Pain on her side, and on her head. Panic raising. She still felt those men on her touching and... and...

"Whoah there lass! Take it easy!" Immediately he was next to her, on the bed, just sitting there with his relaxing and smoothing presence.

Maaike made a quick examination of the room and herself.  _Bedroom? Somewhere at the ratway? Or near the cistern? According to the smell, we are near it._  She was wearing a spacious tunic with Brynjolf's smell. It probably  _was_ his. And her trousers were gone. Only her undergarments were still intact. _Hopefully._ This made her blush a bit. She could feel bandages all over where it hurt the most.

"What happened? And where the hell am I? What the **fuck** happened?!" Maaike blurted with desperate concern and still obvious distress. She was trying to get off the bed, while holding bed's covers. 

 "Hold it there. It's alright. Breath steadily!" Brynjolf put his hands on her shoulders and looked at her eyes. His palms were warm and strong. Maaike couldn't help herself: she calmed down. His soothing presence kept her from running away, but she refused to lie down on the bed, so she just sat there, looking into his eyes.

Maaike swallowed. "What- I mean did they-..." she couldn't finish. Something was rising up her throat.

"No. They are taken care of. Everything's alright." Bryn said reassuringly. There was a sparkle there: seriousness and determination. His hands started to feel hot on her.

She was more at ease now, so she sighed with relief. However, she needed to know more. "Bryn-"

"No need for that. I'll explain. Just relax?"

"Okay, I can do that. But you know me. I'm impatient and stubborn so please..." she said with weak expression of humor.

He grinned a bit, took his hands off her shoulders and put them on his lap. Looking at his foot, to gather his thoughts, then he looked her again and started talking:

"I killed those bastards. Didn't think. Just acted. Rare for me, but necessary for you. Then I got you here" he patted his bed "to my very own roomy shit hole, on my bed.  I thought you'd appreciate comfy environment, when you'd wake up; Smell isn't so bad here, as it is at the cistern. I sent Sapphire and Rune clean up the mess that was left behind us."

Maaike was speechless. He did this... for her? "I.... really don't know what I'm supposed to say."

"I'm afraid that's not all."

"What do you mean?"

Bryn hesitated a bit. He put his hands on his face, rubbing his eyes. "These men were not just some random guards. They were hired by a rival guild that's trying to get it's footing on Skyrim. Delvin knows more about them. They deal with thievery, murder, skooma or slavery... A real mess. Shit, like we don't have enough problems.. Now some fuck-heads are attacking our guild members..." his fists tightened. A clear fatigue was on him.

"Bryn I... I'm sorry".  _I'm sorry????? What the fuck does that help??_ She meant it though. No pity. Just guilt and embarrassed.

He shifted to look at her. Cold in his eyes, yet warm in his meaning. "You have  _nothing_ to be sorry about. This mess? Not your work.  _Never_ feel guilty for it. Understood?"

Maaike couldn't help herself, she had to smile bit, like she was intoxicated, then she nodded. "Yes... It's just..."

"What?"

"You are doing everything for the guild... That's why you talked to me about your concern of Marcurio... I think.... and I just snapped at you like a foolish child. It was unworthy of me."

His expression softened. "I should not have underestimated you. I scolded you, treating you like a naive girl. But you are no silly girl. You are a woman,  _lass_. I'll remember that in the future."

"But still-"

"Let's agree that we are both stubborn as hell, okay? This doesn't have to be too complicated. Besides... We won't get that one wrong. Especially in my case." He chuckled.

She had to give a laugh at that. "Agreed."

"Now rest for a bit. Then go eat or something. I'll be at the flagon, discussing what to do with this rival guild... Delvin has some information." He stood up and walked to the door that led to the hallway that apparently led to cistern.

He opened the door but just when he was about to leave, Maaike halted him with her voice: "Bryn?"

"Yes lass?"

"Thank you. Brynjolf. For everything."

He gave her a wicked grin. "I like it when you call out my name." With that he left.

Maaike felt a warm tingling in her stomach. Like butterflies but better.

 _In a way... I am a silly girl, aren't I?_ _Fuck me!_

 

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

 

Brynjolf closed the door behind him. Then he quietly leaned back of his head against it. When she had been asleep, the burning hatred, as well as despair, had been creeping within him. He had punched the wall for couple of times. These men  _dared_ to hurt his Maaike. 

_My Maaike? Shit. I don't own her. I will not act as if it were so. Not while.... Not ever._

But he wanted to protect her. He had to protect her. Now, here, leaning against his own door, Brynjolf felt his heart melt in it's very core; for her. Maaike's eyes... Those ice blue eyes... had never seemed so warm as they did now. He was aroused only by a thought of her. 

  _By the eight.... Someone needs to protect me from her._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, and for ALL the support :)))) <3


	9. Lavender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sparkle between Maaike and Brynjolf has them both confused... and intoxicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is some... well "cutie" time with Bryn. :)

She slept for a while. To gather her strengths. Although thoughts of Bryn and the recent attack bothered her, she had a good rest.  When she finally woke up, the covers were on the floor. 

_Huh. A wild dream perhaps? Can't remember._

She didn't even care. She felt too relieved. More than in many years. Bryn had been supportive, and he wouldn't just gossip about last nights events to others; He'd just tell what was necessary in order to catch those mother fuckers. She'd have to go do some little jobs, to get more money for the guild: resources would help them hunt the bastards down. Meanwhile Mercer would investigate the whole  Goldenglow-shit. 

_Well good on that bastard. I'll just be happy to get a move on._

She stood up from the bed, crapping the covers and throwing them back on the bed. She stretched a bit. Cool air was refreshing on her skin. She got a nagging feeling something was missing. 

With a quick look around...

"Wait... Where the hell are my clothes?"

 

 

***

 

 

"So, what? You are telling me that rival guild 'em selves, attacked our own gal, not to mention she is our THE new potential one, and they are takin' footin' on our home? On Skyrim?" Delvin tried to swallow what Brynjolf had just told. Before, he came to see Bryn: he was tending Maaike. They talked briefly and Bryn mentioned the guild and asked him to look in to it.

_"I_ _'ll explain all else later. For now, I'll look after her"_ he had said.

 Then he made Delvin go away. Without much info, Delv had send letters for his contacts and started researching. It would only be matter of time and resources, when they'd find more information (besides what they already knew) about this guild. It was all just a fucking mess.

Luckily Delvin was not an amateur. 

"It certainly looks that way Delv. What else can I say?" Brynjolf said and took a sip from his drink.

"Well you could tell me that why, why in the fucks name, did you leave such a mess behind ya? Sure, kill 'em bastards, but did ya have to paint the place with blood? Hell, the blood is so stuck on the ground, even Kynareth couldn't wash it away!"

Brynjolf placed his bottle on the table and gave a cool look:"We need to send a message don't we? We both know how enemies and rivals are handled: especially those who use such mother fucker tactics." 

"You know exactly what I mean Bryn and-"

"What _you_  should understand is one thing Delv.." said suddenly and stood up from his chair, smashing his fists on the table. Delvin was taken aback, because of the serious look on Brynjolf's eyes. "..I  _know_ what I did. I did it on  _purpose_. And I would do it again, without faltering. Period. No question or doubt, what so ever. Not from me, and not from you..." Bryn swallowed. "Not even from Mercer.." he finished silently.

Delvin was silenced, and Bryn started to turn around, to take care of some other business when he heard Delvin mumble:

"Hopefully she'll be worth all this trouble." It was a warning, like  _'be careful'_.

Brynjolf gave Delvin a side glance.

_She is._

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

"BRYNJOLF YOU SON OF A B-"

"Hey! My mother was a good baggage, lass!" remarked as defense.

Maaike throw pillow at him. "SO it was just fucking good idea to leave me here for a goddamn decade without ANYTHING to wear, besides tour tasteless shirt-"

"My sense of fashion is unique."

"-uniquely tasteless shirt-"

"That's low."

"- and you fucking didn't even send me anything to eat or drink! And I'm so fucking bored down here!" Maaike pointed at him with accusing finger. " I could have gone to work or talk to others, help Delv or argue with Vex or-"

"-bitch to me about fashion?" Bryn smirked. He definitely found this amusing. 

"Oh no you don't! One more sarcastic remark and I'll stuff that dagger, on your belt, horizontally up your ASS." The stare upon Maaike's face was like a cold murder.

He couldn't hold back anymore. It was too hilarious to see her in his shirt, yelling with blushing looks. So, he chuckled.

"You are so lovely when you get mad."

For a moment, Maaike was taken aback, mouth opening in surprise and confusing rising up, as well as the heat on her face. Blushes. Then realization hit her. Then came the scowl.

"You... you did that on  _purpose_?!"  _  
_

He gave that common smirk of his. "Now why would I do that to you lass?" He said playfully.

"YOU SON OF A B-"

"Again: My mother was a real treasure!"

And so was the other pillow thrown at him as well. 

"Are we having a pillow fight?" 

"Oh we are having a fight alright." 

"I can work with that" he said with a playful tone and started walking towards her.

Maaike's face was at confusion. "What are you-" she couldn't finish the sentence since Bryn placed his arms around her waist and picked her up.

"HEY!" Maaike squealed and tried to get off. Brynjolf's touch was ticklish. Maaike couldn't help herself: she giggled.

"Wait, did you just giggle?" 

"N-no! Don't you fucking smirk!"

"You are ticklish!" He laughed a full body laugh.

"I am not!!" 

"Oh sure you're not! Might as well do this!" Bryn grinned and made them both fell on the bed. 

"What the f-" her sentence was finished yet again when he started tickling. "Oh no!! Stop!! Shit!" Maaike laughed and laughed and laughed. She tried to get away but couldn't.

"Oh you are not getting away lass!". They were fully on the bed and he was on top of her. Both of them laughed, playfully fought and truly relaxed together.

Finally they stopped. They lay there, breathing hard, both filled with joy and complete ease. He was still on top of her, his body pinning her down, arms resting at her sides. His head was at her left shoulder.

Her long black hair was messy but so beautiful. Brynjolf couldn't help himself: he raised his left hand up, slowly, barely touching her but clearly making an impact on her: little ticklish touch gave her shivers on her back. Maaike hadn't been so intimate, or close with anyone in a long time.

And she loved every second of it.

Finally, Bryn's hand was able to reach a beautiful ebon lock of hair, and he took it in his palm. Raising his body higher, propping to his right elbow, taking a better position.

Bryn took the lock on his lips, kissed it ever so tenderly and smelled it, like one would do to a rare flower. It made her heart ache with some warm feeling: Pain and crippling sadness.  _Longing?_

He looked down at her, staring right at her icy blue eyes. She returned the eye contact, looking directly into his eyes like she was looking at the sea. Deep greenish blue.. It was like a sparkle, to fires meeting in the middle. No words required. Fire was getting stronger. Just by looking at each others eyes, Brynjolf and Maaike communicated  like never before. They felt like the connection between them was about to grow, get hotter and it was about to explode.

"Maaike, I-"

Door slammed open:"Alright just checkin', you kids done talkin' aye?" 

Maaike and Brynjolf turned their heads at the door, like someone had just thrown cold water on them. 

Delvin's mouth fell open and immediately closed. Without saying a word he closed the door and they could hear his steps when he walked down the hallway. Further and further away from them.

_Fuck._

The heat that had been there just a few minutes before? Gone. They looked at each other. Pure awkwardness in the air. She was red like a tomato. He was almost as red as his hair.

_Fucking awkward. Good going Maaike. Fucking old mother-fucking father-sucking Delvin._

Bryn rose from the bead, walking to the door. He rubbed the back of his neck. "I'll send Sapphire to fetch you some clothes. Then you can go and get some work from Delv and Vex."

Maaike rose to sit on the bed, shifting uncomfortably. "Yeah. Works for me."

"Oh, and lass?" He was just about open the door when he turned to give her a smirk.

"Yeah?"

"If you hear even one sarcastic remark from Delv, and you officially have my permission to shove your dagger horizontally up his ass."

Maaike couldn't help but laugh. "You've got it boss."

He gave her a wicked half smile. "Lot's of eyes are on you lass. Don't disappoint me."

"I won't. Ever." This she said with complete sincerity.

Once more, their eyes met. For a second only, but still. With that he took his leave.

Maaike looked at the closed door. 

_Ever._

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Bryn walked down the hallway.

In his heart there was only one feeling: Unfamiliar need.

In his soul there was only one concern: undone puzzle with a missing piece.

 

In his mind there was on thing:

_She smelled like lavender._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Hopefully you enjoyed. Feel free to give me feedback :) It helps me to improve myself.


	10. Slice of an apple pie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like a wolf, traveling and hunting food for her pack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long!! I've got a lot of studying to do, you know how it is. Hopefully you'll enjoy reading this however. I've been aching to do more of these. Thanks for all the kudos and support :)

Maaike rode her horse along the path. 

_Just remember to take the correct turn to Whiterun..._

It had been a long time since she had been there. After the escape from Helgen, with a blond man (she didn't remember his name) from the stormcloack army, she used a hood and warpaint to cover her face. Even when she didn't know about the "dragon blood" within her, she felt necessary to hide her figure. Maaike felt too 'exposed' while showing her natural self. Ulmer had ruined that for her.

 If anyone would see her now they could not recognize her. 

Could they?

_I doubt it. I did a lot of work in order to stay hidden. Well, I did it better than Blades ever did._

 

She didn't want to be "Maaike the Dragonborn". It was more like a former job, another person. She didn't even use any of the shouts again. More famous she was, more people from her past life would come looking for her. 

After that was done with, she could turn into Maaike again.

Could  _she?_

After killing Alduin (which was no simple feat) she waited for some time. Was it a week? A month? Definitely not a year, but still. Then she woke up, in the middle of a forest, in her bedroll, at her camp.

She felt ready.

Taking the hood of was among the hardest things she had ever had to do. But she succeeded. She found a bond and for the first time in a long time, she looked at herself. 

Maaike was back.

Suddenly Maaike realized where she was now: On her horseback, riding to Whiterun to do a bedlam -and a sweeping job. She had woken up from her memories and daydreaming. 

_Silly me. Fucking silly. It doesn't matter any longer. Let. It. Be._

Maaike patted her horse Monica, who she bought from Riften's stables.

"Lets get this done, eh girl?"

 

 

_***_

 

 

Whiterun hadn't changed much. The same neutral place, where two head families quarreled about politics, companians drink all night and so on. Maaikee almost became a Thane of this hold by Jarl Balgruuf (because of the 'heroics' she had done), but she refused to take it. However she did he did do a favor to her when there was the dragon crisis. After that, she considered it all even.

But even the Jarl didn't know her identity.  _Good man. Didn't insist when I refused to show him my face._

It was evening when she did the jobs. A good opportunity to do jobs: Little bit darker but most people were still working so they wouldn't notice her breaking in their houses.  _'Remember, do to job first, get drunk after.' That's what Vex kept saying. I'll definitely need a drink when this is done._

Well, after it was done she bought some food and drinks, avoiding suspicious looks from the guards, then she chose to leave the city. 

 She could have stayed for a while, but she had some urge to get back home as soon as possible. 

 _Since when had Thieves Guild become home to me? Weird._ With that thought she opened a bottle of wine and drank it down with one gulp.

Maaike walked outside the city gates, only to see something interesting. Olfina Grey-Mane and Jon Battle-Born in a deep discussion. She had once stolen a love letter from Olfina (she had been drunk.) Despite their families feuds, they had fallen in love.

_Idiots. They are still in that secret love affair. Cant' they just get it over with? Ugh. I hate these fucking people. Petty problems are so difficult to handle apparently._

Though in truth, she was a bit jealous.  _Grass is always greener at the other side._

It might have been the alcohol, but she decided to jump in on this matter.  _Fuckin' Love troubles, here I come!_

"Heyyy honey birds." Maaike greeted them with melodic tone.

They both blushed. It kind of annoyed Maaike. 

"W.. what are you talking about?" Jon babbled, poorly acting innocent. Olfina was getting that angry looking stare she often wore.

"Cut the crap. Dragons came back a year ago, I doubt your thing is the most impossible thing to have."

"Why do you care?" Olfina said with bitter tone.

"I don't. You just annoy the shit out of me. Maybe you shouldn't care either. Life is short, so just do what ever you fucking want." With that, she continued walking to the stables, getting Monica from there, mounted her and then get going. Later, she was going to regret what she did and wander why in oblivion she interfered with matters that didn't belong to her or... were tiny as guardsmen's 'manhood'.

_Back to Riften. Back to home._

When Whiterun was out of her view, she looked back and burst into laughter. Monica seemed confused. 

"Oh you should have seen their faces Mon! 'Oh shit she's talkin'! She  _knows_!' Pfft! Who the fuck wouldn't!" Maaike imitated Jon.

"C'mon girl, let's hurry up as far as we can untill complete darkness comes, then we'll set up a camp." She encouraged her horse. 

 

 ***

 

 

Maaike woke up from a good sleep. Out of thirst, perhaps, and took a sitting position on her bedroll. She had seen a dream of sweets. Literally. Apple pies, sweetrolls, honey treats and those delicious snowberry-things. The scent of fresh baked cookies from oven, the ones they make in Cyrodill, made Maaikes mouth wet.

_Shit, now I'm hungry. Why didn't I buy any treats from Hulda? When was the last time I ate something desert-like crap? Do I have even cheese?_

She started to search her pack, but then Mon seemed nervous.  _Could be a couple of wolves._ But that was just it. With her luck, which was practically 'non-existence', it would be something she didn't expect.  _Like on that drunk evening, with the guards._ So instead of searching for treats, she took a dagger from her belt and took a readied position on her feet. 

Quiet moves, looking quickly but not recklessly around herself, seeking a reason for her horse's distress. Campfire was the only light in the darkness, so she had to just listen to her senses. 

"Now its difficult to get a drop on you, huh?" boomed an amused voice.

Maaike swing around to look in the direction where the bragger's words came. She narrowed her eyes to see more clearly into the darkness.

"What the hell Brynjolf!?" Came her repulsive response.

Bryn came closer to her, from the woods, so the campfire's light could reveal him completely. His grin presented how very pleased he was with himself. "You left with such a hurry. Couldn't let you run off so quickly, now could I?" 

_Smug little asshole!_

"Oh  _really?_  " Maaike hissed. She wasn't really a person, who one should wake up from dreaming.

"Really. After all the work I did with your recovery, you just hurried out of our beehive, eager to gather more honey." 

"And you think I can't handle it, or...?" Maaike quipped her eyebrow.

Bryn rolled his eyes, grin bit loosing it's amusement. "I'm fairly certain that Goldenglow proved your capability, otherwise you wouldn't be here." He sighed. "No, I really had just my own business to take care of. After you left, I decided to take care of it earlier than originally discussed. But I did it effectually and since I knew you were on the road as well, I thought I'd like the taste of your company."

"Yes well, how does it taste so far?" she asked, still displeased from her sudden wake-up.

"Bitter-sweet honey, lass." And the grin was back on. He sat near the campfire, on a log. "Now now, I didn't come here to wake you up without any compensation. Sit your luscious pretty little ass down, and let me talk." Bryn tapped the place next to him.

_If he weren't Brynjolf, I might smack him for saying that._

 Maaike hid a grin of her own, sitting down next to him. She watched the weak campfire still bringing light.  _Luckily I used spells._ She said few words, and the fire was roaming up again. "Now, you wanted to say something?"

Brynjolf's mood was relaxed, genuine... Funny how he changed it so suddenly.

"Yes well... Look, we both know that the incident with the guards was just because of the alcohol, so that doesn't count at all nor does it change anything."

"Do we have to talk about _that?"_ She winced a bit.

"Let me finish."

"Fine."

"Usually, I let things be. 'Don't ask, but listen when told'. But I am intrigued by you. You are strong, mysterious... and fucking gorgeous."

"Oh stop it." She gave a laugh.

"Don't say you don't enjoy flattery."

"I didn't say that."

"Bottom line: I want to explore you. After how I heroically saved you, my interest was build up. I don't know. Might have been the adrenaline that made me react so roughly on them. Or it might have been the fact that you have this weird way of affecting all around you. Especially me."

"Wow Bryn. I..." She looked at the fire again, then back at him, a cocksure glimmer in her eyes "...I am quite glamorous, aren't I? Even you, the oh mighty Brynjolf, have fallen to my 'charms' eh?"

"Now don't let it get to your head alright? I want to know you. And when I want something...." he leaned closer, to look into her icy eyes with his sea green ones, and continued with a low tone, "..... I almost need it."

Maaike coughed to clarify her voice. "I can't assure that I'll tell you everything. Gals gotta have some secrets so... I'll tell you shit, if you agree to answer my questions in return. See, my motto is not to give, but to take. Everything else, it's just business. I give you something, you give me something, sounds fair?"

"Aye. A woman after my own heart."

"It's a deal."

"Perfect." Bryn took two wraps from his pocket. "I assume you have some wine?"

"How did you know?"

"You smell like it." It was funny, really. He was close enough to smell everything on her. But the way Maaike drank, it wasn't difficult to comprehend  

"Oh."

"I just thought that this would taste good with wine." He handed her one of the little packages.

Maaike opened it, and there was a slice of a still warm apple pie.

"Bryn. You are my hero!"

"Ah lass. You really are one unique little minx. Shame all people aren't like you."

"How so?"

"Well, you get tired to women and men yelling 'you filthy thief'. Although many women find that term... sexy."

"I bet there are lot's of... those ladies." Maaike rolled her eyes.

"Jealous?"

"No. I prefer men."

"Good." He winked his eye. 

 Maaike just smile and ate to satisfy her need for the sweet taste of sugar.

... More wine wasn't bad either.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and feedback are appreciated. :) Leave kudos if you feel I'm worth it :3


	11. Connected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike and Brynjolf talk. And they finally come together with their bond, which is acknowledged without words... But with a song.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! I used much of my time to do this but I got too ichy so I had to do this chapter! TRUST ME! The end of this chapter is important... ;)
> 
> Enjoy the fluff :D

"So... What do you want to know?" Maaike said after taking sip from her wine. "And 'what's your size' kind of a questions are answered with displeasing actions."

Brynjolf chuckled and watched the midnight sky with thoughtful look. Then he looked at her again. 

"How did you really end up where you are?"

"What do you mean?"

"Lass. I figured you were from Skyrim originally, before you ended up in Cyrodill. You told me that you are a stray kid, and you had a team who were killed by your employee. Then you returned back to Skyrim. Beyond that, I do not know. And we have talked a lot, all considered."

"You mean that I don't really tell anything. Just... Little riddles..." She didn't want to play dumb, so she said how things are.

Brynjolf nodded. 

"I... will tell you. But piece by piece."

"And you decide when it's my turn. Agreed." Reassuring smile crossed his face. 

Maaike dared to look directly at him, though just for a moment. 

"Gods, it's very personal you know? Don't think I'll just start to cry on your shoulder."

"I wouldn't dare." He grinned.

Maaike sighed frustratingly. But relaxed. She told the story of her family. The same story she had told Sapphire. For some reason it seemed more difficult this time. Hunters in Skyrim, living normal life in the woods, the horrible butchering of her father and brothers as well as what was done to her mother. Brynjolf listened. It wasn't that easy. But it didn't hurt so much anymore. 

"He was the one who did this scar on my face." She told him.

" _That's_ how you got it? Insane bastard murders your family, attacks you, and then does that?" 

Maaike nodded. "I managed to kill him but.. it was pure luck. After that it was complete luck again: after days of running I met a Khajiit caravan, traveling to Cyrodill, so I traveled with them. And all that because of some guy had too much skooma."

Brynjolf extended his left hand to cup the right side of her face, rough and strong fingers brushing her black locks to the side, letting his thumb trail her scar from top of eye to top of her lip.

"Dragons I can understand."

_If he only knew how much I understand them..._

"Their purpose is clear. But  _fuckin'_ murderous lunatics? Skooma doesn't create that... He was a monster already." He shook his head. "People are the worst beasts there are." The last phrase he almost spat out. 

_He means it._

Maaike couldn't help herself. She leaned a bit into his hand, it was far too intoxication for her to resist. "Bryn.."

His expression softened. He focused to feel her skin on his hand.

"I think it's fair for you to ask now."

"Yeah well..." for a moment Maaike was deep in thought. "I generally don't believe in fate." _Despite the whole dragonborn thing._ "We decide it for ourselves. But there are times... Ugh. You seem like the type of person who would say 'I was born for this'. And... well..." _  
_

"Relax lass. I understand. You can ask."

"Thanks. I guess I wonder how you really came to this business. Do you feel it's like a fate, did you not have choice or just for fun? What is your reason?"

He took his hand away from her face and placed it on his own lap. For a moment she worried she'd offended him but his expression was full of amusement.

_The bastard is smiling!_

"I'd say it's much more than that. Beyond reasons."

"Cut the philosophical bullshit. Just tell me."

Bryn just laughed at that. "Impatient? Oh very well. Truth is, I didn't care what was the reason."

"...Didn't care?"

"Aye. Ma and Pa had passed so I lived on my own. They had been merchants so I had learned a few things. Stealing was a thrill for me, not just a 'bad habit from unhappy childhood', I really enjoyed it. And coin is a real prize on its own."

_Very true._

"I didn't choose my have fate- no one did. I lived, and what I did was simply meant to be because it has now happened and cannot be changed. That is the key of living: in the moment."

Maaike listened in awe.

"When I met the former guild master, he offered to take me in the thieves guild. So I went with him. There is always a choice, and for me, that was the best possible one I have ever been offered. Coin, thrill and drink." 

She giggled a bit. "That really sounds like you."

"You are here too lass!"

"...And that was the best possible deal I have ever signed... Because of you." She bend her neck to the side.

They both went quiet. She gave him a genuine smile. 

"Well. Ahem. I think this is a great moment for a toast." Brynjolf took new bottles of wine from her pack.

_How many bottles did I buy?_

"For what shall drink for?" Maaike asked and took one of the bottles.

"Coin, thrill and drink." He raised his own drink.

"Agreed. Coin, thrill and drink."

They toasted and drank.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Maaike woke up before Brynjolf. He had taken a spare bedroll from a back on Monica, and was now sleeping a few meters further from her. Surprisingly, she didn't have hangover. And more surprisingly, Brynjolf wasn't sleeping right on her since she slept without the guilds armor, just the thin tunic under it (not even pants, just undergarments).

She shifted and took a sitting position on her bedroll, looking to her side. Even when dreaming, he looked so relaxed and cocksure. Stubble on his face was growing, and his red-brown hair was a real mess.

Maaike couldn't lie. The man was extremely attractive... 

_And damn sexy. So much muscle.. Strength.. Yet not a typical nord-brute. No. He is witty, charismatic, a schemer... A true business man. A real thief. And half naked in his own bedroll.... without shirt... Only those tight leather guild trousers...._

_Shit._ _What's gotten into my stupid head?_

_I really like him!_

She shook her head, then gently stood up. Monica was resting as well. Autumn morning was cold, but Maaike didn't feel like dressing herself up in guild's armor. Not yet.

_There should be a river. I'll go freshen up. Dibella's tits! Hopefully it helps me clear my head._

Without even wearing the shoes, she walked to the woods, over a hill and from there downhill. There was the river. It was a place with a lot of trees. She should be careful: trees allowed her some safety and solitary but it also made sneaking and attacking her by surprise easier for other possible threats.

Carefully she sat on the wet grass, on her knees, right on the edge of the river. She extended herself a bit lower so she could was her face and hands.

_Skyrim... The nature. My only friend along my travels...._

Maaike quietly started to sing the song, she had heard in the taverns she was sometimes forced to visit.

 

_"Our hero, our hero, gains a warrior's heart._

_I'll tell you, I'll tell you, the dragonborn comes._

_With the voice wielding power, of the ancient nord art._

_Believe, believe, the dragonborn comes._

_It's the end to the evil of all Skyrims'  foes._

_Beware, beware, the dragonborn comes._

_For the darkness has passed, and the legend yet grows..._

_You'll know, you'll know, the dragonborn come."_

 

 

Maaike sighed. She stood up and turned around.

Bryn was there behind her, few meters away. Maaike stopped right there, eyes widening a bit. Blush and embarrassment would have been if... if... Brynjolf hadn't seem so...

Content. Gentle. Heartwarming.

The connection, the bond they had sensed last time in his own bedroom (before Delvin came in) was there again.

Without hesitation Brynjolf walked slowly and gently towards her, giving her time to refuse him or discourage him.

But she didn't.

He cupped her face with his hands and pressed his lips upon hers.

She didn't resist.

She wanted it.

A kiss....

_Bryn.._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for the support! Comments, kudos and all support have really cheered me up! :3 Hopefully I'll get more opportunities to write more!


	12. Ownership

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Maaike and Brynjolf discuss the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! I can't believe I finished this. But I did. Hopefully you'll like the chapter. I'll be very busy for the next weeks but I'll see what I can do :) Enjoy my friends!

They settled on the ground Brynjolf on top of Maaike his bare muscled chest pressing her down: Kissing, tasting, hands roaming on each other's body, Bryn's stubble scratching her face...

Sensation was intoxicating, passionate and filled with urge.

His hands were on her waist, while she stroked his ( _now entangled_ ) hair with her own fingers. _Soft... Kind of tickles.._

Maaike tilted her head so she could give him better access to her mouth. Their tongues tasted each other. Occasionally Bryn's rough kisses made her moan softly and she felt some kind of need she hadn't felt in a long time... Maybe this was the first time ever she felt like this. The warmth surging through her.

Brynjolf mumbled against the kisses. Her reaction to his performance made him drunk. Usually with a woman he just made them yell his name. They'd beg him to continue, to do more and he'd gain satisfaction for doing so. He was always in control. And women seemed to love his expertise. But not in this moment. He felt a grave need and Maaike shared it with him: they were melting together.

Then Brynjolf's hands slowly started to wander under her shirt, feeling her skin.

It was then when she sobered from the sensation and tensed. Maaike opened her eyes.  _What the fuck are we doing?_

Bryn noticed this and tried to reassure her with a whisper: "Relax. It's okay lass."

It was a perfect moment, but something was creeping inside of her, bitter tasting ale. Old ale.  _Ruined_ ale. She didn't want to know it nor feel it. Maaike put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him lightly off of her (which was surprisingly soft action, considering she was rough person).

"Brynjolf stop."

For the first time she saw Bryn be taken aback. In this manner anyway. He did raise up a little and put his wight on his elbows. He looked at her with hidden concern as well as with question. 

 "Maaike what is it?"

_Damn him and his puppy eyes._

"Seriously Bryn." Her hands still on his shoulders she pushed him calmly to a sitting position so she'd gain some space to get up. Once she was on her feet, Maaike dared to look him in the eyes.

He frowned. "Seriously what?" Now Bryn was standing as well. 

Maaike didn't want to seem like some girl who turned him down at the last minute just because "lady" doesn't act like it.  She had made clear she was into it and suddenly she wasn't. Maaike felt embarrassed and confused. And disgusted for what ever reason. So much uncertainty..

" _Talk_ to me lass."

She recoiled. "It's... I mean..."  _He is so close._

Brynjolf was only a few feet away. "You've never stumbled on your words, don't start now."

She snorted a bit. 

"Don't tell me it was THAT bad?"

"NO!"

This made him quip his eyebrow.

"Aw shit, I hate these kind of talks."

"You don't say?"

"Yeah. Over dramatic awkwardness with some weird emoti- I mean whatever- kind of talks. Soooo lame."

"Lass. I don't hire you to shut down. You can say what's on your mind." He was serious.

Maaike's turn to sigh. "You want it straight, I'll give it to you. We are members of the fucking Thieves guild. It is highly unprofessional to forget our brains to just let our emotions to get hold of us. It'll be our death."

"That's what this is about? I have no intention to pressure you lass.. Not too much anyway. But there is no reason we can't enjoy each others... company and pleasure. There clearly is some hot spark here. It won't compromise our thinking if we seek mutual release. Living in a moment, seeing where it goes... No strings attached."

"Exactly."

"....uh... What?" It was probably one of the only times when Bryn stumbled on his words.

"I said 'exactly'. Because that's how  **you** do things. Just getting some merriment, no worries and some nice steamy sex. And don't get me wrong. I fucking dislike entanglements. Too messy and it makes people unprofessional. I don't want that. But I don't practice some lazy fucking in the nearest bush like some horny teenager so I could satisfy some 'need'.

A year ago I might have agreed to it. Most likely yes. But now I refuse to take part in some emotionless empty sex where two bodies just hump each other and I am non-existent hollow nowhere to be found when this body is my superiors _pet_. I fucking  **refuse**!" The last part she spat out with a growl. Almost yelling.

_This is not some foolish girl talking about how she isn't ready or she is just being volatile. This is me._

Maaike was breathing hard, eyes closed. She had let a lot of shit out. She might have laughed at the situation, since it changed so quickly.  _Fucking annoying._

 

Brynjolf looked at her with calm face. In some other case, he would have thought the girl was naive or over dramatic. But it definitely wasn't about that. He could hear the pain and uncertainty. There was a story behind this. _  
_

_What's been done to her...?_

 

"Well, what do you think of me now? Not so hot, huh?" Maaike spoke with shaking voice. Eyes still closed, rubbing her forehead. 

Bryn took steps forward, closing distance between them, and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Maaike you don't look any different in my sight. You are still the very same lass. Beautiful woman who belongs to no one. And ... you actually intrigue me even more now."

Maaike looked at him. Her first instinct was to smack him. _DIDN'T LISTEN TO ANYTHING I SAID?????_

But his eyes were sincere. She didn't want relationship or a fling. And yet....

There was something different in his look. Whatever it was, she felt comfort. This contact between their eyes, was so many different things. Unwritten declaration of something neither of them knew of. She looked at him and felt accepted. 

There was deep understanding.

Maaike smiled, only a little. "You.. intrigue me too." It was closest possible thing she could say, yet it meant so much. And it made Bryn smile.

"Gotta admit. This is new to me. Perhaps for both of us."

"I really don't know how to define this shit. What are we doing?"

He quipped his eyebrow. "We don't have to define anything. We can figure it out. Or we don't. But I want to pursue this and that much needs to be said."

Maaike looked at her feet. In silence she gathered her thoughts and breathed deeply, looking up again to Brynjolf's beautiful sea-green eyes.

"Promise me you won't pressure me." She said firmly.

"I won't pressure you. I promise this in the name of my greedy twisted heart." He said equally strong.

She grinned. "Then I want this too."

"Good call."

And they kissed yet again.

  _It's very surprising... How fast things change huh? Damn his puppy eyes._

 

 

 

_***_

 

 

Water was dropping to the pool in the cistern. Waves on the water seemed to cause weird sensation in the atmosphere.

"So... where is Brynjolf?" Rune sat next to Sapphire who was reading some book which she quickly hid.

"Where do you think?" Sapphire rolled her eyes at him.

"I don't know?"

"You  are such a.... Ugh, he went after Maaike."

Rune's eyes widened a bit. He was flustered. "But he said something about a... heist? I dunno."

"....convenient, considering he could have done it anytime but left only when Maaike did." Sapphire added.

"Oh. Oooooh." Realization. He looked at his feet. Then he frowned. "Isn't that bit out of Brynjolf's character? I mean, he could have waited for her to return."

Sapphire looked at Rune. She noted a bit concern. Then she grinned. "Are you jealous?"

"What?! Me?! About-- No!" He blushed. Sapphire found it cute.

"Oh get over it. It's not like you are the only one in the guild who's drooling after her." Now she frowned. "It seems to be a natural reaction to any man in this guild when women come around."

Rune looked her with question- He did not know her story. Grumpiness was usual to all the women in thieves guild: It gave them strength and space.

"You can't blame us now can you? She is quite a view." Thrynn walked to their view. He had been listening.

"I can't blame you for being dim-wits, no." Sapphire responded. Before Thrynn was able to mock her, she stood up and went her own way. 

 

He shook his head and grumpily sat down to the bench opposite to Rune. "Cold-hearted-hagraven....."

Rune quipped his eyebrow. "Don't say you expected something else now. I mean Tonilia, Vex, Sapphire and even Maaike are all... similar."

"Not similar enough apparently." Cynric joined up too.

"What are you on about?" Thrynn asked.

"Oh come now. Even Tonilia wasn't enough to keep Bryn's affection or interest. Besides.... Maaike is new flesh. But he didn't just fuck her. And yet he seems to 'look' very carefully after his beloved protege."

"He didn't fuck her?" 

"Hey! We really shouldn't be talking about this. It's not any of our goddamned business!" Rune blurted out. 

"Oooh. So old Bryn has some competition." Cynric seemed very pleased. He had been prompting him.

"No- I just like Maaike and Brynjolf is second in command. I dislike talking behind their backs." This sounded very dull even for Rune's own ears.

The other two men just looked at him. Then the laughter started.

Rune was confused, untill Thrynn clapped his back. "Don't worry kid, the attraction will pass." he chuckled knowingly.

"..At least when the woman smacks you in the face and embarrasses you in front of the whole goddamn guild." Murmured Thrynn.

This made them all laugh.

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

 Mercer watched them behind his desk.  _Idiots. All of them._ He had considered Brynjolf's reason for going to this trip but was bitterly disappointed. He had expected better from him. Now that his sources confirmed the whole situation, it all started to be very clear.

Everything in this guild was his. Now his second in command was softening- finding some other priorities- which made him unreliable. Even more than before. 

Especially when these "priorities" involved the new dark haired woman. The very thought of her made his throat growl in both hate and craving. He felt thirst he hadn't felt for a long time. 

The new sense of... independence around the guild threatened to jeopardize his ownership. That couldn't be allowed.

His dark eyes watched the bed, which belonged to the dark haired temptress, with icy-blue eyes and purple lips.

_All that is yours... is mine._

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Feel free to give me feedback. Your support always motivates me :) THANK YoU AGAIN!!! :33333


	13. Attached

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Memories. Doubts. Momentary desires. Terror.
> 
> Maaike has a weird habit to be terrorized by people in charge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO sorry to keep you waiting. My examination week is done now, and new term began, allowing me to relax and sit back.
> 
> But I must admit, the warm feedback gave me new kind of inspiration and ache to write. :3
> 
> Some parts were very frustrating to write, so I might have been a bit sloppy. However, I am quite pleased with the outcome.
> 
> Also: This chapter is a bit of everything. Sexiness, Fluffy Bryn, sisterly love, Mercer is an arse and so on.
> 
> Thank you for all of your support :)

_Cool wind brushed her broken body. She felt a shudder along side her spine. Maaike watched surroundings: She was back at Helgen. Why?_

_"..Forget the list! She goes to the block!"_

_She blinked once or twice to see surroundings better. Once her view was clearer, her emotions took hold on her._

_She tried to stare the bitch-of-a-woman, who decided to execute her just because she was there, with bitter hate. Maaike tried, but couldn't. She felt quite relieved actually._

_Death-- Sovengrade--- whatever! She didn't care anymore. Maaike was too tired. She wanted the pain of losing everyone and everything to disappear._

_So even though the captain-bitch was nothing but scum, who didn't care about justice, Maaike didn't spit on her or mock her: She smiled! She might have even thanked her. Death seemed inviting, like a peaceful bed with soft pillows promising good nigh's rest._

_But this time... it would last forever._

_So when it was her turn to be beheaded on a block, Maaike didn't falter: She gracefully laid her neck on to the block, hair brushed to the side. Other people were just some imprecise images._

_"Tsk tsk... You think it'll be that easy?" Came the dark answer._

_Maaike jumped to look at the executioner. But he wasn't there... There was someone else. The peaceful environment became suddenly dark and hollow._

_"U...Ulmer..! You're not supposed to..."_

_"To what? To be here. My love, when you will you learn that you can't hide from me? I'll always find you." Ulmer grabbed handful of her hair and yanked her upwards, on her knees. His eyes were glowing... Those terrible gray eyes._

_"What do you want from me...? Can't you leave me in peace..." her voice was barely louder than a whisper._

_His roaming laughter roomed now everywhere._

_"Know this: I am close. And when you least expect..." He leaned closer, next to her ear. Maaike swallowed._

_"....I'll catch you...."_

_"Don't...." she begged._

_"....And I'll destroy everything in you.."_

_"Please..." she sobbed._

_"....Again."_

_Then she saw it: Alduin in the sky, roaring fire and eating souls of her deceased loved ones: Karl, Antonio, Junior, Foxy....._

_She saw her family being murdered again, blood spilling everywhere._

_"Maaike!!!!!! Help meeee...!!" It was Sapphire, burning and bandits who were not afflicted by the flames just laughed at her and attempted to assault her._

_Maaike tried weakly to escape Ulmers grip, to help Sapphire, but some invisible power kept her in place._

_"Don't touch her!" She cried, but no one heard._

_"What a pity. I thought you wouldn't disappoint me. But as it appears, you are nothing but some weak bitch pet.." said a new voice._

_Maaike's eyes widened. That chuckling...._

_Fingers brushed against her shoulder with mocking tenderness._

_"You'll pay up.... To your masters... eh lass?"_

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

Maaike woke up with a loud gasp, sitting up on her bed. 

"Whoah! Wild dreams, huh? Well that's what you get for drinking those weird 'specialties' served at Bee and Barb", Sapphire noted sarcastically. She was at the food table, eating an apple.

Maaike looked at her. Then vomited in the bucket on her nightstand.  _Convenient._ It was mixture of disgust from last night's drinking and horror from her dream. 

"Fucking hell... Worst. Fucking. Wake up. Ever... I'll never eat nuts again... They don't seem to... digest... that well." She gurgled.

"....And there goes my breakfast plans." Sapphire sniffed at her apple and threw it away.

"I'll never drink again..." Maaike murmured.

"Sure, and I'm the Jarl of Whiterun."

"Shut up."

"Did I hurt you feelings?"

"No, you are _hurting_ my head. Hangover, remember?" 

 "Oh."

 Maaike looked at her own vomit in the bucket. It was more pleasant sight than her nightmare.  _Oh shit._ Only the thought of it made her throw up again. Seeing past wasn't as horrible, not even seeing Ulmer, but seeing the people, of whom she cared about at the present, suffer was dreadful to put it lightly. And not only that... But seeing Brynjolf taking the form of her greatest fear...

_Brynjolf... The same as Ulmer..?_

She shuddered.  _Ugh.... Let. It. Be. It is all just big bullshit... Yeah.._

"You alright?" Sapphire asked.

Maaike looked at her.  _Yeah, Sapphire is fine... no worries._ "I'm good, considering my current activity."

She nodded and brought Maaike a tankard filled with water. "So...." Sapphire cleared her throat and sat down on the bed, beside Maaike.

"So....?" Maaike quipped her eyebrow.

"You and our Brynjolf...."

"Umm.... What...?"

"Do not act as if you were unaware!" Sapphire grinned.

"Seriously, we are not talking about this."  _Especially after my dream._

"We are not giggling and gossiping like little girls. I'm just curious. We saw you come back to the guild together, before you went drinking yesterday. So what's this about?"

Maaike thought about the little moment they shared together, at the stream. It made her blush but it was also comforting. It was not everyday you get a chance to make out with a handsome, muscular and mischievous thief.

"Well... He is rather good-looking isn't he?" Maaike half-smiled.

"I knew it! Let me know if that oaf does something stupid... I'll help you kill him."

"I'll let you know." They both laughed together. She was still disturbed by her dream but, more or less, it was getting easier.  _It's good to have people to trust on. I almost forgot how it was like._

"Oh by the way, check in with Delv. He has some extra jobs to offer. Not very exciting but the coin is good."

"Awesome. I'll just clean up and get going." Maaike stood up stretched a little, since her muscles were sore. "Speaking of which, have you seen Brynjolf? He wasn't at the bee and barb last night."

"Yeah, when you two returned, Mercer had some extra errands stored for Bryn. It kept him busy. Funny though..."

"What?"

Sapphire looked around and leaned closer so no one else would hear: "Boss seemed.... grumpier than usual."

"Isn't that part of his nature?"

"Yeah, but Bryn has always been his.... 'favorite'.  Maybe it's because he is the only one who doesn't royally piss him off but there you have it..."

This made Maaike feel unease. Had Brynjolf done something? Or has she done something, and now Mercer is taking it on Bryn?

"Perhaps it's just the weird shit that has been happening lately? I mean the Goldenglow, the rival guild... Maybe there is more? And it's wearing on our boss?"  _Well that's weird perspective. Concern for our boss. Wonder of wonders._

It certainly was strange. Sapphire quipped her shoulders with unconcerned expression. "Regardless, it's not really our business. Better to let it be."

Maaike chuckled. "That's what I keep telling myself. Maybe someday it'll work."

With that she rose up and started to look for clean clothing. 

"Uh, hey Sapphire?"

"Yeah?"

"Is there any place, where I could take a bath?"

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 _Fucking of course._   _Late-fucking-autumn, and I bathe in a lake.... This is so much worse than the stream!_

Maaike had circled around Lake Honrich only to find semi-private area. It would have been perfect, but the bears seemed to run everywhere. On the bright side, she had taken Monica with her. The horse would alert her if the bears would choose to return.

She quickly dove into the water. Icy cold but it felt cleansing. Shivers drove nightmares away. It was perfect. 

"Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuuuuuuuck it's cold!!!"

...Almost perfect.

After getting used to the coldness, she swam to the shore, taking special-made soap from a satchel: Lavender and honey. Maaike rarely had the luxury to use such a things, but this morning felt like one of those days. 

_Shit, it's almost ending.... Where, in all of Skyrim, would I find proper soap?_

Maaike rolled her eyes. Cyrodill had it's bad sides but soap and treats made it all worthwhile.

_And my team._

Shaking all thoughts away, she washed herself as quickly as possible: cool wind brushed her and she was already freezing. She rubbed soap on her naked skin, which had tiny scars, few burned marks and tiny tattoos on her sides and lower stomach.

Maaike looked at herself. Her body... When was the last time she needed just... to  _feel_ something? Her hand tenderly brushed her stomach, from there it wondered lower.

She thought of the moment between her and Brynjolf: His touch have been stout, yet soft. If her hand were his.... lowering, getting to her inner-

 _No. Shit!_ Before, she had been freezing. Now the heat was rising up.  _Gotta finish up, and leave._

Quickly, Maaike washed off the soap and got to the shore, drying herself with spells. It had been a long time since her hair been taken care of so well.

After that, she started dressing up.

 _Why is everything so difficult to get on, when you have recently washed yourself???_ She had only managed to put on undergarments and a thin tunic (without too much trouble), but the tight leather trousers were trickier.

 Suddenly, Monica seemed restless. She moved and twisted her ears back. 

Without thinking or getting her pants on, Maaike grabbed her dagger, got on her feet and turned around.There were trees, bigger stones... Good hiding places for an enemy.

_But... How could anyone sneak so close...._

Maaike sneaked quietly forward, behind the trees. No one was there... Yet Monica seemed even more nervous.  _What's-_

"Never leave your back unsecured. With such careless and arrogant attitude, I'm surprised you're still alive", came the low grumble behind her.

Before Maaike had anytime to react, she was pushed against a tree and the man grabbed her wrist, twisting it behind her back. She let out a painful cry, only to feel the man's breath on her ear.

She twisted her head to the side, to see her captor: It made her widen her eyes.

_Mercer...??!_

She knew what kind of people were in the guild: especially those in charge. But she hadn't done anything!

"Boss, what is-" Maaike tried to say, but Mercer interrupted. His dark eyes looked directly into hers. 

"I do not know, what you are up to. But what I do know, is that you are nothing, compered to me."

Mercer took a break, before continuing.

"You've completed your jobs with such loud charade, it's almost painful." He growled.

"Please, I'm sorry if I-"

"Silence." One sharp, dangerously low word, and yet it stabbed her pride, as if a worm had bested her in battle.

Maaike bit her lip. There was something about him she couldn't quite catch.  _What the fuck is going on??_

She tried to look away but Mercer let go of her hand, turned her over and pressed her even tighter against the tree with his body. With that, he grabbed her chin forcing her too look him in the eyes, yet again.

"You are nothing but a puppet. You hear me? You follow orders, and bow to your betters. Do not even suggest, ever, in any circumstance, that you'd be even slightly above that. And I don't take any resistance. Not even from your special Brynjolf, you hear me? Not. Any. Resistance."

 _This is it... Something going to happen._ Maaike feared already the worst. Shivers ran all over her body. Not the good kind.

Maaike simply nodded. "Yes boss."

Mercer's frown got some weird depth to it. "You are not telling us everything. There is something about you. Something that might effect the guild. And do not pretend: I'm the leader of the thieves guild for a reason. I see through you, no matter how hard you try to hide..."

_Is... is he going to..??_

"It would be pointless to try to dig up things about you, even though I could. But do ANYTHING, even a little unconvinience, and I won't hesitate to show what I'm capable of."

She swallowed hard: Not only to get the words out of her, but to keep certain **shouts**  in. "Yes... sir." 

Mercer didn't let go of her chin, but took a little inch back, yet didn't go too far. His eyes roamed over her body. Only now, did Maaike remember she wasn't properly dressed: Only in her undergarments and a thin tunic.

The shame made her blush and to look down. Not only was she forced to kiss her 'superiors' boots like a sniveling dog, she was also half naked.

Mercer came closer again, pressing his face onto her hair: He actually  _smelled_ her hair. Deeply and loudly. Maaike forcefully closed her eyes. 

"Does Brynjolf like  _that_ scent?" He snorted. With that, he let her go, and left.

Maaike was frozen to her place, and after he was gone for certain she fell on her knees. She had sworn never to use shouts again. Today, it was a close call.

_I've got just some fucking luck. Does all in the fucking guild think me and Bryn are involved?? Well the mother-fucking Mercer does..._

One thing was clear though: She couldn't tell Brynjolf.

 

 

 

***

 

 

Maaike returned to the cistern. Her mind was roaming with thoughts, doubts and memories. She went to the dining table, and took some mead.

_Shit shit shit. Why can't things go smoothly, just this once?_

Considering her situation, it was surprising she wasn't going insane. Yet.

"Lass, you're shaking. Are you okay?" asked the voice next to her. Only now did she see Brynjolf.

"Oh, I, uhh, sure. How are you? I mean why do you ask? Not that I'm trying to be rude-"

"Whoah, hold just a moment. Since when have you rambled?"

"Since this morning apparently." Maaike shook her head.  _Get it fucking straight!_

Brynjolf frowned. "Is it bad?"

"I've have worse hangovers if that's what you are asking."

"Lass."

"Fine!" Maaike took a deep breath. She obviously couldn't tell everything but a bit of truth wouldn't hurt, would it? "Did you know that our dear comrades are gossiping about you and me?"

He quipped his eyebrow. "They are a curious bunch. And you are kind of center of attention, you know."

"I can handle curiosity. But... If there is something to be... had with you and me, whatever that would be, I don't want it to be the fucking head news of the goddamned thieves guild."

"Yeah, I got that." He massaged his forehead with his fingertips. "Don't worry lass. I'll figure something out", he said reassuringly.

"Thanks Bryn. I appreciate it." She smiled.

 

Maaike's genuine smile made Brynjolf hold his breath for a moment. Funny how such cold eyes could make man's head so hot.

"You are welcome beautiful. Anyway, I did have something I wanted to discuss with ya. More serious issue."

"Oh? I'm all ears."

"After you did the golden glow job, Maven has been busy. She was quite impressed by your handiwork."

"I'm uncertain if I should be flattered or disturbed."

"Maybe both. But nevertheless, she asked to see you. By name." This was the part when they were silent for a moment. Brynjolf looked at Maaike's impression. 

"Oh shit." Maaike finally said.

It was serious matter, otherwise Brynjolf would have chuckled to her reaction. "I don't think this is like that. If she'd want you dead, you would be dead. Though I advise you to watch your language... and tone."

Strangely, that didn't ease Maaike.

_What's wrong with her?_

"Then what is this about?"

"I rather let it be between you and Maven. Just... Do us a favor and represent us well. She is important business partner, and very serious one. So be sharp out there."

 

 _Oh Goody._ "Understood Brynjolf. I will be strictly professional."

"Good. I count on you lass. Now get going. She is not patient type."

Maaike stood up and was about to leave but Brynjolf stopped her by putting his hand on her shoulder and whispered: "After you are done, meet me at the stables?"

Unlike Mercer's, Brynjolf was very tender yet firm. Maaike simply grinned at him and went on her way. "For the record, I always watch my language and tone of voice!" She yelled over her shoulder.

When she was out of Brynjolf's view, she allowed herself to think on what she had just heard.

_Mercer wanted to threatened me and suddenly Maven wants to see me? Am I a threat to him? Either he is paranoid.... Or there is more going on._

 

 

 

 ***

 

 

 

"So you are the one Brynjolf sent? You don't look much to me." Maven sneered at her.

It wasn't the first time, Maaike had dealt with pompous bitches, and certainly not the first time when the bitch happened to be powerful.

"I am here for business. So let us skip this conversation and get right onto the point", she said with stern yet calm voice.

Maven sized her up and down. "Finally Brynjolf send me someone with business sense as well as backbone. I thought you were running some beggars guild down there. Now, say, do I recall seeing you once before?"

Maaike quipped her eyebrow. She knew Maven through reputation, though her face seemed familiar. Surely she would remember meeting member of the Black-Briar family?

"Perhaps", she simply stated.

The head of the Black-Briar family narrowed her eyes. "Ah, now it is clear. Only your outfit was different. Tell me, how did you manage to escape the Thalmor embassy after causing such a mess? Elenwen was most.... displeased from such measures."

Maaike was almost taken aback. Luckily she knew better than to show weakness. 

_THE FUCKING THALMOR PARTY!!!!! FUCK YOU DELPHINE!!!!! FUCK IT! ONLY TIME I DIDN'T WEAR A MASK OR HELMET AND IT COMES BACK, BITING ME RIGHT IN THE ASS!!_

"I have my ways, otherwise I wouldn't be here."

"Then we'll see if you'll expertise can be of any use to me." _  
_

Maven explained that there was a rival in Whiterun, whom she required out of the game. Her contact would provide Maaike with details. She was to leave as soon as possible. It was weird setup.

" Do **not** fail me or you'll face the consequences, especially now that I know of your special little situation."

Maaike could not hold her tongue. She had to prompt her. "Enlighten me further."

The woman's face angry frown deepened (if that was even possible). "You are either bold or foolish. Allow me to make it clear to you then."

She straightened on her chair. "I'd sent you to Elenwen herself, leave you at her doorstep, then you'd be tortured, interrogated and killed slowly. And I'd do it with clear conscience. Does that trouble you? Good. Think on that when you fail."

Maaike thought of her answer. Not only was she pressured by Mercer Frey, but now Maven Black-Briar as well. Only way to go through with it, was not to show weakness, but to show strenght.

So she half-smiled.

"Quite the opposite, Lady Black-Briar. I'm quite pleased. I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Do not mock me."

"I don't. Know that I take my work very seriously. Deadly." Maaike looked straight into Maven's eyes, never faltering.  _I sound masochistic._

It was surprising to see the "lady Black-Briar" hold back her venomous tongue. Instead, she seemed quite... Pleased? Approving?

"Good. Off you go. I grow tired of your presence. Leave and don't waste my time."

Maaike nodded and left. She had a nagging feeling, she had impressed Maven.

Though... She was uncertain if Mercer would like that.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Brynjolf waited Maaike at the stables, patting her horse. Not only was he worried, but he was also anxious to get this over with. He half-smiled when Maaike finally arrived.

"Hey handsome. What brought you to a place like this?" Maaike said teasingly.

He chuckled, looking at her figure. "Can't guy just admire the sights?" 

"Depends. What do you think of it?" She came closer, her body almost touching his.

"I think I could get lost." It sounded as if he just admitted a secret. Though he meant it.

Maaike cupped his chin, fingers feeling his skin. "I like your stubble, you know."

"Of course you do." He grinned mischievously.

"...Like many other women, I'm certain."

"Well too bad for them, eh?" Before she was able to ask more, Brynjolf crashed his lips on hers, his tongue fiercely licking her mouth, sucking, tasting, asking for entrance. 

And oh boy, she had to allow it. His hands were firmly on her waist, while her hand grabbed the front of his leather armor. There was heat, need desire: Weird craving what she had felt that morning in the water. His stubble scratched her, but in the good way. They barely breathed between the passionate kissing.

_Too bad for them, definitely._

"AHEM." Said the stable master. Apparently, they were too noisy with their moans.

They laughed as if they were children. Then they both took a step backwards.

"I assume you are going soon away again?" He asked when they were no longer out of breath.

"Yes. Though I think I'll quickly go to the cistern and flagon, get supplies and see if there is any other jobs available."

"Sounds good. I'd offer to come with you but Mercer has me on a job. We'll see each other later."

Maaike nodded. "Sounds perfect." _Though this thing about Mercer is still disturbing._

Bryn grinned and gave her last parting kiss, then saddled his horse and got on his way. He was quick like that.

She smiled and patted Monica for a moment. "Wait... there is something attached to the saddle.."

Maaike wen't closer. Then she smiled. Then she chuckled. "He is  _such_ a softie!"

Brynjolf had left her flowers on Monica's saddle! Actual flowers!

_Lavender... That's my favorite._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Support is welcome and appreciated. :) Hopefully you enjoyed reading! <3
> 
> Thank you all!


	14. Name to The Horse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whiterun awaits!
> 
> Cynric is more fun than Maaike originally thought.
> 
> Still, difficulties await.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dislike writing a story where is more narrating than actual dialogue. Story looses it's lightheartedness, you know? Surprisingly I am glad how this chapter came out.
> 
> Feel free to leave me tips! :) And sorry it took so long :X Enjoy!

"Well _Delv,_ I'm broke. You have anything for me?" Maaike sat down on a chair around the table, so she'd have full view of him.

Vex was buying drinks from Vekel. "Here he goes again..:"

"Oh I've got things alright'..." Delvin chuckled with his husky voice. 

"Don't even go there, old man. Or perhaps you will loose those... valuable things you have." Maaike snorted, but hid her smile. She was getting more and more comfortable with others. It wasn't such a bad thing to have a  _real_ team again. Only company she had shared had been animals or the Blades. It was a comfort. 

"Fine fine, have your way honey, 'been hearing you're taken anyway. Your loss then."

"Aww poor me." Maaike grinned. "Anyhow, I'm heading up to Whiterun. Do you guys have anything for me to do, out there?"

Delvin scraped his stubble. "Well now that you've mentioned it-"

"We already gave plenty of our Whiterun marks for Cynric." Vex said and sat down next to her. "We could give you more to do, or you could try to share the jobs Endell has."

Maaike drank from her tankard. "Is he even still here?" _Hopefully not. I do not know Cynric that well. Could be worse lecher than Delvin!_

"Yeah, still here." Cynric Endell  _himself_ said behind her.

_Why, almost always, does the unpleasant news come from behind??_

"You heard what we talked about I take it? No need to explain it again?" Vex spoke out.

"Loud and clear. I see no harm in company. Just don't get in my way, whatever you decide." He murmured.

" _Excuse_ me?"  _I? On HIS way?_ Maaike turned around on her chair, to look Cynric. "You should be more concerned of yourself. I can watch my own ass."

"Well, if I had yours I'd do that too." He grinned under his hood.

Vex snorted. "You've been waiting to use that one."

"Maaike did set herself up." Vekel noted.

"Shut up. I'll take few more jobs and then get going. My horse is at the stables. You better have one too,  _Ric._ "

"Pardon?" He was baffled. No one had called him that. Not in his adulthood anyway.

"You heard me. If you are this slow, then be careful or you'll be ran over." With that, Maaike stood up, took details from Vex and left for the stables.

 

Cynric watched her go. He was bit amused. Like were all the others.

"Is she always this cocky?"

"Yep." Stated Vekel while cleaning up their table.

"She'd kick you arse. Hell, I'd let her kick mine." Murmured the old Delvin.

Vex simply snorted with disgusted tone.

"Say what you what," Tonilia murmured from her seat ,"but you know that only one type of people can survive in our line of work."

Mood suddenly became sullen. 

"Well, I'll get going. Otherwise.. I'm pretty sure she'll gut me." Cynric uttered. He threw Vekel few coins as a tip, and got going. He was feeling generous, plus he'd steal more soon enough.

People who remained quietly drank down their drinks.

 

 

***

 

 

Trip to Whiterun had been pleasant enough. Cynric was a quiet man, yet not awkward. Just what Maaike had hoped for.

They stopped only a few times to tend their horses or to kill beast on the road. She was surprised and slightly amused, when she witnessed his 'friendship' with his own horse. It was very unexpected.

He talked to his horse, or well, whispered, as if they were gossiping together. Man who were rough around the edges yet not overly bubbling with savage emotions, were one of a kind. When he fed his horse an apple, Maaike couldn't help herself:

She giggled.

Cynric quipped his eyebrow. "Did you just... Giggle?" 

Maaike coughed, clearing her voice. "Me? What? No!" She tried to hold back rest of the laughing.

The man looked at his horse with confusion, but chose not to pursue the discussion further.

Night was coming, and they could almost see Whiterun. Maaike patted Monica, encouraging.

  _Not a much left girl. Soon you'll be able to rest._ To her surprise (yet again) it seemed Cynric was saying the same thing to his own steed.

"What's his name?" Maaike asked.  _Got to have some story there!_

Cynric calmy looked at her. "What makes you think he has a name?"

"Oh come on, I saw the apple!" She was teased him, trying to hurt his manly pride, though she failed.

He just grinned at that and then chuckled. "Apples."

"What?"

"My horse. His name is Apples."

"Wait.... Did I hear right?"

"Yes?"

That made her snicker. " _You,_ named your horse Apples?!"  _  
_

He snorted a bit. "He is faithful one. Only companion I ever needed, or had. So I figured he deserves a name. Plus, he likes apples."

Maaike laughed herself to tears. "How poetic! Cynric and his apples!"

"Yeah, that joke died young."

"Yes, well, I personally stick to more mundane names. This gal here is Monica", she said through her laughter. It was starting to calm down.

"Did you just pick the name, or is there a story?"

That had her actually silenced a bit. Cynric frowned.

"No, there is no  _story._ "

"But there is someone?" It was as he said. Maaike's expression told that much.

"Yeah... There _was_."

 

They were quiet, until they reached Whiterun stables. 

"So what's the idea?" Cynric got off Apples and left it to the stable master's care and Maaike did the same. He tossed him coins, to ensure horses comfort.

They started to walk the walkway to the city, lowering their voices but acting casual to avoid attention. 

"I'll need to take care of this important job for Maven. Better to just get it over with."

"Sounds good. I, on the other hand, will finish these jobs I singed on. Do you want me to leave you some?"

"I really don't know how long this will take, but if I'm not at the inn by midnight, feel free to do them. Otherwise, it'd be nice to sharpen my skills. Sounds good enough?"

"Good enough. Have fun with the job."

Maaike grinned. "I certainly will."

After entering the city, they separated.

_This is going to be a real fucking piece of work. I just know it._

 

 

 

****

 

 

_That mother fucking, father sucking, bastard._

Maven's contact Mallus, had been a real  _dickhead._ Not only was he smug but lying-piece-of-trash! He had given her a simple sounding job, which sounded too good to be true. Maven needed this rival to be taken care of so she had bitterly agreed.

Well. It had been too good to be true. 

She was to poison mead, what Maven's rival was about to serve. To do that she'd have to kill skeevers, go through tunnel that led to the meadery. Little did she know, there was a maniac with extremely poisonous pet-skeevers. 

_Ugh. Rats are cute if not too vicious. Skeevers? Rotting ugly beasts._

 Maaike used her magic to lower his guard: He managed to throw lightning at her, causing her skin to burn up a bit. As repayment she throw her dagger at his gut: Fire enchantment burned his insides. She offered him a courtesy of ending his slow death with quick strike to the head.

When the whole scheme had been done, rival arrested for impure mead since rat-poison was extremely strong kick Maaike moved to the next objective. As a professional thief she did have she had to: took the evidence of the rivals dealings and resources. And it was done.

"Pleasure working with you!" Mallus simply chirped. He seemed quite happy, that Maaike hadn't mentioned the life threatening encounter she'd faced. 

"Well, now that's out of the way..." She purred. It caught his interest. 

"Yes, my dear...?" Low, seducing tone.

She leaned in closer, over the counter, finger implying for him to come closer. So he did.  _Men are stupid._

With low deep voice she whispered to his ears, making him shiver: "There is something wet on my thighs..."

"Why don't you show me...?" He grinned.

"I'd rather make you feel it..." Maaike's right hand reached to the back of his head.

"Oh? What is it then.." Mallus was about to kiss her ear, when she rolled aside, her hand grabbing fistful of his hair, and smashed Mallus face roughly against the wooden counter. She swore she heard few bones crack. He simply screamed, trying to wiggle free.

"It's fucking blood from a skeever bite which, by the way, poisoned me. And funny thing! This skeever was commanded by a crazy guy who you-" another strong smash against the counter, "-forgot to mention!"

Mallus gurgled blood, so she decided this to be was enough. Maaike pushed him onto the floor and left the meadery, slamming the door behind her.

_Can't you find honest criminal anywhere these days?_

 

 

"So how did it go?" 

Maaike sat down to a chair opposite to Cynric. She rolled her eyes. "You have no idea Ric."

Table between them had bit food and drinks, which the fellow male thief had bought... Or stolen. She did a few jobs he had left for her, and now it was really dark already. All shops had been closed for a few hours already.

They had plenty of time. So she told him of the glorious venture she just went through. She spared no detail.

"-And then I smashed his face on the counter."

He chuckled. "Bet the poor bastard is crying on the ground somewhere."

"Serves him right."

"What if he tells Maven? There is possibility she won't appreciate this course of action."

She smiled wickedly. "I have something in my sleeves. Been planning for it the whole day. Last year I spend in Skyrim wasn't for nothing. I have a huge perk: information. And I have something what she might not need but something that she might want. Something that will come in handy. I'll just have to make a few stops on our way back to Riften."

"And that is?"

"Improving her position, power, you name it."

"...more specific answer?"

Maaike just grinned. "Girls tricks will always be secret to others. It's how we survive."

"I see." Ric simply smiled under his hood. It was a small gesture, but considering his personality you could say he showed her mutual respect, if not friendship.

They enjoyed their drinks and freshly baked bread. Warm and smoky fire relaxed the whole atmosphere. 

"-Just wait and I'll conquer you like a nord warrior conquers a mighty beast!"

Maaike's eyes turned.  _What the hell?_ Her expression turned into a frown.

The bard, had his arm around a lady from one of the market stalls. They sat around the fire, on a bench. She was trying to wriggle away, but the bard was stronger and intoxicated with alcohol. 

"To oblivion with you! Only thing I care for is my daughter. I have no interest to share anything with you, so leave me be Mikael." The woman hissed.

Cynric wasn't paying attention, until he saw Maaike's stiff posture. He looked at the situation with interest.

Mikael, the bard, just laughed and roughened his hold on her. "Ahh Carlotta... You may not know yet but you want me..." then he clearly whispered something vile to her ear; Carlotta looked shocked, terrified even.

Cynric shook his head: "What an idiot. Am I right?" He turned his gaze back to Maaike, but she wasn't there. She had moved behind Mikael.

"Ahem." 

Carlotta and Mikael both turned to see who was behind them: Carlotta's gaze was fearful while Mikael was deeply angry and displeased.

"What?" He grunted.

"Hands. Off."

"Excuse me?"

"I've already smashed one man's face today. I have no problem doing it again."

Cynric got up, readying himself. He had no doubt Maaike would back her talk.

Poor stupid Mikael didn't know this however: He simply laughed.

"I am keeping company to a lady. Is that so bad?"

Maaike looked into Carlotta's eyes: They begged for help. There was no doubt in her mind.

"This is the last warning. Get. Off. Now."

"Oh come now, go find your own piece of meat, this widow is mine-"

 

The word rang in her head.

_Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine._

_Whores like you can only do one thing... Beg. Serves you right my dirty little whore... MINE._

Next thing she knew, was Mikael screaming while she threw his back against the wall. "I fucking warned you." She ran to him and punched him various of times. 

 

 "She is not  **yours**!" Maaike hissed, smashing his face onto the floor. It would leave a bloody mark. Mikael gurgled blood. 

"Enough!" Cynric placed his hand roughly on her shoulder. "We need to leave. Now."

Maaike was about to argue, but saw how others were looking. Carlotta was shocked. Of course she was. The barmaid couldn't move, neither did the other customers. She looked down. Mikael was crying, his eyes swollen, few teeth broken and nose almost completely smashed.

"Please... I'll never... On my honor, Carlotta won't have to worry about me.... ever again...."

She let go of his hair, standing up straight. "You better do that." Maaike was about to leave, but turned her gaze upon Carlotta. The woman simply nodded. Maaike was uncertain if it was out of appreciation or fear. 

The idea sickened her. 

"Yeah... we better leave.. before the guards come in."

 

 

Once Whiterun was far away, behind them, was Cynric able to talk.

"What the hell was that?"

She frowned. "You honestly think I want to talk about it?"

"Yeah? Well think about that next time you beat someone's face in! You almost killed him!"

"For fucking hell, do you think I would talk to  _you_ about it?" It came out more insultingly than she had intended.

"Perhaps not. I don't care either way, but the our bosses do." He grunted.

Realization came to her. Mercer had harassed her once already. This might caught unwanted attention, free-time or not.  _Dibella's tits. The man is going to kill me._ And Brynjolf.... She sincerely hoped he wouldn't care... or hear about this. Though that seemed unlikely.

Cynric sighed. "If they ask me, I'll say you simply got into a bar fight, while bit drunk. Nothing life-threatening ever happened: the bard was simply a weak milk-drinker. That will keep them off your back."

 

Maaike's mouth opened with surprised gasp. He would do that? It would be a huge favor! She realized that if it weren't for Ric, her time in the thieves guild might be over. Or worse, considering Mercer's threats. She might still get some lecturing but her ground was covered.

"Thank you. Really. Not only for.. covering me but also for stopping me." Her voice was soft.

He shook his head. "Just don't do stupid things like that. Trust me. It won't end well."

Maaike nodded.

Rest of the travel, they moved in silence.

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

"This tells me nothing. Do you know this symbol? It doesn't tell me anything!" Maven Black-Briar murmured angrily. She continued to rant some details, which Maaike barely cared enough to hear.

"I've seen the symbol before. We are investigating on it and sooner or later, we will find the one responsible for aiding your rival." Maaike answered coolly. 

 "I know one thing: Whoever did this, is going to regret starting a war with me. Well, you've done me a service regardless. I'm sure you'll find this most satisfying." She gave Maaike satchel filled with coins. Very _h_ _eavy_  satchel.

"Thank you m'lady. Though, I have something else for you, what you are going to find most... satisfactory." Maaike took a papers from her pockets and handed them over to the Black-Briar.

 First Maven seemed displeased: she expected this to be some useless bit of idle boot licking. Money or property. But she read the notes. Probably because she seemed to like Maaike.

Then her facial expression seemed to change notably. "Now now... Where ever did you gather these?"

"You have your sources... I have mine."

"What makes you think these will be any use for me?" Her voice was sharp, unforgiving.

"Well... You can always sell them. There must be many people wanting those. And I didn't leave any tracks behind me, so those strategic plans are not going to be changed. They are valid for the next six months. Or... Well... Hypothetically speaking, if those plans were to be sent for General Tullius, he'd be able to take Riften from the stormcloacks. And, if I am not mistaken, that would make you our Jarl." 

Maven was silent. Then laughed, as a pleased person would. Though there was that superior and low tone to it. "You, my dear, are more clever than I thought. Maaike, was it?"

"Yes my lady."

"You know how to pick your allies, though it requires no intelligence to know my influence. But you are proven to be most profitable to deal with. And I certainly won't give you up to the Thalmor as powerful as they might be in gratitude. It would fade eventually. No... I'd rather keep you on my side."

That was exactly what Maaike had aimed for.  _Success!_ "I look forward to it. We shall see what we can accomplish. I am at your disposal."

"And I shall find a way to repay you. I hate to be indebted. And because I am generous, I will not simply say I will keep Thalmor off your back... No... I will get you something." Maven half-smiled. 

_An actual smile? Perhaps gods have not forsaken me._

 

 

Maaike nodded with pleased smile of her own, and took her leave. 

She was going to report back to Mercer but he wasn't at the cistern. Honestly, she was glad he wasn't there.

_I must speak to Brynjolf. About... something._

Assault by the guards, her attachment to Brynjolf, harassment by Mercer and her beating up an useless bard? Things were a fuss. And talking to him calmed things. She had agreed to tell him about herself, if he agreed to answer to her questions in return... Now he would definitely get something.

After thinking, she found a perfect topic.

It was late, so nobody probably was at the bar. Maaike went to knock the door to Brynjolf's room.

_I can't believe I am doing this..._

Brynjolf opened. Her heart skipped a beat. His hair was tangled and his eyes were tired. He was always like this, after calculating. There was no doubt: She needed him. The ache within her... the sadness.. He had a way of making things more lighthearted. 

His face brightened when he saw her, giving that cocky half-grin she found so damn sexy. And before she knew it, she threw her hands around his neck and pulled him down to kiss her. 

Whatever he was going to say, was muffled. He simply but his hands on her lower back, pressing her against him. Their tongues slipped inside of each others mouths. She gasped against his kisses and he in return gave out a low grunt. 

Passionate kisses left them both breathless, when they finally stopped. Brynjolf chuckled.

"Well well lass. Did you miss me?"

"Arse." 

"Arse-kisser."

Maaike laughed at that. "You got me there."

They took little bit space, but Maaike's hands rested on his shoulders and his own were on her waist.

"How did the job go?"

"Seriously? Sure, I succeeded, but is that the thing on your mind right now? I'd frankly talk about something else." Maaike grinned.

He chuckled yet again. "Very well. We'll discuss guild related matters in the morning. Now, what do you have in mind?"

"I have a story for you.."

"Oh? Is it a dirty story?"

"I'm sorry, I thought you wanted to know more about me. My mistake." Maaike tilted her head, teasingly.

"In so many different ways sweetheart. Anyhow, joking aside. You've piqued my interest. Tell me."

She bit her lower lip.  They went inside his room and sat on the bed. He watched her closely.

When Maaike had gathered her courage, she was finally able to look into his sea-blue eyes.

"I want to tell you about Monica."

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my friends :333


	15. Rotten Apples

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike tries to give little bit of her story to Brynjolf.
> 
> But much more than she expected, came out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! I did it. o_o Sorry for the wait. I, yet again, must say tell you how my school has been keeping me busy. Regardless, yet another exam week is done and this term is going to be quite easy on me so...
> 
> I'll keep writing!
> 
> Enjoy this... uhh... Bryn x Maaike moment?

 

"Monica? You wish to talk about your horse?" 

Maaike rolled her eyes at Brynjolf. "Do you want me to tell something of myself or not?" 

"Yes, sure-"

"Then let me talk. It has a story to it."

He closed his mouth, and took a neutral gaze at her. Then he nodded.

Maaike sighed heavily. And started remembering.

"I was uh... 14 or 15 at the time. I had been thieving and doing hunting jobs but it really wasn't working out so well. I kept getting caught and then I wasn't hired so much. Anyhow, this one time I had to lay low, so no walking around the most public market stalls, right? So I stayed near stables, beside the horses: Place smelled like shit so it didn't draw much attention. There were a lot of apples though, so I ate 'em. Of course, they were all rotten and shit but I was too hungry." Maaike shivered. "Couldn't eat apples for a long time after that stomach ache."

"I can imagine."

"Yes, well then I saw- Well heard actually- this girl yelling curses at some fancy looking guy. She was around the same age as me. I stood up to see what the fuss was about, but I didn't drop my apples from my arms."

 

_"YOU MOTHER-FUCKING FATHER-SUCKING SHIT-EATING... ARSE-FACED SCUM-BAG! You think you can do whatever you want? Huh?!" The redheaded breton girl yelled at this imperial dude. He just sneered at her. Only clear thing I can remember about him, was that he had very big nose._

_"On the contrary. I do whatever is rightfully on my authority to do. You are the one who has violated the regulations of your... stature."_

_"I'll have you know that I am not some boot-kissing servant you ugly ass HORKER. You owe me."_

_It was quite intriguing show. Shame I had just the apples as snack._

_Imperial guy put his hands on his waist. "Just step out of my way **lowlife** , for I am not a patient man and I can still call the guards."_

_And then she snapped. Hit the guy right up to his nose. He squealed like a sissy noble he was! The foul-mouthed girl seemed proud of her deed, until the dagger came up. I knew what was going to happen next- Nothing pretty. I looked around, not many people were around, which was surprising but it would be only a matter of time when the guards came buy and they would not care to help a poor girl over a noble._

_You see, back then I had some naive sense of... dignity I suppose, so I threw one of the rotten apples at him. You should have seen it! His face was priceless. The girl shifted to watch me and I will never forget that grin. She came nearer and took one apple from me._

_"Hey, I'm eating those!"_

_"You... You filthy.... peasants!!! You dared to... throw at me with an apple?!  You disgusting mongrels!"_

_Me and the girl changed gazes. Then we started together throwing apples at him. It was fun, the way he tried to cover himself and his squeal!! We laughed, got more apples and continued. It was hilarious._

_Of course it had to end sometime. Guards showed up. Noble started yelling at them about how we thugs tried to rob him and then assaulted him. No chance they were going to listen our side of the story, not that it would change anything. Stature difference, you know? So we simply started running, guards on our trail, yelling us to halt._

_"Fuck! Quickly, follow me! This way!" I followed her, trying not to fall 'cause I was laughing so hard. She knew the city very well, so we found a nice hiding spot where the guards couldn't find us.... in a barrel._

_"Sorry for wasting your food." She whispered._

_"Yes well... He deserved it. And I wouldn't eat anything that has touched HIM even slightly... I have standards, you know!"_

_We both giggled._

_"What's your name?" She offered me her hand._

_"Maaike. Yours?" I took it._

_"Monica, the ass-kicking adventurer, nice to meet ya."_

 

"From there on, we were together. Monica taught me how to hunt and sneak properly, she was undoubtedly better than my own parents. She also showed me how to pickpocket and kill humans quickly."

"I take it she was the one who taught you your language?"

Maaike chuckled. "Actually, yes. She said it would be a crime against humanity to suppress words of 'our emotions and colorful individuality', as she liked to put it."

Brynjolf smiled. "She sounds like a colorful lass herself."

Her smile faded a pit, but not completely. "Yeah. She was." Maaike looked down at the floor.

Brynjolf put his hand around her, tugging her closer. He wasn't going to say he was sorry, sense it  was a bit too sweet already, for both of their tastes, but they both tried. This kind of forward closeness- in all it's seriousness- wasn't something they were use to. Yet, it wasn't awkward. Strange, but not uncomfortable.

 

Maaike sighed and took some place, turning to look him in the eyes again. "She was with me, to the bitter end. Monica died with the rest of the crew because of my.. grave mistake.."

Brynjolf set some pieces together. "Your former employer? The one you escaped from?"

" _Ulmer_ ", she hissed with disgust and turned away again, "that bastard's name was Ulmer." 

The redheaded nord sized her: She had deep bitterness and anger within her, which was meant for someone specific. He of all people knew that feeling.

"You said before... You don't want to go after him, even if he was alive, which is understandable..." Maaike was silent so Brynjolf swallowed and continued "...But we both know you are not the one to let a slaughterfish free after it has bitten you."

 

"Yeah... I am not that type."

"Then why." It wasn't a command. More likely it was a concern, and Maaike took it as such. She had come to him right? He hadn't waved her off. She could trust him.

 Maaike stood up from the bed, and took a bottle of ale from a table. Her back was to him. She didn't want to look him in the eyes when she told this. It would sound ridiculous. 'Opening up' like people called it was kind of...  _icky. And_   _lame_.

 

"Because it was all my fault."

Brynjolf frowned. "Lass?"

"My mistake ensured their deaths. I wasn't careful or... something. It was my choice to work for him, even when we all had a inch he was bad news." It pained her to talk, but she continued. "What he did to me, those _horrible_ things, I feel like... I deserved them.. In the end, I survived and they didn't! I have no need for revenge... Because if I did, I would probably kill myself first! And the hypocritical bitch that I am, I'm too coward to do the justice-" 

"Lass, where the hell is this coming from? What in oblivion are you on about!" Brynjolf stood up, grabbed her shoulders and turned her around. She was fighting tears.  _What the fuck did this guy do to her?!_

In the beginning, she was controlled by self-loathing. Why she? The pain had been unbearable. In a way, she had blamed her teammates, even Monica, for it. For her  _own bloody mistake._  She faced the rape, the torture. 'It should have been someone else' she had raged on. But that horrible thought... changed within her. It was all her fault. And she deserved worse. _  
_

"I continue doing careless mistakes, without thinking... I just snap and.. make things difficult for others." Maaike referred to Cynric, and how he kind helped her out, reassuring she wouldn't be in trouble. "Monica... She died because of this. Because of  _me._ And I have learned nothing. I deserve worse than I got-"

"Lass, you are panicking! Breathe! I do not want pick my thieves off of my floor!" His sea-colored eyes were encouraging and pleading. Maaike hadn't even noticed how she was out of breathe.. she needed air. Strong palms on her shoulders offered her support. 

Maaike couldn't calm herself, so she started rambling. "I do not want to hurt you guys... especially not you, as stupid, girly and naive as that sounds I-"

Brynjolf pulled her in a hug and hussed her. "It's alright. We'll manage it together." He wanted to know more, but frankly the only thing he currently cared about was to help her: To assure her well-being. There was so much hurt within her... Not some little girl worries, which are let out to the first person who is nice to them, but real trauma that has hardy nord men crying like milk-drinkers. His grip tightened a bit:  _I will help her._

 

Her breathing calmed in the warm embrace. She didn't cry, almost never did. Maaike brought her hands around him, pressing her head against his strong chest. Strong, safe and secure.

They stood there for a while. Not talking, just being in each others arms. Maaike felt the unsaid words between them: It was alright to be in this position. Even if they had known each other for a short time there still seemed to be something. It was a silent understanding.

"Lass, Maaike?" He said with low and husky tone.

"Yeah?" She murmured against his chest.

"Tell me what to do."

She looked at him. He asked her? The cocky scoundrel wanted to help her out. Maaike couldn't help but smile. 

"Get some food, I'm fucking starving."

He grinned. "Can do."

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

"...How, in the hell, can she eat more than fuckin' Dirge would stuff in a month?" Delvin shook his head.

Brynjolf drank his mead, raising his eyebrow in question. 

"Do not look at me! I ate whatever I could find in Cyrodil, rotten food included. When I started making some coin, I also started to store some food: Decided I prefer real meat and sweetrolls over butterflies and bugs." Maaike said after finishing her fifth apple pie. Before that of course, she had finished a haunch of horker meat.

"Yeah? How can you stay in that fit then? Since you were in Skyrim for a year already and ate like that for how long?" Sapphire noted. Ragged flagon was merely empty, only Brynjolf, Sapphire, Delvin, Maaike and Vekel occupying it.

"Well I preferred to stay in the woods, only went to the cities when absolutely necessary. So... If food was out I hunted or ate something less appetizing. That, and all the fighting kept me in shape. Plus, tasting ingredients developed my... um... alchemy skills, if you can believe it."

"No! Really?" Sapphire frowned.

"That's... actually pretty accurate." Vekel noted.

Others turned to watch him. He simply shrugged. "What?"

"You'll give me a goddamn headache Vekel! You're tellin' me, that you of all folk, ate blasted torchbugs?" Delvin murmured, rubbing his head.

"Not... torchbugs."

"No, wait, lemme guess. Bees?"

"Shut up."

 

Others just chuckled. Even Maaike, which make Brynjolf glad: His lass wasn't going to stay depressed and stressed all the time. It was good. She deserved some rest.

When others left, Maaike and Brynjolf were left alone. They sat around this small table, talking and drinking. But now that they where alone, Maaike needed to open her thoughts for him. Even with things calming down, she had this worrying side to her.

_Here goes nothing._

"Listen Bryn, I need to tell you something."

"What's on your mind lass?"

"I... guess I want to say thank you. For earlier. I truly appreciate it. And I hope you don't... I mean.." she sighed "...see me as someone weaker or lesser-"

"No." It was sharp and honest. Never had he used more serious tone. Maaike smiled. 

"Thank you. For that."

He grinned. "Anytime. For you." His hand reached out over the table, to brush his knuckles on her cheek. "I've always liked you hair, you know?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It reminds me of ebony." Then his fingers reached to her hear, to touch one of the dark, straight locks. He watched it, feeling her scent.

Maaike felt heat rising in her chest, creating a smoky feeling on her face. Fingers and toes curled, biting her lip. When his sincere and strangely bright eyes finally returned to hers, her heart stopped. 

Bryn talked again, voice lower and huskier than before. "However does your eyes have such icy beauty?"

She gave out a little laugh. "Trying to butter me up? Are we changing compliments now?" 

"No. I am appreciating you. A real good fortune diamond...."

They both leaned forward, to meet each others lips. Luckily the table was so small enough for them to meet each other's kiss in the middle, without reaching or just getting up. 

Maaike placed her hands on his hair, feeling the bit curly and strong locks. His stubble scratched her face when they tasted each other. The sensation made her spine feel hot and cold at the same time. It felt good. His hands on her back, gripping her armor. 

 

"Bryn.." She muttered against the kisses. He licked a bit her lower lip, then she opened up more. 

"Maaike.. You-" He spoke between the kisses, but was interrupted when a glass fell on the floor and shattered. It woke them up from this frenzy. He grinned. 

"We should probably go to sleep before we brake anything else, huh?"

Maaike chuckled. "Vekel could clean it up."

She giggled, but leaned back, separating from him. They rose up from their chairs and just when she was about leave, Brynjolf pulled her into one short kiss. Then, when they were pressed against each other Brynjolf took the serious and quiet posture again. 

Cupping her cheek he spoke again. "Maaike. You didn't deserve it." His eyes explained and proved his words- The connection didn't leave.

She winced. But the pain... felt also like relief. As if an arrow had been pulled out of her.  _You didn't... I didn't deserve it..._ It was the best thing she had ever heard. Only thing she was able to do, was to kiss him again. So simply, but so strong!

Brynjolf gave a half-smile. "Good night, my little hawk." 

"Good night... Smart-ass."

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

Next day she spent the morning 'reporting' her activities to Brynjolf about her mission in Whiterun. It was clear now the person behind the scheme at Goldenglow and Whiterun was the same person or organization. Regardless, it was trouble.

Maaike was relieved: Mercer wasn't currently there, otherwise she might have had to tell her findings to him too. She was still shaken by him. After what he did, threatening her in such manner, she felt complete disgust against him. Which was unfortunate, since he was her boss. 

Part of her, some weird sense of instinct wanted to tell  Brynjolf. But she was tired of getting other people trouble on her behalf. She would prove herself to Mercer, and surely he would see reason. Not that she cared for his approval.

Maaike went to Flagon. Vekel was displeased: He was cleaning the mess on the floor, while Tonilia scolded him. 

She innocently took another bottle of ale and drank it down. There was some talking behind her. Dirge riling up. 

"You there." 

 _I remember that voice._ She turned around.  _Yep, non-other than the hard-ass Maul, Maven's own personal rear-guard._

"Me? Here?" She sarcastically noted.

"Not here for games. Maven sent you this. Wanted me to deliver it, so it would get to you as soon as possible without interruptions." He handed her an envelope. 

"I see. Well do have nice afternoon sunshine." She murmured as he took his leave.

"Well well, what did you get?" Vex asked with bored tone.

Maaike frowned and opened the envelope. 

"Hey lass what are you-"

"Shh!" Maaike raised her finger to shush Bryn. She kept reading and then gave out a laugh. "I don't believe it!"

"What?" He frowned.

"Maven gave me a house!"

Silence.

Then all the others dropped their jaws on the ground.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Honeyside manor. It was beautiful, with a little balcony to the lake. Her own house. Decorated and everything. And she wasn't even a Thane or official citizen of Riften.

_Good to have friends in high places._

Perfect location, peaceful... and most importantly, her on privacy. There was some details to take care of, of course. As simply as she had been in her lifetime, she would want her first very own house to be.... well.. hers. 

Perhaps some randomly painted pots? 

She sighed and fell to the bed.

Brynjolf had smiled at her.  _'You earned this'_  , he said. 

_I am going to like it here. A real house since childhood._

For a moment, she felt as if Monica had smiled at her. It had been a long time since she had felt so content. 

_My house. My friends. My life._

Maaike sighed.

_My home._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Hopefully you enjoyed :3
> 
> If you have some feedback, feel free to write. (y)


	16. Love awaits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike wasn't expecting any of these things to happen: At least not in the same day!
> 
> Luckily, there is a friends to help her out. Once more, she has discovered loyalty.
> 
> An this loyalty... Helps her go forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! I've got it. When I first started writing this chapter, I thought, "What the hell am I doing." But now... Nah. I feel content. 
> 
> Hopefully you'll enjoy it! <3 Thank you for all the kudos!
> 
> P.S I left something for you, at the end of the chapter. ;)

 

 

Maaike couldn't remember when was the last time she had slept so well. Since she got her house, her own soft bed with firm lock on the doors, and the guild's members at her back, things seemed to find the right direction. 

Soon enough, when Maaike had moved in, Imperials were able capture the Rift, because of some 'mysterious source'. The Jarl of Riften was replaced by Maven Black-Briar. And she was most pleased though she hid it well.

She spent the next weeks riding to various of holds, taking care of jobs. Sometimes few other members of the guild chose to tag along with her. Sapphire was obviously relaxing to travel with, Rune apparently had a crush on her (poor sod) and Ric was just there with Apples and apples. 

_Funny._

Brynjolf was busy, thanks to Mercer (the greasy big), but they got always a few moments for each other, usually at the Flagon. They talked, but respected each other's privacy. Brynjolf  didn't bring up what Maaike had told him, and she appreciated it.

_For a smooth-talking rogue, he is quite genuine._

Instead, they had shared some funny stories, adventures and... well.. gotten to know each other. 

He had told her how he use to steal apple pies, as a young lad, before joining the guild. And then his ma would try to scold, yet feel too bad and try to bake better ones herself. 

Cute? No, apparently there was a reason his mother rarely cooked.

Bryn wasn't all about 'mystery' even if he didn't show his cards. His actions showed his personality more than others believed. Though he said she was the only one who saw it, but he might have been referring to the flowers he'd always steal for her when they met. Such a romantic!

_And his grin is just- shit, I am not thinking about it._

Bottom line, things were good. No failed jobs so no trouble from Mercer. 

 

 

But still, best thing was the well rested nights. Every time she had a chance to sleep on her own bed (especially after a very drunk night) things were less... annoying.

 _UGH! My fucking head is about to explode all over my goddamned wallpaper!_  

...But still annoying.

Maaike looked around. Her house seemed... clean. Few bottles there and there.  _This is the last fucking time I'll go drinking with Vex._ She took some healing potion from her nightstand (she learned to be prepared) and got up. 

_Looks promising so far... No buckets filled with vomit. But wait- What the...._

"...Why is there a dead skeever at my fireplace?" It was all burnt up. She rolled her eyes.  _I'll clean it up later._

After dressing up on her basic guild armor, she went outside, to her balcony. It was a beautiful early-winter morning. Water was inviting, but not enough to make Maaike dive in to a freezing-cold-piss, as lovely as it might look.

She breathed the fresh and crispy air. Lovely. For once, she didn't have to think and worry.

Her skills had improved. Sneaking, awerness and basic instincts. Just in case Mercer planned on a new 'surprise'.

Though she had to admit. It wasn't just hangover: There was something in the air. Hopefully nothing. 

_But when it ever has been?_

Last sigh, then she chose it was time to get to work. Perhaps she might steal a glimpse of Brynjolf later on, when he'd return from his heist.

 

 

 

 

 ***

 

 

 

 

"Well well Finally you bother to show yourself around here! How did last night go?" Unsurprisingly, Sapphire was waiting for her at the secret entrys' ladder in the flagon.

Maaike rolled her eyes, walking away from the ladder. "Regretting it already..." _So-not-amused._

"Which? Showing yourself around here, or last night?"

"Both. Anyway job is a job, yeah?"

Sapphire chuckled. "Funny you should mention that. Delv has something big to offer. And before you make any stupid remark, I am talking about a job."

"I would be worried if you were talking about anything else. The old man has proposed to me like five times this week alone. Creepy."

"That's him alright. Still, he wanted to personally offer this job to you before anyone else."

Maaike put her hand on her hip. Now this had piqued her interest. "What kind of business is this?"

Sapphire shrugged casually, raising a tankard to her lips. "Don't know. He wouldn't say. Just said you might have opinion about it."

"Well I'd better get going then. If there is room for company, wanna join?"

She grinned. "Never miss it."

 

 

Maaike was about to head to the Flagon but turned around. "Any word from- You know."

"Nope. Bryn said the job might take awhile." Sapphire frowned.

"What is it?"

"Nothing, really. It's just... The sudden load of work, which keeps many guild members away, is very... Weird. Cistern has been very empty lately. If I didn't know any better I'd say there is something going on. But the jobs are so insignificant in value and have no real alternative goals, so it makes me wonder." 

Maaike gave a frown of her own. That did sound suspicious. Almost as if... someone wanted to keep members away. Was Mercer doing this out of spite? Was he aware of her relationship with Brynjolf? Or was there something else going on.

Sapphire shrugged. "Maybe I am overthinking it. It's probably a coincidence. Like Vex says, plain old bad luck."

Maaike nodded slowly. "Regardless, thanks for the chat. I've gotta go see Delvin. The old man will die of old age if I don't go get the job soon."

 Sapphire waved her off, and she took her leave, with new things to think about. 

 

 

And, yet again, she was stopped. Someone yelled for you. "Hey! Maaike is it! I need to talk to you."

It was a new voice, but oddly familiar.  _New member perhaps?_

"Yeah, I am Maaike. What do you want? No offense, I kind of busy." She didn't want to be rude, but she was eager to get the job.

"Do not worry. This will just take a moment."

"Okay, go ahead."

"I don't know if you remember me.... If I had known you were here, I would have returned sooner from my longer lasting assignment."

Maaike narrowed her eyes. "You are right. I do not know you. Though I admit, you look familiar.."

"I am Etienne Rarnis. You saved me from the Thalmor Embassy. You didn't have to save me so... Thank you. I will never forget what you did for me."

She was taken aback.  _Him!_ She had completely forgotten. The tortured man, who she couldn't leave him behind to those monstrous Thalmor. 

"I.... Thanks. If you are in gratitude though... I must ask you for a favor."

"Anything!"

She looked around, then took a step forward and whispered. "Tell no one of me. Understand? That life I lived when I saved you? I must leave it behind. Please. Do not tell others." There was a bit desperation in her voice. This crap had to say in the past.

He smiled. "Do not worry, your secret is safe with me."

She smiled with relief. "Thank you. I'll see you around."

 

 

She finally arrived to the flagon. She greeted Vekel with a nod, and he pointed out Delvin who was once more hitting on Vex.

Poorly.

"-Now get out of my way!" Vex stormed off, leaving Delvin dumbfounded. Maaike barely dodged. Sometimes Vex, and her arrogant behavior, got on her nerves. Not that she could blame her too much. Putting up with Delvin and hangover, was almost impossible.

She chuckled. "Trouble?" 

"Nah, she'll soften up someday." He sat down on a chair, bit smugly, hiding his shame.

"Uh huh." Maaike quipped her eyebrow.

"Are you here for work, or just spreadin' bad morale?"

"As fun as the latter is, I'm here for the special job you've got. So, what's so important you'll only inform me first?" Maaike sat down on a chair, opposite him. 

"Well, this one is important. Succeed and we'll gain more influence within different holds."

Maaike grinned. She had developed some kind of loyalty to the guild. Of course she'd like to get this one. "Sounds like a golden opportunity"

"Yeah well, it's bit more complicated." Normally, some other man would've rubbed his neck at this point: There was something in his voice. Nervousness? Regardless, Delvin kept his professional cool.

"A rival guild has been setting roots in Skyrim. Guild called Summerset Shadows. They've been careless, giving thieves a bad name by murdering their marks. We don't want people thinking that's our way. It's bad for business."

She sensed where this was going. "I see. They need to be taught a lesson, and you want me to handle it?"

Delvin went quiet for a moment, Then he leaned forward. "Look, there is more to it than that. Normally, if you were some other thieving turd around here, I wouldn't even consider offering this to you. But you've gotten shit done, so I'm not only offering it to ya, I am handlin' it to you on a bloody silver plate."

Maaike frowned in confusion.

_Seriously, what the hell._

"Well that's sweet and all, but seriously Delvin... Just fucking spit it out."

He growled. "They are the sons of bitches who got those 'guards' after ya."

 

Silence. Maaike gritted her teeth, her hands forming fists.  _Those men? THOSE men?_ _  
_

The men who kicked her to the ground, like a dog. The men who smelled like garlic and skooma? The men who tried to have their way with her. The men who shamed her and made her feel weak.

The men were sent by  _these motherfuckers._

Delvin looked at her expression, however he didn't dare to look  _into_ it. It wasn't unprofessional outrage, no. She seemed calm and... cool like wind on a mountain... which can freeze you to death. Her light-blue eyes rarely looked so cold. 

He coughed. Uneasiness was in the air. "This job is important, not only for our reputation but for our influence. Since you have personal beef with them, I figured you'd want to teach them their a lesson, get some scores settled and make profit for the guild while doing so. Everybody wins. What do you say? Wanna take care of this?"

Maaike was, in some weird-ass way, touched by this. She knew how much people detested getting things personal, yet Delvin made an exception for her.

Though that feeling was mostly buried under the thirst for payback. Weirdly, there was this new-found excitement for it. Not grudge, but some bitter enjoyment in the fact she could, like Delvin said, settle scores. And not only that.... she was allowed to  _hunt._   Shame Brynjolf wasn't here. He might want to join her. But that wasn't going to bother her. 

_I'm so fucking going to kill those useless ass-faces._

Maaike gave a mischievious half-smile. She leaned closer to him, not much, bur a little.

With a sweet voice, she spoke out her words: "I would be  _fucking delighted._ " 

Delvin had held his breath. Now he was able to let it out. "We have a contact in Windhelm: Torsten Cruel-Sea. He'll point you the way. You know what to do. Enjoy."

"Oh I will."

 

She got up and went to the cistern, not even paying attention to Vekel who had a worried glimpse in his eyes. Sapphire was still there.

"Leaving already? Damn, you must have gotten something good." She immediately saw Maaikes' expression.

"They found 'em. The bastards who attacked me after the estate. I am going to take them down." She growled. Then looked at Sapphire. "Wanna join?"

"With pleasure."

 

 

 

 ***

 

 

 

"Did Nirayne give you the location?" Sapphire asked. She had been waiting for her near the Candleheart hall, after they found out Nirayne had information of their prays whereabouts.

"Yep. Took just a few words, and she broke." More specifically, she had given her a warning. Once. That was enough. "I think we got a new fence now."

"That's good. More people, more goods, more coin. Guys at the guild will be pleased."

Maaike rolled her eyes. "That's good, but now I wanna kick some ass. Lets go."

"Suits me."

They decided to leave their horses at the stables. Surprisingly, the hideout weren't too far away, and they didn't their horses to get harmed. Well, at least Maaike didn't want to. She patted Monica for a time, then they left. There was snow everywhere, and night was closing in. It would actually be benefit for them. Still, Maaike wanted to make them feel... beaten. It would require more than some quick arrow to the back.

_They will fucking get it. Right up to their ugly faces._

"I know that look. Calm down. Unless you, of course, wish to have so many wrinkles at your nostrils."

Maaike woke up from her thoughts. "Huh?"

"Seriously. We are gonna get them. Let's not be foolish, and we'll get them just the way you want to. Trust me. I know thing or two about killing." 

"Yeah. Thanks. I appreciate it."

Sapphire nudged her with her elbow. "Well, now that we are here, and we do have some time...."

".....Yes...?"

"How is Brynjolf?" Sapphire had this smug look.

Maaike was taken aback, mouth falling open.  "Uh, what?" 

She rolled eyes and grinned. "Again with the 'obliviousness'! Seriously. How good is Brynjolf? He must be quite ... ahem.. stout and sturdy." 

She never expected Sapphire to ask that, or well.. not now. "Saph! No! I mean, I don't know-"

"WAIT! Hold on." She stopped, and grabbed Maaikes' shoulder. "You two haven't....?"

"No! We have not. What does it matter??" Now she had this whole blush on her face.

 

 

Sapphire looked as if someone had kicked her to the groin. Then she laughed and clapped.

"What???? Seriously, spit it out."

She barely got words out. But then she calmed a bit. "Congratulations Maaike. You officially are quite the catch."

Now Maaike was dumbfounded. "Uhh... Thanks, but how so...?"

"Oh come now! What were the first things you thought to be his qualities, when you met him?"

She thought about it. Then found her voice again. "He was uh... cocky, smooth, handsome (of course) and a ladies man- Oh." Realization. Here it was.

"It's difficult enough to think about him in a relationship... which is still beyond me... but to think you two haven't even slept together? Well done. He is hooked in a courtship!."

"Or maybe I am." She sighed. "Look, sis. I've gotta be honest with you. I have thought about it, I really have and it must me in his mind too but..."

_.....Dibellas' ass. Am I really going to have THIS conversation?_

Strangely enough, Sapphire listened. "But?"

"...Last time it happened.... Let's just say it was not..." Maaike swallowed. Sapphire, of all people, would understand. And she did. More words were not required to explain. The look they changed, told everything.

"I guess I'm afraid of what it'll feel like. I don't want such a good thing to feel...."

"Wrong." 

Maaike nodded. "Yes."

Sapphire sighed. "Look. I am not going to give you the shit 'time will heal all wounds' because waiting for that moment, is as hopeless as waiting for rain come down at some dessert. What happened, hurts like hell. It will never disappear from history.

But know this: It doesn't mean you are not allowed happiness. When you feel it's right, it is right and you can enjoy it. Just because there is hurt, doesn't mean there won't be any relief. We'll be here. Especially Brynjolf. He cares for you and clearly is here for you. So how about we go and kill those sons of bitches up there and show we are the winners?"

Maaike was astonished. Sapphires' words gave her some odd peace in her heart. It awakened passion, over the cold and emotionless depression. She smiled.

"Works for me. And... Thanks."

She just nodded for her. "You helped me with... you know. I see no problem in... trying. Now, this girl-crap is making me ill. Let's move on before I puke."

"Agreed."

 

 

 

 

 They crouched. Luckily there was so much snow  to hide behind. 

_Campfire. Three people. Half-asleep._

Maaike readied her bow and motioned Sapphire to move. It was almost natural kind of communication. Automatically they knew what to do.

Sapphire nodded and sneaked closer, always stopping for a moment to find some cover. Then, intentionally, made a noise. It caught those idiots off-guard: One of them fell backwards from his sitting position.

_Dumb fucks._

They started to search for them, more confused than a duck that was just smart enough to see it's reflection in the water and be frightened of it.

  _Such disorganized amateurs._  

When one of these idiots, came close to Sapphire and was about to see her, Maaike shot her arrow right between his eyes. He fell down immediately. Not understanding the danger, the other guy run to his fallen comrade, only to be stabbed by Sapphire. 

The last guy tried to engage with Saph but Maaike was quicker: Her arrow pierced his neck, making him gurgle and choke in his own blood. Sapphire kicked him to the ground. Soon enough he was death.

"Rookies."

"Kind of disappointing. Hopefully the ones inside are a challenge." Maaike readied her ebony sword. It was new. 

And it ached for blood. 

"With our luck? They'll be more than that. At least the leader."

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Sapphire slashed down the last unlucky thief, who had been holding his entrails inside his stomach. Surprisingly cleanly. 

Maaike felt satisfaction with every kill, like a drop of fine wine with every conquered enemy. As sick as many saw that, she had cold intrigues within her.

Linwe, The guild leader was raging at her feet. Her determination didn't allow anyone to stand in her way. 

"You bitches have no idea what you just did! I have power! CONTACTS! Kill me and they'll come after you...!"

Maaike shared amused grin with Sapphire. "To think, he his their leader! This sniveling father-sucking dick-face? Pfft!" She got the her feet and grabbed his collar. "Look you asshole. You messed with wrong people. And your kind of fool is easily replaced by someone better. Oh wait! You're the leader. You should be the best. Tsk tsk. No one is coming for you, cause there is nothing to sent."

Bitterly, Linwe couldn't answer.

"That's what I thought."

With that she cut his throat. Satisfying.

"These seem to be their flags. Wanna send them stronger message? Burn them down." Sapphire said, while cleaning his own daggers.

"Works for me." Maaike readied her fire spell, and simply watched as those bastards guild was burned to the ashes. Fire was really elegant tool. 

 

 

After they got outside, they talked again, inhaling the fresh air.

"That was... quite easy."

"Don't say you are not happy!"

"Oh quite the opposite." Maaike grinned and streched a bit.

"Still, considering how bad luck guild has been having lately, it's as if this went too smoothly, don't you think?"

"Come now! Why would we need luck? We have our skill! You worry too m-", before Maaike was able to finish her sentence, she hear a great and too familiar roar in the air. Close.

She looked around, paling and getting annoyed. She had spend entire year doing all she could to defeat these assholes, and they always came back to bite her ass. 

_Oh shit oh shit! Really Akatosh??!! FUCKING REALLY?!?!?_

"Uhh, Maaike? What was that?"

"Get to the cover!"

"Why? There is no one-"

"TO THE COVER!" she yelled.

Luckily there were huge rocks nearby.  _Luckily._  They went behind them.

"I still don't-" Sapphire was interrupted by the burst of fire from the huge dragons' mouth. It was incredibly fast, and strong. Even it's wings created noise.

Maaike looked around. Too bad she had left the sword Blades gave her to Delphine. It would really be of use now, but ebony was sturdy enough.

"It's a dragon. We cannot outrun it, and I think it has it's eyes on us. He will wait until we come out of our cover." She sighed. "We have no choice. It must be killed."

"How do you even kill a blasted dragon?! It's suicide."

"Please, you need to trust me; It's the only way."

Sapphire looked into Maaikes' pleading eyes. She became frustrated but agreed. "Fine. What do you suggest?"

Maaike took off her bow and arrows, offering them to Sapphire. "Do not engage close-up fighting, just cover me. And never stop shooting."

"But how about-"

Before Sapphire could finish, Maaike came out of the cover. The Green-skinned Blood Dragon was hovering over them. It was waiting to strike. Maaike readied her sword and fire spell: It would swoop down soon, and try to snatch her.

Sapphire cursed and started shooting. Maaike worried for her, but knew the dragon was here for her: For the mortal, who killed Alduin.

She stood there, right in the open. 

"Come at me you bastard son of Akatosh!" She yelled deep from her throat.  _This better work._

" _AUS Dovahkiin!!!_ " It shouted with it's ancient tongue. It dived down, opening it's mouth like a hawk trying to catch a mouse.

 _But I am no_ _mouse._

With quick movement, just before it was able to grab her, she moved to the side slashed her ebony blade to its side, cutting a deep, long wound. Dragon roared in anger, unable to raise up to the sky again: it smashed to the ground leaving kind of a 'trench' behind it. Power from this was overwhelming. Maaike readied herself.

Dragon roared in anger. It steadied itself, turning its' evil eyes onto her. " _Faas Dovah._ " It was drying to scare her. Yet again, it tried to shout fire at her, but this time, Maaike chose to do so first.

" _Yol Toor Shul!_ " Fire breath was overwhelming: She hadn't shouted for a while, because she chose not to. Now, it was inevitable. The familiar feeling of freedom as well as power made her dragon blood bubble within her. The dragon was for a little moment, unable to do anything offensive. It was a dragon, who was ignorant to her power, most importantly, ignorant to her experience.

Adrenaline mixed with instinct, were given control. She ran to the up to the beats slashing it with her sword right to the face, then jumping on its' head. It was difficult to stay there, while it struggled but after killing ten dragon, people tend to learn how to balance themselves.

Both hands on the shaft part of the sword, the edge right at the top of the dragons' head, Maaike used her weight to push the blade through the skull.

"Take this, you arrogant son of bitch!"

To be honest, she wasn't sure if it was going to work. But the new sword didn't betray her. It sank through the scales like a knife through a beef. Dragon fell to the ground, giving one more twitch, then becoming completely motionless.

Maaike jumped off, pulling her sword out of its' skull, then closing her eyes. It was happening again. She readied herself for the burning fire, when the soul would enter her and become part of her, like stormy wind she was forced to swallow.

She had almost forgotten how it was like. The warmth in her fingers, the burning fulfillment within her chest, mind opening up to the whole idea and understanding of life and it's beyond: Things she never could explain in this tongue.

 

 

Then she opened her eyes, and turned around.

Sapphire was there, behind her astonished. Otherwise her expression was difficult to read. Was it fear? Wonder? Mistrust? Maaike had no idea what would happend next. 

"So... Surprise! I am the Dragonborn! Funny how these things go!" That's literally only thing that she could say.

Sapphire looked at her. Deep in thought. Silence was a bit awkward. Maaike rubbed her neck.

"You and I are going to have a long long talk."

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

"So did I get this straight.... You came to Skyrim, and soon after you found out you were the Dragonborn, and you decided to keep that as a secret, went around Skyrim to find out what it meant, found people who knew some shit, raided the Thalmor embassy, discovered some ancient prophecy about the end times and some huge-ass dragon who was going to do it, but found an elder scroll to learn a shout to defeat him and used it to kill him in Sovngarde?"

"Yep, that's about it."

"Wow. Talk about past..."

"Yeah well... I didn't want it. I escaped my old life. I wanted a build a new one. Then poof! Nope! The Dick Divines had chosen otherwise."

"Wait, you raided Thalmor embassy? Is that how Etienne knows you? I overheard him thanking you."

Maaike nodded. "Yes.. I couldn't leave him there. I just... was being a softie." Yet again, she sighed. "All I wanted was to leave it all behind me... I hope you don't feel like I have deceived you or anything.."

Sapphire snorted. "Do not be ridiculous."

"No really, I'm worried. I do not want to hide anything but this is something I feel would compromise everything and-"

"Stop right there." Sapphire said sharply. So she did. "Let me tell you something. You have nothing,  _nothing_ , to worry about. You hear me? Nothing! We all have pasts. Some tell, some don't. Sure, your is much more unique than some other professions but you have chosen another path, and that's with us. Period." Her voice was strong, uncompromising and genuine. More importantly, comforting.

Now was Maaike's turn to be astonished. 

"Look, Maaike. I got the load of shit in my past too. You know that. But there is more. I was broken and bitter. And then I was approached by a member of the dark brotherhood: They gave me an opportunity.. or well... an offer. And I took it."

"You... Were an assassin."  _That would explain the grace in her fighting skills._

She nodded. "Later on, I chose to become a thief instead. Just for the money. And it was the best thing. In this business, we do not kill, unless it is completely necessary. Yet my past was my own. I chose to follow the new pattern. The same... goes for you."

_That... is true._

Maaike looked, in her mind, to her past. For the first time, she was able to accept it and not just ignore it or dwell upon it: It was there and it would never go away. But she herself, was here. 

There was no reason to escape anything. The safe zone was with her already.

"What in the world did I deserve to gain such a friend as you, Sapphire?"

She gave a wicked grin. "Oh, I don't  know... Saving the world might be considered as a good thing, don't you think?"

They chuckled.

"Indeed my friend. Indeed."

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

Brynjolf walked out of the secret entrance. Maaike had send him a message, to come to her home. Strangely enough, he hadn't had the chance visit it, even though it was close. 

_Damn all this work. Mercer is killing me on purpose, I swear._

He shook the thoughts away. He kind of missed the icy beauty. The thought of seeing her again, made him grin. Lass kept him on his toes: Woman was more unpredictable than the sea. But it was worth it.

Brynjolf considered lockpicking his way into the house, as a surprise, but he chose to protect his groin from sudden stabbing with daggers.

He knocked to the front door. 

 _"Shit!"_  Came the voice from inside. She must have dropped something.

Brynjolf chuckled with his usual low tone. Lass certainly didn't hesitate to say what was in her mind. For whatever reason, she didn't open the door. He quipped his eyebrow. 

_Playing hard to get eh? If she is not going to open soon, I'll rethink that lockpicking idea..._

He was about to knock again, but then the door opened. He couldn't believe his eyes.

She had brushed her ebon' hair, and it was open on her shoulders.  _Damn, it has grown so long._ The cream-white tunic on her showed top of her breasts as well as her shoulders. The lavender-colored corset had tiny little pictures of butterflies worked into it. She had tight-dark-brown leather trousers on her, and a copper belt. She had boots that went to her knees: The boots had coppers tone to it, but bit darker. 

On her neck, she had a silver locket, with one sapphire and two amethysts in it. 

"Damn lass... You look..."

"Stupid? I knew these boots were too much! Friggen' Sapphire! This is the last time I-"

Brynjolf gave his, very own, mischievous grin. The look in his green-blue eyed, was... husky and... captivating.

"Maaike. You look gorgeous." He said lowly and stepped forward, putting his hands on her hips, pulling her to a long and deep kiss.

She blushed, but forgot herself in the kiss. They melted, and the warmth between them grew. She moaned his name. He growled in response. She walked backwards, pulling him with him, never leaving the kiss: He closed the door behind him. Bit harshly but there it was.

"Brynjolf.... I-"

"Yes lass?" He mumbled, sucking softly her lower lip, hands massaging her back...up and down.

"I..." She pulled away from the kiss, to look him in the eyes.

"Maaike..." His eyes well filled with something... Something she wanted...

With a low and husky voice she finally whispered:

"I want you."

Brynjolf didn't make any element of surprise, not eagerness. It was impossible to read this man. But then he leaned forward, pressing his lips against her ear, stubble scratching her yet again. His words were filled with... more power than any thu'um.

"I want you too."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :3 Hopefully you liked it.
> 
> I must admit, I hope some of you leaves comments. Sure, I won't force anyone 'cause that's just dicky (that's not even a word ZaZa). 
> 
> Anyways, comments show me who you are. More personal touch you know? When I hear someone say, they liked what they read it will give me motivation to continue and improve. If someone says 'there is room for improvement', it is also encouraging. I wish, that perhaps someday, I would write books or something like that. I'm not much, just a story writer like so many other in this website. You readers can open so many possibilities as well as give us fuel. 
> 
> I write, because I love stories. But the fuel you readers provide, is part of the fire that helps us writers to find new stories... So in a way you readers also create these stories. You help us improve, you give us encouragement and most of all: You inspire. 
> 
> What I mean to say is... Thank you. Because of you supporters/readers/people who have commented, I have found a new realm of life.
> 
> The Realm of stories. 
> 
> Merry Christmas!


	17. For a Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they receive each others' embrace.
> 
> Smut. I regret nothing!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmm. I do not find this to be the best writing ever. There certainly are better sex scene writers, and let me just say, I personally find LONG foreplay kind of boring to read and to write, so I wrote only what I deemed necessary and what I felt would happen between my Maaike and Brynjolf.  
> Basically, the "story creates itself" crap. Hopefully it doesn't disappoint.
> 
> But bottom line. Strongest words, don't require lots of letters.  
> They require meaning.
> 
> That's why I made this chapter short. It felt.... good and right like this.  
> Complete.
> 
> Anyway, I know I have wished you all merry Christmas but now it is literally Christmas in my country (even if it is 1:01 A.M), So I thought I would make this a present for y'all!  
> (ZaZaCobra, don't be silly! They want real presents. Do not be so arrogant, that you'd call your writings a GIFT. That's, yet again, dicky.)
> 
> You get the gesture.
> 
> Have Peaceful Christmas and Fucking Mad New Years. <3

Maaike threw her arms around Brynjolfs' neck, pressing her body tightly against him. His lips left her ear, searching and finding her mouth yet again. Stubble scratching, he claimed her mouth. She felt his tongue against her own. His hands were at the small of her back, putting pressure there: Not so much it would hurt, but enough to know he was physically... stronger... than her.

Slight domination made her quiver.

Sturdy and strong, and the warmth between them, the way their bodies sensed each others touch... Tension and lust started to break the walls of their inner core. Kisses turned to become harsh and fast, but never forgetting to taste: Maaike let her other hand grab his hair, adjusting his head correctly (if bit forceful as her nature tended to be) and suckled his lower lip, biting it a little.

"Eager? Tsk tsk." Brynjolf loosely gave out his wicked grin, then lifted her up, hands around her thighs. 

Maaike gave out a laugh, filled with amusement. "I am not the only one, it seems."

He chuckled, then kissed her neck, intentionally letting his stubble tickle and scratch her. Brynjolf walked to the side of the bed and put her there in a sitting position. He was standing between her legs, looking down at her, eyes darkening. Slowly he knelt in front of her. 

His hands traveled from her thighs, lower, barely touching her. It made her shiver. 

"Trying to play it slow, are we?" Said Maaike, when he started to remove her boots.

He looked up to her now, eyes shadowed with some... song to them. It called her. "Believe me lass, when I say, I want to just rip off your clothes and take you." He wasn't lying. There indeed was passion upon his face, which made him breath out loud. Brynjolf barely kept it in check. 

And all that, turned her own even more.

"Then do it." She had to have him. Maaike was about to grab his collar, but he stopped her by taking her chin into his palm and making their eye-contact more precise.

"You won't get out of this easy. Stay still." 

He gave out a half-smile.

_The bastard is teasing me!_

 

 

He removed her boots, his fingers shaking from tension. Good feeling. Yet tough.

When they were off, her belt was next. It wasn't difficult, he was a thief, in the end: They had nimble finger by nature. When Brynjolf pulled the belt away, his self-control bit broke.. The way he threw it away... Patience was ending. But he struggled to keep it down.

Then came the corset. "Shame to take this one off... It suits you."

"Oh? I'll keep that in mind. For the next time." 

"I love it when you talk in such manner." Sharply he opened the corset and let it fall to the floor.

 _That's it. That was the last bit!_ "Well. We shall see if you love anything else I do to you." Grabbing the front of his guild armor, she pulled him up from the floor, then guided him right next to the beside.

"Lay down."

This time, he didn't argue. He leaned on his elbows. Maaike got to the floor, and now was her turn to undress him. Brynjolf didn't take his eyes off her, and she gave a wicked grin of her own in return. Brynjolf could feel... tightness in his lower stomach. Restraining ones' lust does that.

 

She was like a cat: Coming forward smoothly, as if something was in her mind. Planning, scheming, eyes hovering over him. With her finger, she started to unbutton his guild jacket. Not long and it was off. He had undershirt, white one. He looked so muscular and strong. 

Maaike couldn't handle herself: her hands wandered under his shirt, feeling the tight muscles there. Their breaths could be heard. Brynjolf helped her to remove this shirt and then she was able to watch in awe the chest of a nord man, with large shoulders and little bit chest hair (the same color as his hair). 

His belt was next and to tease him, she came very close to the top of his pants, breathing there. When the belt was unbuckled and pulled off, Maaike finally stood up on her feet and looked at her handwork. Only now, did she drop the belt onto the floor.

"Now now, you are not done already, are you Lass?"

"Shush you. Enjoy the show." 

He obliged and without words, watched her with interest.

Maaike lifted her shirt up, taking it off and throwing it away. She didn't have any underwear. Brynjolfs' breath wavered, his sea-blue-green eyes locked at her. Maaikes' breast were perfectly firm and round. Maaike continued undressing, until she was completely naked, and when the last piece of clothing fell to the floor, there was not only lust and awe in the air...

There was  _need._

 

Brynjolf sat up on the bed, the look in his eyes shattering. Maaike swallowed, leaving everything else behind and with small, slow steps closed the distance between them, until she was between his legs.

For the first time, she broke the eye-contact, bit.... unsure.

But Brynjolf put her face between his hands and made her look at him, again.

"You must be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, Maaike."

She must have blushed, otherwise Brynjolf wouldn't have smirked.

"And you must be the cockiest thief I have ever met." 

He chuckled. Maaike tried to look away again, but he didn't let her.

"Do not look away from me. I will never let anyone steal you away." Never had he been more earnest. Maaikes' heart shuddered and her body shivered. She had no choice but to kiss him again.

Next thing she knew, she was laying on the bed, pillows under her head and Brynjolf over her. 

He didn't hesitate, his lips kissing and sucking her neck, one hand softly reaching the top of her breast. His other hands' fingers touched her stomach, sending shock waves of pleasure inside her. He moved his fingers lower and lower while his other hand started massaging her breast. 

Maaike left out a soft moan, breathing becoming more loud, when his fingers reached her clitoris. His own manhood twitched at the sweet sound of her pleasure. Yet again, he had restrain himself. He started to circle around the source of her pleasure.

The pleasure was like burning fire at her lower stomach! Wetness increased between her legs . And especially when his other hand rubbed her nipple, she could feel the need for strong and rough release. Then she could feel two of his fingers slip inside of her tight core, starting the slow yet sharp movement.

Her breath hissed, not of pain but from... some sort of relief of getting what she needed. Her mouth found his lips once more, and their tongues rejoined each other.

"Talk to me, love. Talk to me." He added one more finger, not too roughly, but adding bit pain and pleasure. And she loved it. Her body loved it. It demanded it.

"Bryn... I..." her voice was interrupted by the sudden moan, when he pinched her nipple, "...want it!"

Brynjolf grinned, stopping the movement of his fingers but leaving them deep inside her, still letting his thumb circle her clitoris. "How much?"

Maaike hissed. "I want it  _bad._ "

"You need it?"

"Yes!"

"And you love it?" He whispered teasingly.

"Damn it, Brynjolf! Fucking  _yes_!!" She couldn't hold it out any more. She needed it, she had to have it. Besides... Foreplay was never her thing.

"I'd hate to disappoint."

 

Brynjolf removed his trousers, and Maaike helped to fasten the process. Then came his underpants.

And finally they were both completely naked, all clothes on the floor. His cock was hard and huge; Even for a nord. Maaike exhaled and took a good look at him.

He was everything she wanted. And she was ready. More than ready.

_Fucking eager._

With that smirk of his, Brynjolf adjusted himself between her legs, never letting his eyes leave hers. He took his cock in his hand, adjusted it at her entrance and rubbing it there: Brynjolf could feel the hot wetness coming out of her. It was intoxicating.

Maaike relaxed, putting her palms on his shoulders. After all this time... Finally... She knew she could move on.

With one more breath, he entered her tight cunt.

 

He was  _huge_. She could feel him stretching her walls and filling her, within every inch when he went deeper. To her, it was as if she was finally united with the strongest and greatest force that she had waited for.

Brynjolf growled. She was tight, hot.... And even his heart felt this new feeling: A feeling that created adrenaline within him, burning every fence away. It was ultimate feeling of safety. 

Not to mention pleasurable.

"Ah..! Fuck! Yes...." She hissed.

When she had completely adjusted, he started moving out, then back in, deeper and deeper each time he pushed forward. And with every thrust, Maaike moaned.

"Had I... fucking known your intentions... I would have... Come to see you.... much... sooner!" Brynjolf had pauses between his words, since he wasn't the one to just move softly and too slowly.

He bit her neck, sucking and licking it. To gain better access, he helped her place one of her legs around his waist, never forgetting to fasten his movement. His other hand became gave him support. He watched her, and saw how her face reacted, how her ice-blue eyes begged for more and how her breasts bounced with every and each thrust of pleasure.

It took control.

The movement increased, the wet voices of their sex and moans... The way her hips reacted to him, the way his cock hit just the right depth with just the right increasing movement and the unimaginable heat around them which made them sweat... 

It was connection. Not just some random union of two people. And they both felt it.

 

Thrusts became more rapid and rough. The dark and husky pain was mixed with sweet pleasure. Maaikes' hands were on his hair, pulling him to kiss her lips once more. She could feel tension down on her core increasing, becoming unbearable, soon it would overcome.

"Bryn...! I'm coming.."

"Wait for it... Come with me..."  He put Maaikes' other leg around him as well, grabbing her hips and giving strong, incredibly fast and deep thrusts and at the same time pulling her to him. He growled with pleasure and need, getting nearer to his peak.

He felt how she tightened around his manhood, her voices becoming more and more loud.

"Yes...! Please...!!" She pleaded.

And it was enough. Brynjolf gave his last powerful thrusts with growling yells, Maaikes' hands tightening around his hair and they both came.

Maaike was first. She yelled and felt her tightening walls brake down and release the bottled-up wave of pleasures, tightening even more, making it impossible for Bryn to hold out any longer. With his last thrust, he came deep inside of her, spilling his seed and filling her. 

 

They were out of breath, but in each others arms. 

 

Finally Brynjolf pulled away, and rolled next to her. She couldn't take her eyes off him. Breathing loudly , turning to her side, she smiled at him.

He turned so he could answer her gaze with a smile of his own.

"By the way..." he said, still out of breath, "I liked the boots. Sapphires' advice wasn't bad."

"Is that so? If you truly like them, feel free to take them."

"Let's make a deal, eh lass? I'll take them, if you come with them." He teased her, in his own charming way.

"Interesting choice of words. Very well! I shall take my boots and corset to our next session."

Brynjolf chuckled. "Ooh, planning ahead then? Good to know you are not throwing me out now." 

"Not yet. You still have uses." Then Maaike leaned forward, pressing her breast against him and whispered: "You didn't think we are done yet, did you?"

"Only in my nightmares. Come, let's make this night one to dream about."

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

She was in his arms. Head resting on his chest. Brynjolf had fallen asleep after the long hours they spent together.

In all honesty, Maaike was a little bit puzzled by it all. There was a man in her bed (and she really had a bed) and they just spent the night together, and now she was playing with his hair while he slept. 

It was.. all kind of bizarre.

But it felt good. Most importantly, it felt right. She didn't know where this was going to go. Maaike was uncertain of the whole situation. Were they lovers? Where they in a relationship? Were they just going to give it a try? She truly didn't know. But she certainly was going to find out the nature of this situation, because no matter what anyone says, there was _something_ here. And it didn't frighten her.

She could in all honesty say this was the best thing that had ever happened to her. 

For a moment, in her life, she had a home, she had a dream job (....in some sense), good friends including a new sister...

And...

A lover.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I shall write as soon as possible. For now, I have important things to attend to :)
> 
> (ZaZa, Watching the new star wars movie is not-)
> 
> *kills logic*
> 
> (?)
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you all, for this amazing year :)


	18. Breakfast at home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike and Brynjolf spend precious alone time together, enjoying it all.
> 
> Maaike is finally able to talk about her uncertainty. Her bravery bears fruit, and with the help of Brynjolf, she feels strength pouring into her.
> 
> Strength to move forward. Strength to memorize. Strength to accept joy in the present.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! I've gained so much support and heart-warming comments. I mean.. Sometimes I get this need to write, even if only for a couple of minutes, everyday! And not only that, I re-wrote one part of this chapter at least.. ugh... Four times and it took many hours! 
> 
> I am so happy, Thanks to you guys :)
> 
> This chapter contains a lot of 'resolving' relationship, as well as fluff (and memories). I first planned on making 'difficult explanations' of certain feelings but then I thought "Hey, don't overthink it. Sometimes the simple way, has more depth to it than some fancy impossible-to-read sentences.
> 
> I am most proud of the ending.
> 
> Enjoy my friends :3

"Oh you son of  _bitch!_ ", Maaike hissed a whisper: She didn't want to wake up Brynjolf.

There was many things Maaike could do. Killing dragons, hunting animals, shooting incredibly long distance with a bow and still hit the target, assassinating someone, pickpocket during daylight, sneaking within the shadows, stare hardened men to submission... All those things she knew how to do. Precisely.

Cooking was not among that list.

Sure, when she had hunted down some animal, just waiting it to 'roast up' on the campfire was one thing. But serious  _cooking_? Using actual ingredients without spoiling it? Never did she learn how to do it.

The horker stew, which she tried to make, looked weird. Recipe stated it would need lavender. So she just followed the instructions and put a real amount of things just... there. 

Reason she had cursed out loud, was because she had tried to brake chickens' egg, but managed to drop the whole egg in there with the eggshells.

 _How this fucker is supposed to be done???_ Too bad these things were something her mother hadn't taught her. 

 _Wait... When was the last time I thought of my mother?_ Maaike was taken aback from the notion. How long it had been since she truly had put her mind into thinking her family? Her former family? Last time she talked about it, was when she told to Sapphire, what happened to them. 

But telling how things are, is different from telling how these things are  _within:_ The feelings, sadness, yearning? Words will always be insignificant.

Funnily enough, the only thing she really remembered from her mother, was her food. She made these honey nut treats, with her own special recipe. Not to mention the roasted venison with these boiled vegetables... 

 _"Food is art, little butterfly. It shows as much of you as does the way you move, walk, talk or fight."_ It was what her mother always kept telling her. To Maaike, these words proved her mothers' Imperial legacy. Nords rarely were ones' for 'courtly' kinds of things. The ones' who were, usually also thought themselves to be superior. 

_Fucking snobs._

But not her mother. She was partially Imperial and Breton, and probably had some Redguard blood too. Sometimes it felt as if there was some Bosmer (wood elf) blood too: The way her mother was able to connect herself with nature and animals. 

 _Her food was always warm. Perhaps I can try to live up to her._ Maaike smiled; Mother was dead, but once more she managed to make her daughter smile.

She opened her food cabin, taking some bread and cheese from there, and placed them upon the dining table.

_If the stew craps out, we'll have a backup plan! Shit. Now I am really starting to sound like ma._

 

 

 

Maaike turned around, when she heard some murmuring from the bedside. Brynjolf was waking up and getting to a sitting position, sheets falling off of him into his lap, showing his magnificent chest.

She hoped he hadn't woken up just because the stew smelled hideous. (Hopefully it didn't smell so bad) 

He rubbed his eyes with one hand, clearing his eyesight. Finally, when his gaze found hers, he grinned at her.

"Did you plan on returning that?" he asked teasingly, pointing out the shirt she currently wore.

Maaike was confused for a second, then looked down and realized: She had picked up  _his_ shirt from the floor, while still being half-asleep.

Looking away (to hide her blushing face), she snorted. "It's not my fault your style is so girlish. Besides, what's the point in being a thief, if you never steal anything?" There was playful coldness in her voice.

He answered with a chuckle, then getting off the bed searching for his trousers, dressing them on. Maaike turned back to her 'cooking'. Stew seemed dusky.  _Is it supposed to look like this?_ She pondered between tasting it or throwing it way.  _Yeah, I just should have gotten something from the meadery._

When Brynjolfs' hands slipped around her stomach from behind, she startled back to reality.

"What's ya cooking?" he whispered, kissing her neck softly.

Maaike hummed contently, closing her eyes. "Poison, of course. What else?"

"Mm, crafty. I like a woman with such unmatched proficiency." 

"You say that, but you clearly underestimate me."

His voice was filled with playful tone. He rested his chin on her shoulder. "Now, what makes you say that?"

"Well," Maaike a ladle and mixed up little bit salt into the stew (a bit), "You are talking to a woman who manages to turn lavender into something poisonous. Be careful what you eat my dear."

Brynjolf gave out a soft laugh, then grabbing a small spoon from the nearby table and took a little spoonful of horker stew, before Maaike could stop him. She bit her lower lip, turning to watch him over her shoulder. 

He shrugged and made this 'not bad' face. "For a poison, it seems quite palatable. Still, you should consider taking it away from the fire. Soon it will have this 'burnt up' aftertaste, which is not the most wanted quality in food."

"Oh crap!" she quickly scrambled off and took the pot away from the fireplace. Luckily this one wasn't so big, so it was easy to lift on the dining table.

Bryn quipped his eyebrow, with this smug grin. 

_Friggen' annoying, that blasted face!_

"You  _really_ made me breakfast." He laughed.  _The bastard laughed!_ "Very cute lass."

" _Cute?!_ You should shut up, if you know what's good for your health." 

"I just ate poison lass."

"Very funny." Maaike couldn't help but to give away half-smile and roll her eyes.

"Be alert on my dear: Otherwise I might steal that shirt back...." With that wicked look, he stepped closer to her (now that she was at the dining table), and gave her a quick, but deep, kiss. "So how 'bout that?"

She swallowed and looked at him with . "Well considering your very persuading tactic, I'd say... Lesson learned! Now eat or I'll kick you out of my house." She gave his cheek a pat, then sat down on a chair. Brynjolf followed suit.

 

 

 

They ate their breakfast, chatting this and that. Occasionally they would flirt or say few serious words, but that was secondary. Maaike was surprised how hungry she was, and Brynjold did comment on that. She simply told him that night filled with sex tends to make people hungry.

Brynjolf raised a loaf of bread to his lips and took a bite. He had this interrogating expression, and he was  _not_ looking at her breasts.

Maaike turned her head a bit to the side. "You keep looking at me like that. What is it? You should answer quickly, because this is just getting rather creepy."

He jumped away from his thoughts, meeting her curious look. He shook his head. "It's nothing, though considering the way you are now frowning at me, you don't believe me, eh?"

"Your skill of observation never fails to impress me."

Brynjolf chuckled at that. "That's a relief."

"Well, I am getting quite impatient so would you mind talking to me?" Her words were playfully high pinched. 

 "You see," his elbows were on the table and he leaned on them, "things have been improving lately. A lot." He was referring to the new flow in business. "Guess I'm  just pondering, what's our part."

Maaike didn't say anything more.

 

After they had eaten enough, Maaike and Brynjolf started dressing up. It was a new day, and a lot of work needed to be done. She went to her wardrobe to take her guild armor. Brynjolf picked up his guild jacket from the floor, and leaned his back against the wall opposite to the bed, so he could admire the sight of her dressing up.

Even after last night this made her blush a bit, but she decided to remain silent, and removed Brynjolfs' tunic throwing it onto her bed, immediately changing into basic underclothes and the armor. But not before Bryn got a glimpse of her naked body.

When it was all done, she turned around, finding him still leaning against her wall. 

"I take it you want your tunic back? Well feel free to take it." She motioned him to take his tunic, which was still on her bed.

He shook his head with the usual grin of his. "No, I think I'll just leave it here. You seemed too attached! It would be cruel to just break up you two."

"Ha-ha Brynjolf, you are a genius with a kind heart."

"Do not forget: I am also extremely handsome and quick witted scoundrel." 

"Yeah yeah- Don't push it."

Playfully he raised his hands, as if he'd surrendered (but it didn't stop him from chuckling). "I'll shut up."

"By the Divines, a miracle has happened!"

Grinning, he rolled his eyes at that. Regardless of his cocky attitude, Maaike walked to him with few sharp steps, kissing him on the cheek. "Thanks for the shirt. Or, well, thanks for giving me something that wasn't stolen for a change."

"Now, what makes you think it isn't stolen?"

Maaike shrugged. "Gut feeling honey."

"Yeah, well, if you keep calling me with these 'honeyed words' I might as well put some terms to my shirts ownership, starting with 'no name calling in public'."

"Well I don't want you to call me sugar-tits either, so I think we can have a deal. But the shirt is mine now, don't think otherwise." There was odd purr to her voice. Brynjolf didn't seem to mind.

"I can work with that." He grinned mischievously, putting his one hand on her jaw and the other to the small of her back, pulling her closer, and kissing her once more.

 

 

With that, he went to get his guild armor on. Now was Maaikes' turn to watch, and she started to wonder.

 _What are we doing?_    _Where things are?_

They admitted mutual interest in one another but it was clear it had grown into something else. It wasn't sex that made her think about it, Maaike had actually felt this way for a while now, but now she simply allowed herself to think on these things, because she was able to move forward in her life, leaving past behind. Which of course opened so many new windows, including all the joys and problems that comes when you open your eyes for the first time in a new environment.

And Maaike didn't know where she was. She had a clue, but it didn't make her any less uncertain of how tings were. She wanted to talk to Brynjolf about it, but was afraid he'd become uncomfortable or just not care... or-

_Wow, that doesn't help. It only proves how much I... care... And now I wanna talk to him even more!_

It was all very ridiculous. But this morning, when Maaike had woken up, laying upon his chest, she had known one thing for a fact: 

She was harboring feelings for Brynjolf.

The realization hit her. It was very straightforward! She had feelings for him! That's why she had been uncertain, making things more complicated than they were (in her mind) and put too much thought into it.

Feelings will make things complicated. They will mess up ones' head, thoughts and simply create more uncertainty, making things more complicated than they really are.

Maaike knew: For the first time, in a long time, she knew.

  _I. won't. Just. Let. It. Be! I need to-_

 

 

 

"You _need_ to say what's on your mind lass, otherwise I am pretty sure you're explode." Brynjolf noted. He was dully dressed now.

Maaike jumped awake from her thoughts. She felt little bit mixed up, but she was able to get herself together. 

"Lass?" He stepped in front of her.

She sighed. "I need to talk with you."

"Alright." He said calmly.

Maaike didn't dare look him in the eyes, it was too embarrassing. 

"Where are we Bryn?"

"...In your house?"

She rolled her eyes. "I mean what's between us? Seriously! Where are we? Last night was amazing and I want to continue but- Ugh! Sorry. I'm trying not to screw things up here, but.." She massaged her forehead, embarrassed, with heat rising upon her face. 

_This sounded much better in my head!_

 Brynjolf was quiet. First he was bit amused by her nervousness, but then in all seriousness he stepped in front of her, taking her face into his palms making her look him in the eyes. They had this dark shade of solemness but at the same time there was this sliver of bright honesty, as well as something reassuring. 

In this embrace, he couldn't help but see the beauty in Maaikes' eyes. Those icy crystals where one of a kind. He could not tear his eyes from her; He could not brake the eye-contact. 

"Look. Maaike," his voice was low and husky, but still genuine, "I don't know where we'll end up. But there is only one thing I do know..."

Maaike held her breath and whispered quietly: "What?"

Bryn grinned. "We'll stick together. Everything else? We will figure it out. What do you say?"

She smiled at him. He hadn't used as many words, as she had said in her mind. But the meaning within those words was stronger than she could ever describe. It was all she needed, or wanted to here. She didn't need to ask any more stupid questions, because her heart felt the greatest kind of relief, when this unnamed stone of worry was lifted far far away from her arms.

"There is nothing I'd want more." Her eyes became little bit teary eyed and her smile shined with happiness.

"Good. Then, we are in this package together." With that, both of them closed their emotion filled eyes, and leaned on to meet each others' lips. 

 

Maaike gave out a half-smile. "We don't need to leave right away, do we..?"

Her purring words peaked Brynjolfs' interest and he quipped his eyebrow. He showed a grin of his own. "You read my mind."

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

"I think we have stalled enough for one day, don't you think?" Maaike straightened her Guild jacket, and put belt correctly on.

Brynjolf finished putting his boots on. "Sadly, I agree. Others might start to wander where we are."

Maaike looked at him and smiled. Last hours had been wonderful. She even felt weak in the knees. Literally. _Perhaps Tonilia has some potions for... aching._

They walked to door and a wave of anxiety washed over her, which kind of pissed her off. In the end, they had established (in a way) what their relationship was. Why strain the issue further? 

_Oh for... Why in the fucks' name am I stressing again?! If I worry any more, he'll get enough and run off!_

But she remembered what Mercer had done to her: she  _remembered_ his threat. There was lot of things to consider, when in an affair like this. More than she recalled anyway.... 

_But that's just part of the package? And we are in this together, like he said..._

For a moment, she debated whether or not would she tell Brynjolf about the morning at the lake, when Mercer assaulted her. In their shoes, it would be highly risky to talk behind their Guildmasters' back.

On the other hand... He had the right to know.

Brynjolf was set on opening the front door, but before he was able to, Maaike walked beside him and grabbed his hand. Bryn swiftly turned his gaze on her, inquiring look on his face.

"Before we get back.. Do we keep this a secret or..?"

Brynjolf taken aback, but not shocked. Just surprised. "Uh, this is not against any rules. Our private life is for our own, but if you feel compelled-"

"Oh no-no-no-no!" Her response was instant and her voice even quicker, as well as higher. "It's not that! I am not ashamed of anything, I feel this is just the right thing, I just think we should not take too high profile with this... In public or well... uhh... I mean sure, others must have their... 'suspicions' but.." Maaike didn't know what to say. She was afraid how'd they react? That wasn't a solid argument.

Before Maaike could continue on, Brynjolf shook his head, trying to finish her line for her: "...But you wish to keep business just business, work just work and be professional, and all that? Keeping too high profile during work, might compromise our working environment?"

"Yes! Exactly!"  _Whew! Fingers crossed!_

Brynjolf grinned. "No worries. I agree. Didn't like pet names on public anyway. Regardless, I would've suggested something similar from my behalf soon enough. Gotta keep it professional. But just in public."

"Then.. I really am worrying too much, aren't I?"

"Sure, but it's adorable. Never loose any advantage, lass."

"Ha-ha. Move your ass out of my doorway and get moving!"

Playfully he made this uptight bow, like some court-servant...whatever: "Yes m'am!"

 

Then he finally opened the door, and they got going.

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

Mercer smashed a bottle of black-briar reserve against the walls, inside his manor. He growled with deep anger, climbing away from his throat. 

He was enraged, and his his wrath, he stomped to his desk sweeping everything on it, to his floor. Inkwell fell, broke and its' ink flowed all over. It spoiled the honey nut treats (meant as breakfast) that also been wiped onto the floor. 

He picked up a chair. 

_Everything had gone as planned!_

Mercer smashed the chair against his desk, both of them cracking but not braking.

_Every preparations!!!_

Another smash.

_Keeping them away!_

Third smash broke both desk, and the chair.

**"AND STILL _MY_ PROPERTY IS DEPRIVED FROM ME!"**

His roar gurgled from the top of his lungs, when he smashed his fist against his bookshelf, making it crack and his knuckles bleed. He looked down at the floor.

He breathed. The man who had delivered the message, the venomous report of his _subjects_ activities, laid on the floor with his head dispatched. Not before his eyes had been ripped off, of course.

_They will regret their own existence in the shadow of my displeasure. They will regret the day, they came to my disfavor._

Raising his face from the floor, he looked up eyes empty and dark. But showing even more:

He had nothing, but he'd have it all.

Mercer Frey snarled, both hands turning into fists, his thoughts finding a new horizon and plan.

 

 

 

"They will suffer."

  

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel I discolor the meaning of 'thank you' if I use it too much, but really.
> 
> Thank you all for reading, kudos, comments and well.. support.
> 
> I mean it. :3
> 
> Happy New years!
> 
> Plus. The new Star Wars movie? Fucking awesome.


	19. Mercers' Desk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike is in many peoples' thoughts.
> 
> But in good, or bad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usually I'd apologize for the wait. This time? I have reasons of my own. I also played Skyrim for some time, to delve into surrounding, ponder the plot and watch characters as well as define their personalities. This all for Maaikes' story.
> 
> So... Good news and bad news. I'll start with the bad one.
> 
> Well, it's actually just bad for me. I have a sickness (I am not going into detail, let's just say its bad) which forces me to take a leave from school. Hopefully I'll be able to return.
> 
> Good news: I have, at least, half a year for myself (and for my treatment). I cannot promise fast updates, but I must have something to do. Might as well be this, right?
> 
> Regardless, I hope you will enjoy this chapter!

 

 

 

"You didn't mention you took down Summerset Island." Brynjolf noted. 

Maaike took her gaze away from one of the training rooms' chests, to look at him. He was standing steadily at the entrance, frowning. It wasn't accusing look, not really, just thoughtful. She turned her eyes back to the chest and her lockpicking. 

"Are you disappointed I didn't ask you to accompany me?" Her voice was calm and eyes focused.  _This damn lock... How difficult must it be?_

He changed his pose, shifting weight of his body more onto his left leg. "No, I'm simply surprised. Astonished, to be frank."

Maaike simply quipped her eyebrow. "Oh? Wanna tell me why?"  _Just little bit alternation.... Unlock, unlock..._

"....I'm surprised 'is all. How relaxed you are. I thought you'd celebrate the whole thing more visibly." 

"Maybe I am just still weak on the knees." She said wryly, trying to hide her smile.

Brynjolf chuckled, unnecessary tension draining away, with his frown clearing from that rough face. "Aye, there is that. But still, you've always been one tense and fierce dragon yourself. Not last night though, and even less now."

That caused Maaike to brake the lockpick she currently was using.  _Shit._ Despite the little annoyance, she remained calm and started from the beginning. _I had chosen to stay quiet about Dragons, and I intend to keep it that way._

"The whole crap with them... attack with the guards months back... It was just another matter put to rest, and it was oddly satisfying to take 'em down." Her voice didn't shake. Truth was easy to describe.  _Few twists..._

"Understandable."

"Yeah. But I guess it's done and buried now, like any personal business should be. No reason to dwell upon it, when the weight is no longer there. So yeah, I'm damn pleased I succeeded, but for once, I'll just let it be."

Click.

_Oh yes!  It finally opened._

Brynjolf grinned at her eager expression. "You worked long on that lock, didn't you?"

"Long enough! Now, we shall see if this baby is just for practice, or if here's actually some prize!" Slowly but surely, opening the chest and- ".....it's empty. The fucker's empty." 

"...And there comes the temper we all know!" 

Angrily, she got on her feet and saw Brynjolfs' knowing smirk. "Oh no you don't! You'd better wipe that grin of yours away, if you know what's good for you."

"You sure were not so demanding in our previous activity." He took few steps closer.

Maaike had to pretend to be upset, with hands on her hips, she took playful look of dissatisfaction on her face, looking away from him. "Well, we might not repeat it then."

"Turning away at the last line, are we now? Not very subtle." He was close now.

Her wicked eyes looked into his own, mischievously. "I am not a subtle woman."  _Such flirtation!_

"Never claimed you were." 

"Mm-m." Maaike gave him a quick peck on his lower lip, then walking pass him like nothing. "I've got a job to do. See you later."

Brynjolf scratched his stubble, looking after her. "Pleasure." He didn't see, but Maaike had a very wide smile.

In her weird existence, she was content. As a thief.

And that made her happy.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Maaike cursed silently. She loved fishing jobs, just quickly pickpocket a certain item off of a mark then report back to Delvin, but she hated the fact that it was all so uncertain. Depending on luck might raise adrenaline but it was always shaky. Untrustworthy. 

This time, it was close.   _Too close._ Aerin, Mjolls' own personal pet who followed her like a lost pup, was the target. Boy was daft but Mjolls' presence made him more aware every day. One might be envious of those two: So certain of righteousness, yelling things they do not view as idealistic things, but as hard facts. 

Beyond their weak and simply mind, their hearts might be true to themselves. Who knows? Posturing as a hero however, was pathetic.

 _Thieves, the evil lawbreakers... pfft. Life is as good as you make it to yourself._ And Maaike loved this. To her, it wasn't a last resort of a broken person, not anymore. Not a evil choice of incompetent fools or selfish thugs: It was an enjoyable existence with benefits. 

It wasn't fair to all, but at least it was true and honest to itself. People like Black-Briars wore pretty masks and used manipulation to master their influence. Loved in "the civil, proper" and most importantly, on the "legal" systems' front. In reality, treachery and deception was the truth. And this was the "proper" side of people. People like Mjoll would argue that this is just another part of the corruption, and that it should not be like this.

Perhaps. But it has always been like this and always will be. Part of nature. The greatest criminals are the ones we have always allowed to be. Laws, masks etc. All the same.

Thieves Guild was true and straightforward. And Maaike _fucking_ loved it. In a way, she had been very lucky.

  _Lucky. Such irony._

 

She walked through the market, towards Temple of Mara. Sapphire said she'd meet her at the guild entrance, after her own heist was done. Maaike looked around, but there was no one at the cemetery. Not yet. 

Bit frustrated from the decreasing adrenaline, she leaned her back against the stone wall behind her. Night was arriving with cold breeze. Her breath could be seen in the air. And then, beautiful tiny snowflakes started flowing from the sky. 

She had seen snow. A lot of snow. Mountains were not kind to travelers. There, it was a curse from heavens. But down here it was soft and tender. Maaike extended her hand, palm up so she might catch one for her own. Soon enough she was able to see snowflakes melting on her palm. 

_Tiny things. Always so detailed.... and special._

_Still cold._

"Did you lose your mind over the last job, or just so bad you'd take anything not to be empty-handed?"

Quickly dropping her hand to her side, Maaike got properly on her feet. "Good to see you too Sapphire." She said just as mockingly. "How did your arresting-cycle go?" Half-smile on her face, she turned her head to look at the young woman who just snickered at her.

"Why, it was most pleasant. I got some really nice emeralds too. Bonus never hurts."

"I bet." Maaike waved her hand towards the secret entrance. "Move your ass. I want to get my cut."

"Change of subject...." There was mischief in Sapphires' too sweet voice. Maaike knew that tone.

"I swear, if this is about the boots again, I already told you-"

"-that you won't comment, 'cause you don't want this to spread too much. Fine fine! But I can only assume Brynjolf liked them, considering your glowing this morning." 

 _Aaand there it is._ Maaike rolled her eyes, as she climbed down the ladder. "I didn't glow, so might as well drop it."

"Oh very well. Just know that...." Sapphire silenced herself for a moment, climbing down the ladder herself. Once down, Sapphire looked upon her face. When she didn't continue her sentence, Maaike gave her a frown. Sighing, she continued: "Fine. I'm glad it's working. Happy?"

"You don't have to hold back on me. I won't think any differently of you." Giving Sapphire an earnest smile, Maaike took her hand on her own.

Sapphire gave a half-smile. "Sure sure. Good for me.. Thanks."

Maaike gave two pats on the hand of the other woman, before letting go. "Now let's get going, you good old softie!" 

"You have to do that?"

"Yep. Teasing people is one of my finer qualities."

Sapphire rolled her eyes. "Great. SO when are you leaving this hole again?"

"Nope! Sorry. You guys are stuck with me now."

"Lucky us."

 

 

 They grinned at each other, holding back laughter and moved on to the Flagon. Basic group was there: Delvin, Vekel, Dirge, Tonilia... Only Vex was on a job which pissed off Sapphire; She'd have to wait for her pay.

"I'll see what Tonilia can give me for this junk." Sapphire murmured.

Maaike took seat at a table, picking up the trinket, one she had snatched from that Aerin boy, from her pocket and throwing it to Delvin. Old man caught it in his big palm.

"There you go Delv, have fun with it."

Delvin checked out the trinket, turning it over and over. Finally satisfied with it, he pocketed it. "Oh I will hon'. Here's your well-deserved payment. Don't spend it all in one place." 

Maaike took the money and half-smiled. "Why thank you. I might not spend it all now, but to hell with it! Vekel, pass me some ale would you?"

"Right at you, just wait a moment, I gotta but the stew bubbling."

"Take your time, I have the coin here." 

While Vekel the crap he called job, Delvin leaned forward on his elbows to talk to the pale, dark-haired woman before him. 

"Gotta say girl, you do some fine work. If you don't watch it, I might actually come to respect ya." His usual hoarse voice had a jesting upper tone to it. 

Maaike grinned at that. "Aww. Are you going soft on me or are you just trying to find substitute for our currently absent Vex?"

"Nah." He simply growled giving a wave with his hand, as if dismissing the thought. "Never been one for all the soft an' tender kisses."

 Maaike narrowed her eyes, then shaped her mouth into an "o". "So that's why you go after Vex! You know, that explains a lot... Rough."

"Hey! I didn't mean it like that, or anythin'! Besides, I'd prefer keep my ass safe from Brynjolf. Unless you'd like to give a spin..." 

"Dream on old man." At this pause, Vekel served her her drink. Taking a sip of that cool, clean liquid, Maaike watched as Sapphire took a seat next to her. "So Vekel, what's the word around here?"

"Let me think." The brown haired bartender carried some old bottles away, cleaning the tables. He thought for a moment before speaking. "Well, just after you finished the latest huge jobs for her, Maven had visited this place, all smiles. Even Maul had hinted something of a sort! Whatever you did back at Honningbrew, made her happy. And when she's happy, Mercer's happy. Keep this up, and you'll go places."

 Maaike frowned. "I wouldn't go  _that_ far."

 "Come now girly. You've been makin' waves around this old wagon: Mercer might not admit it, but I swear even he has taken a notice. Don't disappoint us now by quittin' while the money's good."

Delvin might have meant it as a compliment, but Maaike took it as a warning. She remembered his threat well and clear. Though unlike before, uneasy feeling didn't consume her. 

Instead, her stubborn and cheeky side snickered at that mans' gall. He'd see how profitable she was. He couldn't afford making empty promises. Not to her. Not ever again.

_I will not be bound down, not discouraged, nor played with. Dibellas' tits, I'm gonna enjoy the future._

Maaike gave out a half-smile. "I won't Delv."

"Now that's what I'd like to hear! We'll might even get this barrel rollin' again. It'll just need a little push as well as teamwork."

Sapphire shook her head. "Honestly Delvin, I'm unsure if the word "teamwork", is the one you're looking for." Maaike shot questioning look at her.

"Oh come now, we are bonding over here! Don't tell my I'm imaginin' it!" 

Maaike snorted at that. "Old man, me and Sapphire are, at the very least, connected in the thought that neither of us wants to know what kind of sick images goes through that big head of yours."

"On that I agree." Sapphire finished.

 

 

They continued similar kind of banter for awhile. Delvin would give them some pointers, then make some inappropriate comments, earning of threats of violence from Maaike, Sapphire, Tonilia and even Vekel.

Only Dirge was left outside. He was too grumpy.

Maaike was about to ask for a new assignment, when they heard someone coming out of the Cistern: A door was slammed close. Loudly. All became silent, expect for the footsteps.

_Someone is either angry, or in a hurry._

 

 To all of their surprise, it was Brynjolf. He halted his movement at the door that led to the Ratway Vaults. His entire face was silenced by the frown upon his brow and forehead. It was quite worrisome, especially when his stance seemed to imply something what Maaike had hard time figuring out: As if he was preparing for an attack.

She shot a questioning look at him, and he waved her over. Without a word she obliged and walked over to him.

_What the hell is going on? Just a few hours ago, he seemed fine._

"What's with the grim look Bryn? Are you alright?" Maaike tried to hide it, but there was clear worry inside her heart. Brynjolf seemed to notice this. He shook his head.

"Nothing like that, lass. I just had a little... 'briefing' with Mercer." _That doesn't sound good._ "We've finally had a breakthrough on our mysterious enemy. The one whose tried to destroy us by delving a wedge between Maven and the Guild. Goldenglow... Sabjorn... It comes to this: Mercer thinks he can identify this thorn on our sides."

"...And you are talking to me because...?"  _Shouldn't this be a good thing?_

With barely concealed uneasiness  _(and anger?)_ Brynjolf took a deep breath. "He wants to.... meet with you right away."

 _Crap. Luck is a bitch, eh?_ "Right. I ain't got no choice, do I?"

"If I were you I'd hurry and tread carefully. I've never seen him this angry before."

"That sums up it all... Well let's get this over with. I'm dying to know our nemesis."

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Brynjolf watched after her. He knew there was something she wasn't telling him. Before he had thought it was just another thing from her past. But there was more. Now he knew.

 

_"...Go get our new rising recruit. I want to brief her myself on this one."_

_"Maaike? Are you certain? Perhaps we should take some different route of action, lass is capable but so is our new rival. We could craft a-"_

_"No." Mercer had growled very angrily. It took Brynjolf by surprise, and he was taken aback. The Guildmaster turned his dark, shadowed eyes to his own._

_"Mercer?"_

_"You are fucking her."_

_He couldn't believe his ears. How could one even answer to such a thing? Mercers' 'matter of fact' attitude made him feel wrong in his stomach. It was threatening as well as sickening._

_Brynjolf couldn't answer. His silence spoke louder._

_Mercer turned his angry gaze on his books again, mouth turning into snarl of... disgust?_

_"If you want to get a whore on your free time, that is your business. Do not bring it on my desk. No matter how pretty little cunt there might be."_

_If this had been anyone else, Brynjolf would have choked him to death. Every instinct in his body wanted to rip the mans eyes out. If this man had been someone else, Brynjolf would have cut off his insulting tongue and fed it to dogs. If this man had been someone else..._

_But he wasn't. **It** was Mercer._

_The Guildmaster saw the boiling anger in Brynjolfs' eyes: Greatest storm, which all sailors cursed to be Divines' wrath. He had to give a half-smile; a grin to mock Brynjolfs' self-control and infatuation._

_And he had to press the dagger deeper._

_"Or maybe you'd like to bring her to my desk. If you do, you'd better leave her there. We'll see if precious Maaike is willing to open her legs to anyone close to this desk."_

_Brynjolf smashed his palm onto the desk. " Do **not** speak of her  like that." _

_Contact  of the flesh and wood, made a loud noise. Cold sweat run down Brynjolfs' forehead: It was a battle of self-control._

_And he had lost. To himself._

_Mercer snorted, victorious, and returned to his papers. "Carry off. Get the girl here right away. This matter will be solved, and I will get it done."_

_Brynjolf backed off, everything blurring in his head. Maaike. Maaike._

_She is at the flagon..._

 

 

Now he knew indeed.

There was something Maaike didn't tell about Mercer.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be the 20th! 
> 
> I am going to make it the longest by far! This I swear. I shall not delay too long, and I'll work on it every day!
> 
> Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter! :3 Thank you all for your wonderful support!


	20. Loving Zeal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike is getting closer to discovering their enemy.
> 
> This chapter includes smut so.... Enjoy ^ ^

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The treatment I mentioned? It's awful. Helpful in the long run, but still horrible and tiring. 
> 
> Doing routine things like eating, speaking, walking or just caring are difficult. But those things are something I can handle.
> 
> The worse side effect (in my opinion) is that it sucks out all the inspiration, the motivation! Usually if I am angry, sad, anguished etc, I can turn these emotions into inspiration but this "healing" takes it all until I am an empty shell for days.
> 
> I am sorry I haven't been active. But I am more upset than sorry. I suppose that's a good thing. Being "upset" can be used to create more inspiration. Hell, I got a new hair cut and it's one of the only sources of inspirations I've got.
> 
> I simply want you to know that every sentence I now write, is a GREAT struggle for me. I am not happy with my creations; I cannot be. But I will not write empty words; I refuse. 
> 
> Shit, I sound like a nutjob. Though I suppose we all are. Especially Maaike and me. 
> 
> Anyway, I do treasure the way you guys have supported me, so... thank you. You're awesome :)

 

 

 

He didn't even look at her. Just reading his papers... "Ah, you are finally here." 

 _No shit._ " _Boss_. You called for me."

Mercer nodded and straightened his back. There were some really dark clouds upon his eyes. Shivering. "I have consulted my contacts regarding the informatian you have recovered. They were not able to identify that symbol, but my sources finally came through. We should have a way to identify our nemesis."

Maaike frowned. She almost wanted to say ' _that's it?'_ but she held it in. "They must be very influential, to have avoided being caught by our guild for such a long period of time." It had been a few months since her last gig relating to this matter! The Guild ran all thieving schemes in Skyrim! There was no other way, they could have avoided being caught...

Mercer let out a growl, finally looking at her. "They are well funded, organized. And it seems like our adversary attempted to take us apart indirectly by angering Maven Black-Briar. Very clever."

Maaike shifted on her place, restless. This simply made no sense to her. "Yes, true: They are powerful this way. Though I wonder what could be their motive."

"It makes no difference. Our nemesis is going to pay dearly." Mercers' look was a warning sign. He was getting frustrated. Maaike realized poking was not the best course of action just now. He swiped his chin with his fingertips: all the work made him sweat. Even if the environment was cold.

"I take it you have a directive for me?"

He nodded with slight movement, seemingly uninterested in her presence. "Even after all their posturing and planning, they've made a mistake. That parchment you recovered mentioned 'Gajul-Lei'. According to my sources, that's an old alias used by one of our  _former_ contacts. His real name is Gulum-Ei... _Slimy bastard..._ " He murmured the last bit.

 _I see. That kind of 'former contact' Not gonna be fun._ Maaike could have tried her luck with more questions, but again chose to move the conversation on. Brynjolf could tell her more. 

"Where do I begin?"

"He was our inside man at the East Empire Company in Solitude. I'm betting he acted as go-between for the sale of Goldenglow Estate and that he can point out our buyer."

"Makes sense. I'll go?"

Mercer quipped his eyebrow. "Why do you think I asked you here? To ask your _opinion_?" he asked mockingly "Get out there, shake him down and see what you can come up with. If you have questions, you know the drill." 

_Yeah. Ask anyone else, just not you._

Maaike was about to leave, but then she felt Mercers' hand grabbing her arm with a stern grasp, stopping her. The strong and sudden contact made her gasp. face-to-face, he stared directly into her eyes.

"We are few inches close to unmasking our foe. Do  **not** screw this up... If you know what is good for you."

There was hatred there; in his eyes.

Maaike made a thin line with her lips, swallowing strongest bits of her fury. She blinked her eyes twice. Then allowed the fury to rise to her stare, directly making him aware of it.

"If you don't think I'm up to it,  _don't_ send me. I am no child; I don't need you to hold my hand for this _boss_." She gave out a grin: "Literally."

Mercer narrowed his eyes, but couldn't fool Maaike: He was stunned by her courage. Never had she been so brazen with him.

Shaking his head, he let her go and returned to his letters, dismissing her completely. 

And she walked away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

Maaike didn't like the way Mercer talked. Hell, she hated the way he looked at....  _Everything_. 

Walking towards honeyside, she gathered her thoughts.

This whole mess made her uneasy, even though she had just sworn to stand her ground. Mercer wasn't really talking with Maaike, he was telling her... no, instructing her like one would with a dog: Dog didn't know any better. 

Not that she was shaking in her boots. Staring down a dragon tended to strengthen your backbone. Or brake it completely. Luckily she wasn't the former or she wouldn't be here.

But the 'forceful master' wasn't the side she despised most. No... 

It was the sheer pleasure on his face: He didn't shroud this tiny smile at the corner of his lips whenever there was even a small, almost non-existent, moment when  _he_ was-- 

_...In feel of a monarch: a sovereign. A God._

Ulmer, _the _fucking-Godless-Bastard_ , _had been like that. Alduin as well: So in power they feel as if they were  _Eternity,_ or life itself. Reveling in the motion of moving a pawn. Power should always be respected, treated with caution... unless it's tainted. Then it is just another disgusting way of excusing your slavery.

Beasts like Alduin, Ulmer, Mercer and hell, perhaps Maven, were efficient but cruel; For them it was too easy to corrupt everything around them.

 

_"We are few inches close to unmasking our foe. Do **not** screw this up... If you know what is good for you."_

 

 Maaike shook Mercers' words away with a smile. 

 

  _"I_ _f you don't think I'm up to it, don't send me. I am no child; I don't need you to hold my hand for this boss. Literally."_

 

 His reaction had been totally worth it. Better, she was proud of herself. It felt great to make him feel childish. Sure it was dangerous. But so was she.

 

 

Grinning, Maaike opened the door of her house and slipped in. She'd had to prepare for a journey. If Brynjolf didn't come by later, she'd visit him before leaving. Something about his demeanor had bugged her. When he had told her to go see Mercer... 

_Hm. I might be reading too much into it. Burden of work is something he often wears upon his shoulders._

She threw off her Guild jacket, and started gather things into a pack. Poisons, healing- and magicka potions, etc. Food could be stolen or hunted, mead and bedroll were already packed.

_I suppose that all of it, actually. Do I need anything else? I think not. Now I just-_

Someone knocked twice her door. Maaike frowned. It had to be Brynjolf. As strange as it seemed she recognized when he knocked, because there was always this weird rhythm to it. Usually it was laid-back and teasing.

This time, the sound was tense.

She walked quickly to the door, unlocking it. Funny how normal this had become. Opening the door, she faced a man with frowning eyes. 

 

"Wow, did someone steal your purse?" Maaike tried to joke, but it didn't cut it.

 Brynjolfs' frown didn't go away, but for her relief his body language became more relaxed. "No, I don't think so. Care to enlighten me on few issues, regardless?"

He was almost never completely 'dead-on-serious', but now it was close... Not entirely, but still-- Nevertheless, his mood was disturbing. 

 

Maaike looked away from his green-blue eyes, nodding him to come in. Once he was inside, he took a sat down on a chair, massaging his temples.

When she had closed the door, she leaned her back against it and then looking at the floor. "A long day?"

"Not really, no. Just intriguing." Expression changed: He seemed to look for words, but before he could start he closed his mouth. Finally shaking his head he spoke: "What the hell happened?"

"Specify."

"Really lass, really? Fine. I saw your conversation with Mercer. What the hell provoked him to grab you?"

Maaikes' head rose as quickly as she heard his words, and she couldn't believe her ears. "That's what bothers you? That something _p_ _rovoked_   ** _him_**?He has been a total pain ever since I joined, no matter what I did! And now it suddenly bothers you?"

Brynjolf let out a frustrated breath. "Maaike, we all know how harsh he is. But he is also the thing that has kept the Guild going. We haven't even seen you two  _talk_ , not so much as  _acknowledge_ each other in the Cistern! I _have to_ assume there is something more to this than just randomly getting pissed off."

"Oh yeah? What kind of 'something more' are you looking for? I am not aware of any reason why he is aggressive towards me."

 

"If you don't know more than I, then how in the hell are you so enraged by him? How could _he_ be enraged by you? You've only had  _few_ discussions with him... " His gaze darkened:"...That we  _know of_."

Maaike flinched before she could hold it.  _Shit! True! That encounter at the lake... Only real clue for our hate for each other._ She swallowed and looked at the floor again.

Her silence answered Brynjolf. He stood up slowly walking over to her and with his fingers, he lifted her chin up so she would look into his eyes. 

 

Maaike and Brynjolf, bot of them, had a neutral expression upon them. Looking into each other, searching for answers.... He wanted to know. She didn't want to put him into a difficult position.

"What happened lass?"

She let out a shallow breath, voice bit shaking. "I spoke the truth when I said I do not know why he is hostile towards me; he has no reason... that I know of. Bryn I have been.." Maaike looked away.

He gave her time.

"..I suppose I was fearful."  _Yeah here we go. Shit._

This surprised Brynjolf. "Fearful?"

"Well it is damn difficult to admit, but yeah.. If I know why someone has a bone to pick with me, I know where to stand. But he... cornered me.  _Threatened,_ to be more specific. Shit, this sounds like from some bad novel, doesn't it?"

"Kind of. But I believe you."

Now was her turn to be surprised. Maaike turned her ice-blue eyes to his, to see if he was serious. And he was! But there was.. anger too.

Brynjolf put his hands upon her shoulders, as if to steady her; there was spark of anger. "What did he tell you?"

 

Maaike was about to speak but refused say a word until he was going to press for more: "Bryn-- Like you said: He is our boss, but you are his second! I don't want to put you into a compromising position."

His grip tightened, voice low and angry growling: "By the Eight woman, I will choose where I stand but I want to know my ground! Don't you see I _fucking_  worry for you..?!"  

Bryns' voice spoke out of complete affection. Maaike had never heard this tone before... from anyone...

 

Breath stuck in her throat, she placed her shaking hand to the side of his face, caressing his stubble. "Bryn," she breathed, "I am already yours. Please... Believe-- no--,  _trust_   in me when I tell you there is no foul play here! Things with Mercer are tense but he is our boss: nothing _more_ , nothing less. He is only related to our lives through our work.. So I fear no longer, you shouldn't either..."

Brynjolf was silent not letting go of her. His expression, his eyes, were unsure and worried. It was difficult to let things be.

"Bryn. Please."

 

 

 

And that was all it took: Brynjolf pulled her foward, smashing his lips against her in a rough and scratching kiss. Maaike threw her arms around his neck; His body warmth was still very hot out of the anger and uncertainty. Now it was turning into a real  _heat._ They were longing for each other.

Brynjolf lowered his hands quickly, finding their way under her shirt. He needed to touch her hot and silky skin.

It didn't take long before all their clothes were off on the floor and he practically threw her against the wall. They had no interest going to the bed, just there: right there. Maaike legs were around him, while he held her against the wall. He sucked the skin of her neck, positioning himself. She kissed and suckled his face when she had the chance. He smelled of smoke and tasted so... salty.

Finally grabbing her hips,  to get more suitable position, Brynjolf thrust his cock inside of her heat with great strength; she was wet but the lack of foreplay made the sensation bit rougher. 

And she _loved_ it.

His fingertips were rubbing her skin while he worked on her. He needed to touch her and to feel her and her body automatically responded to him; She was open to him, and only to him. Maaike swore she had come more than a few times during their session.

He was rough, but not completely in charge; they were possessive of each other and wanted massage, touch and kiss everything on them! She made the meeting of their bodies even stronger by meeting his thrusts with her hips wanting to find the absolute peak of their union.

Brynjolfs' movement was rough and deep, speed changing depending to her responses; she moaned with cracks in her voice and he tried held his owns in but sometimes his moans came out as shattering breaths. She felt as she was spreading so greatly. The wooden wall behind her scratched her back, but it didn't matter; it increased the heat. Her hands were on his back, scratching too.

When they were close to coming, Maaike took a handful of his hair and pulled him into a kiss; he obliged and brushed few of her loose black locks away from her face. They came together, he inside her, with their voices muffling in each others' mouths. 

 

The waves of their orgasms faded off, little by little. They gave little kisses to each other, until they were completely spent. 

 

 

 

 

Later they had ended up sitting on the floor, leaning their backs against the wall. Brynjolf had his trousers back on and he had given his shirt to Maaike to wear. She had leaned her head against his shoulder, and he had his arms around her. One of his hands stroked her hair, admiring the beauty of it. Black ebony..

"I always lov-- admired your hair."

Maaike raised her head to look at him. He was staring at the fireplace with a thoughtful look. It was rare to hear him stumble upon his words. "Oh? How so?"

"Fishing for compliments, are we lass?"

She gave out a wicked grin, quipping her eyebrow. "Would it be so bad?" She purred.

Brynjolf chuckled, and was left with a half-smile. "Your hair was one of the first things that caught my attention. Ebon black. And it turned out your hair was as messy as you are." He grinned and turned his gaze on her.

Playfully, she slapped his chest. " _Very tactful_ , ser Brynjolf."

His expression stayed the same, even if it softened up a bit. "Always." Brynjolf wanted to compliment her scent, her eyes, her lips, her figure, etc.. But his appreciation towards these things stopped him... Or the fact that he valued her spirit the most. It was most... unexpected.

They were like that for a while, looking the fireplace. Maaike felt good, comfortable, warm. 

 

Content.

 

 

"Bryn?"

"Yes lass?"

"The first you kissed me, at the river, you told me we'd see where we'll end up..."

"I did."

Maaike turned to look at him again with a bright smile. "I never expected it would mean this... But I am glad."

He returned a smile of his own. "Me too. It's good you stuck around." Their lips met again in one soft and tender kiss. 

They didn't speak anything else. Hours later, Maaike had fallen asleep, so Bryjolf carried her onto the bed and went to sleep next to her, pulling covers over them.

 

 

There was ache in his heart. Something he didn't recognize: Good and bad at the same time. As if breathing had never been easier... But at the same time it was so close to breaking.

Only thing he knew about it, was that he wasn't going to let it go.... Or let it be. 

Not that easily.

 

 

 

 

 

****

 

 

 

 

 Maaike woke up early and started to dress up her Guild armors. Brynjolf woke up soon after her and did the same. She had skipped leaving to Solitude yesterday, so she'd have to leave as soon as possible. But she was not going to leave before talking to Bynjolf and eating something. 

 

"Ugh for f... I know you are in here!" She searched her kitchens' cabinet.  _Where the hell is it?!_

"You looking for cheese again lass?" Brynjolf said, amused by her, and walked over to the table. He was fully dressed now.

"No, I already found that and put it onto the table genius! No, I  _am_ looking for my sweetroll!"

He quipped his eyebrow. "Let me guess: Someone stole your-"

Maaike pointed her finger of accusation at him. "One. More. Word."

Grinning, he surrendered. 

"Oh screw this. It's probably messed up anyway." She sat down onto the table and started eating breakfast.

 

They discussed her new mission. Maaike got the impression Brynjolf didn't like Gulum-Ei. Though how could she blame him? 'Former' contacts were like former-girlfriends.

Brynjolf told her that the man was stubborn, slippery, and... kind of simple. Exact words were "That Argonian couldn't find his tail with both hands". No mastermind, but apparently still good scammer.

She would deal with the lizard, that wouldn't be a problem. Maaike knew Guild wanted him alive and make him profitable for them and she knew how to get it done.

But in her mind was the question Mercer didn't answer: What motivation do these guys have? To take over their business? To just take the Guild down 'cause why not? Maaike expressed her question to Brynjolf and admitted his own curiosity, but was pretty sure they just wanted to be The New King of the mountain. Maaike had her doubts...

_We'll find out soon enough._

 

After eating she went to get her stuff and prepared to leave. 

Brynjolf took a relaxed position on his chair. "Leaving already?"

Maaike closed her backpack and grinned. "On the contrary to a popular belief, I am actually quite dedicated worker."

"Oh I know. You are very  _hard_ working woman." Bryn smirked, suggestive tone in his voice.

She rolled her eyes at him, changing her posture into something teasing.  "What a professional you are! I assure you, if I ever apply to another job I will not ask for your recommendation."

"You sure 'bout that? You of all people should know how good I am at buttering people up."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you say dear."

 

Brynjolf stood up and approached her from behind, and bestowed a kiss on her cheek. "Don't loose your purse, lass. I'd hate to track it down for ya."

Maaike smirked and looked over her shoulder, into his eyes. "Aww you mean you'd do that for me?"

He shrugged. "I suppose I have to, in order to keep my 'perks'."

"Few more words honey, and you might lose more than your  _perks_."

Brynjolf chuckled and gave a quick peck on her lips. "You've always been quite the storm, haven't you?"

"That's what makes me so magnificent."

"True enough." He stepped back. "Have fun lass, and try to leave something standing behind you."

Maaike laughed while opening the door. "For you darling, anything! Just lock the door when you leave." She blew him a kiss, then closed the door behind her.

 

Brynjolf shook his head, widely smiling.  _What a woman._

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 "Wait here girl, this shouldn't take too long ok? Don't do anything I wouldn't." 

Monica was eating her apples, and was too pleased to start acting difficult. Maaike smiled, giving her few last pats before getting a move on.

 

Solitude was a beautiful city, as far as cities in Skyrim went. There was something so charming about the buildings' architecture... Quite elegant. And the ongoing winter made things even more of a sight; Maaike found herself loving winter. Cold and quiet, with warm and inviting Inn nearby.

Still, being here, surrounded by Imperial legion, made her nervous: Invading Thalmor Embassy hadn't exactly earned her many political friends... And Delphine had never been her friend. Fortunately, there shouldn't be anyone who'd be able to identify her. 

Maaike wondered. What tactic, what way... Perhaps just talking would cut it, but if not...

She'd use some speak  **louder**.

Maaike entered Inn Gulum-Ei was staying in, smiling mischievously. She immediately identified her target and like a hunter, she walked closer to her pray. A great zeal rose along her spine; A zeal and excitement of a Dragon slayer... or a thief.

_Once again the show begins._

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to give me feedback :P I'm quite sure there is room for improvement.


	21. A Gift of inconvenience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maaike can't help it: Her secrets are coming to light no matter how she tries to hide it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally it's here! Whew. I am not most pleased with this chapter, but there it is. Not all moments are grand right? 
> 
> But I am happy I got it done now, cause you know what? I am better! The sickness? It has weakened me but worst has been defeated.
> 
> It happened so suddenly, but here I am. After so long time of suffering I feel like I am content and hopeful. This gave me energy to paint, draw, write, be with friends, even contact school and make arrangements so I can continue doing my studies.
> 
> I don't know what future brings but you know... No one does.
> 
> You guys have given me such wonderful comments us support which helped me a lot :) So everyone reading this, I want you to know how glad you made me, and how much light you brought me in my dark hours. 
> 
> Thank you all, you are awesome!
> 
> ....Aaand I hope you are gonna enjoy my chapter :P

 

 

 

 

 "...I swear by Dibellas' tits, if I weren't ordered to let him live, I'd shove his slippery goddamn tail up his ass until it comes out of his scale friggen' mouth..." Maaike murmured  under her breath, quietly swimming  past hired guards.

Since talking to Gulum-Ei at the Winking Skeever, she had killed fifteen guards, twenty hirelings and at least five frostbite spiders, all in the name of following that scaly-uncooperative-bastard. After the last kill, she decided that killing all of them would take too much time and noise so she chose to swim.

Figures the East Empire company had such strong defense... And cold waters. 

_Cold as in 'daggers ripping through your flesh' without actually killing you. Divines, mother nature... You are such bitches._

 

Maaike had "persuaded" Gulum-Ei to talk, but he only  revealed second-hand information that didn't help at all. Plus, it was positive he knew more than he was letting on. Maaike could have intimidated him, but too many people and chances for him to run. 

So she chose to follow him, until his back was against the wall, giving him no choice but to talk. Might have been far fetched plan, considering she wasn't sure where he was heading. But it turned out he was going to his own secret warehouse in a weird-watery-ass-cave, or whatever, so even if he wouldn't talk Maaike  could still search the place and discover some kind of lead.

_But for fucks sake, this better be worth it... All my scrolls are shit from this cold goddamn water..._

 

After a lot of swimming, and a few illusion spells, she managed to reach end of the cave without being noticed . Gulum-Ei was there, addressing some random mercenaries. 

Maaike thought on it; She still had enough magicka to paralyze her opponents, leaving Gulum-Ei unprotected. But she wasn't certain of his own abilities... There still were some guards around here and she shouldn't alert them.

"Did you here something?" They heard her.

_Crap._

Rolling her eyes, she got out of the water. 

_Improvising is more fun anyways._

Gulum-Ei noticed her right away and stepped back, letting his guards attack her, so improvising really was the only option. 

 

Maaike listened to her insticts: This kill needed to be quick. Summoning the powers of destruction magic in each hand, she looked at her opponents.

"Time die little birdie!" One of them yelled, running towards her and raising his sword to strike: two men, preparing to slash their swords at her at the same time.

_Time to die scumbags._

It was then when Maaike released a powerful ice storm, ravaging and crackling the poor opposition of two men. It wasn't as powerful as a shout, but enough to kill them instantly.

The power of magic always left her sparkly. The feeling of absolute and pure power was overwhelming and intoxicating: It left her smiling wickedly.

Gulum-Ei was left dumbfounded, his lizard eyes in shock. Maaike grinned and walked over the bodies of fallen men. She must have looked quite terrifying from his perspective, because knelt down on the ground as a sing of surrender... Or submission.

She couldn't help herself; she let out a wicked sounding giggle. 

The lizard was getting desperate. "Now, there is no need to do anything rash."

"Oh really?" She said joyfully, "You have hoarded your own treasure here, declined to cooperate and what else? Oh, how about all that goddamn security, attacking me on sight? Not friendly guards, but ordered to kill. I had to dispatch so many of them and now my gear is dirtied from all the blood. And swimming in the cold water didn't do any good: Not for my clothes nor to my mood."

_I just love long elaborations. Making people know their situation._

"This isn't as bad as it seems! I was going to tell Mercer about everything, honestly! Please... he'll have me killed!"

"There is no place cold enough in this freezing country, that could save you from my burning wrath if you don't give me what I want! So For the last time," Maaike took hold of Gulum-Ei's collar, pressing a dagger to his throat, "Who hired you?!"

"Karliah! Her name is Karliah!" The sniveling lizard yelled out.

 

 

Things went interesting. Gulum-Ei went on to explain everything he knew, and telling all about this Karliah.

This woman murdered the former Guildmaster Gallus, the man who Brynjolf had mentioned few times as the man who brought him to the guild. Mercer was able to escape with his life and took leadership.

Karliah was angry at them; Towards Mercer. She was back to finish the job or just settle scores... Who knew what roamed in a murderers' mind?

But what was interesting to Maaike, was that she kind of understood now: Sure, Mercer was still an ass but it is hard to learn how to trust others when the ones closest to you betray you... 

And do something unforgivable. Like... Ulmer. 

She shook her head.  _No. We were never that close._

Gulum-Ei said Karliah was somewhere "where the end began" wherever that was. Mercer might know the meaning.

He went on to offer his services, as an exchange for his life. And like Brynjolf had instructed, Gulum-Ei served the Guild and did business with them once again.

_Wow.. The ally in the north... What an coward! I could barely keep up, so fast did he spill his secrets._

_...And that sounded weird._

Mission was a complete success, though it left Maaike puzzled. There was more to this all, something she wasn't able to understand. She'd have to talk to Brynjolf about it.

But for now....

_I need a strong drink... And to clean up. Ugh. To the Winking Skeever!_

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Brynjolf had put more attention on Mercers activities. The middle-aged Guildmaster had earned his trust a long time ago, but never was he to be underestimated. Many people had learned the truth hard way. Brynjolf himself had just observed this. That's why he was Mercers' second; He saw and remembered. Did his job, if you have to have it. He accepted that Maaike didn't tell him everything, but it didn't make the whole issue hidden. No, it was constantly in his mind, wandering all over his head and heart.

He frowned. Mercer was, by very definition a steadfast man. Once his goal was set, Divines save the one in his path for nothing was going to keep him at bay-- And any obstacle would be destroyed.

Was that what Maaike was to the man? An obstacle? No, couldn't be. How could she, valuable asset to them and by far one of the most skilled people on Thedas, be an obstacle? Then again she was mysterious person, a woman with many secrets. Secrets she didn't entrust him with. And that made it worse...

Because in this little thing, she was like Mercer: Neither of them consulted him about this, even after all he was to them, and most of all both of them were overwhelmingly strong.

Brynjolf took a sip of his drink. He desperately needed it. And as the alcohol rose in his head, so did a new scenario.

Maaike and Mercer.. Those two were similar in secrets even if the secrets themselves differed from each other. If Maaike wasn't an obstacle, then what? Competition, rival? Or something else...

The very thoughtmade Brynjolf shudder:

What if Maaike was the  **goal**? If Mercer, a man of ambition, was not able to reach his goal, he would be enraged like any man denied his pray. And that was just it!

Mercer was a man and not just any kind of man: _A thief._ That much he knew.

But who was Maaike  _really_?

 

"Hey Brynjolf, gotta minute?"

Brynjolf woke up from his thoughts. It was Etienne. Currently they were the only ones in the Flagon.

"Aye, take a seat. So what do you got for me?"

Etienne shook his head. "Nah, this'll be quick. I'm actually just dropping by, trying to find Maaike. She here?"

Brynjolf was getting tense.  _Looks like everyone is thinking of her._ He leaned back on his chair, giving Etienne a neutral gaze. "She left for a job at Solitude. Why, you have a message for her or something?"

"Not.... exactly. Just I've been meaning to give her something. You know, as a thank you for she has done for me, but it seems I never get the chance to talk to her. I hope she ain't avoiding me."

"A thank you? From  _you_? Huh, what did she do?" Brynjolf quipped his eyebrow.

Etiennes' eyes widened. "You mean you-- I mean I figured you two were, you know, close--- I thought you, of all grunts around here, knew?"

"...of what? What are you on about lad?"

Etienne was quiet for a second. Then he let out a murmur. "I guess I'll be taking that seat after all."

 

 

 

 

 ***

 

 

 

"Whew, that one was  _strong_!" Coughed Maaike.

She had bought some ale and sweets from the Inn, but chose to start her journey back to Riften. The news were big, and it shouldn't be delayed. When it was midnight, she stopped to make up a camp. Now, she was drinking and resting in front of the campfire, while snow poured out of the sky.

_At least it's not raining._

Monica was resting quietly nearby. Such a good horse. Such a good companion.

Alcohol send her to a realm of calm and softness: Every sore muscle felt relaxed and her body was warming up in the cold Skyrim night. For a moment she let herself wonder back into the memories of old, but happy times, which she would avoid in a sober state. 

There indeed were happy moments.

 

Maaike had been a mercenary leader, with Monica as her foulmouthed sister and second-in-command: natural thief. They were a loud squad, but they stuck together. Foxy was a witty and wicked Khajiit, with the best aim one could find. Junior, an old man. Master of heavy armor but had a way with magic too. He had taught her most of what she knew. And Antonio! Clever kid with such reflexes and potential though old-man would never have admitted it.

And then Carl, her old flame though never a true love for her. Half-nord, hald-redguard who would have wanted to start a family with her, which differed from her plans. She with his child? Nothing she would plan with kind of separated their ideals but didn't break their 'thing'.

Carl also possessed a warriors 'honor' or so he claimed. It was one of the many things she found herself lacking these days. Back then she thought she had honor but it was replaced by guilt which had tortured her for a long time.

But now? Brynjolf had fixed that. Sure, there are things that might always haunt her, but there was light here too.

_In a weird, thieving shadowy way._

Maaike raised her bottle to look at it. Before, she would drink it to sate her pain to be numb so sleeping would be easier. Now it was a delightful companion, the one you'd hate next morning but always have fun with.

She grinned.  _This is just lame. I am lame. Let it be, suck it up, and get some sleep idiot: Ale is getting to your head._

With that, the brief wind of nostalgia was gone. 

Tomorrow, there would be a nice painful hangover on its' place.

"Good night Monica! If ya'll need me, I'll be sleepin' right over hear!"

Getting into her tent and in a warm bedroll had never felt so grand. 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

  _Maaike was smiling at the view. Many people would shiver just by thinking about climbing on top of  Throat of the World, but for her the chills were the breeze of live, making her feel alive again._

_After Alduins' death, Champion of Sovngarde had send her there; No higher goal to achieve but all the world under her, at her feet. Traveling to a land beyond was a feat on itself but this was more natural thrill._

_All went to Sovngarde to meet their eternity in death. But ironically, her journey send her back, reborn and ready to start anew._

 

 _Paarthurnax had roared his sorrowful songs, as a sing of eternal friendship and recognition for her._ _Paarthurnax... Among the only dragons she grew to like: Wings that took you to the sky, never betraying._

 

_It was there, on the Throat of the World, to Paarthurnaxes' care,  where she left her sword: Slayer of Dragons, itself made of the bones of its' pray. Akatosh himself must have been with Maaike, when she crafted it on twilight, at the Skyforge._

 

_For a moment she was a dragon: Maaike jumped. She was certain she could fly, everything felt so light and strong at the same time._

 

_But once she blinked she found herself somewhere completely different but no less greater joy:_

_In the safe embrace of Brynjolf. This man was a scoundrel, a dark mist gracefully sweeping through the shadows. They placed kisses of affection upon each other, marking them as their own: Free and one. Close and united._

_But never strangled._

_Gripping him, she refused to let go._

_And together, everything fell to the void._

 

 

 

_***_

 

 

 

Maaike woke up all suddenly, morning sun barely on the sky, with snowing having finally stopped. She looked around, finding herself alone with only Monica nearby, lacking the person she had just seen in her dream. It felt like she was in rags, left for dead.

 It was weird waking up without a comfort beside her, that nagging personality who hoarded all the pillows. Maaike frowned. She found herself missing Brynjolfs' touch, his voice and most of all she ached for his presence. And they hadn't been that long apart.

Feeling in her heart was like tiny painful needles, spreading boiling blood inside her veins. Now she kinda wanted to vomit, and it wasn't the hangover. She had never  felt like this before... Not so strongly anyways. What the hell was it? Human 'emotions' were weird. Too much trouble and complication.

"Monica, if I was going crazy, would you be able to tell?" She asked, turning her head towards her horse.

The horse stayed quiet, head down

"Oh c'mon! You are a smart horse, give me your best guess."

Monica raiser her head a bit, looking at her master strangely.

"Yeah, I thoughts so."

And the horses head was back down.

Maaike throw her hands up in surrender: "Fine! Be like that! We'll get a move on anyways."

 

After backing up camp they continued their journey back to Riften. It didn't take them too long to travel since both of them were in their full strengths. The winter was getting stronger with each day. Places such as Winterhold, and the Pale were overrun by frozen body parts. Luckily the Rift was kinder to those who were not so used to this atmosphere.

Snow was beautiful though. The only soft and coarse thing in Tamriel.

Maaike gave few pats on Monica before waving goodbyes. "Be a good gal while mommy is gone, okay?" With that, she left the stables.

_Next destination, Cistern. Gotta get this information to Mercer so I can get paid and drunk._

 

But immediately when she stepped inside the thieves haven, something in the air twitched; As if she could smell the tenseness in the air.

 "Hey girl, it's good to see you! We heard there was quite a show at the East Empire company, figured that meant you did good. Right?"

Maaike turned to see Rune on her left, though the voice gave him away. Such a polite man, always ready to babble until everyone knew for sure he wasn't being rude to them in any possible way.

"Yeah, I got the job done. I only need to report to Mercer so I can get my cut."

Rune look quickly to the floor, to look at his boots, "Ah, he isn't here currently but said he'd be back tomorrow." He raised his eyes back to hers. 

 _For fucks sake, that just figures! I run like hell, do all the goddamn work, hurry back with results like a good little courier boy at the ass end of nowhere and he isn't even here?!_  

Maaike rolled her eyes, then cheering up. "Well it's not like Delvin doesn't own me a drink. I'll wait at the Flagon, drinking with other peoples money. You wanna come?"

The boy was bit baffled by her quick change of attitude, bringing his hand to massage his neck. He was clearly nervous. Cute.

"I, uhh, sure. I'd like that." He smiled awkwardly, changing his posture.

"Great, lets get a move on before I star to get some withdrawals." She smiled, overly sweetly and starting to walk.

But Rune stopped her which made her look at him with question. "Wait, look, you should know that uhh, Etienne was looking for you, wanting to give you something."

Maaike quipped her eyebrow. "Oh?"  _For some reason I don't like the sound of this._

"He searched for you, asking everyone when you might come back an so on."

"....Oookay, then why do you sound so ominous?" 

Rune looked away, tiny embarrassment rising on his face. "This kinda feels like it is not for me to say.."

"For.... Rune! Buddy! You went on this far right? Don't leave me hanging." She tried to add some humor in her voice, but her back was getting rigid. 

_Etienne and Maven were one of the only links to her past year as a Dragonborn. Any contact with them was, and would be, worrisome._

But now Rune was encouraged enough. He looked at her, into her eyes. "Vekel saw him talking to Brynjolf about it. He didn't hear what they discussed exactly but Brynjolf looked quite disturbed.... As in ready to either punch anything or as in shock, Vekel wasn't sure but Etienne had quite the story."

 _Shit. Shit shit shit._ "Then what?"

"Brynjolf just rushed away, saying he had an urgent mission to be done. Apparently Etienne even tried to hold him back but Brynjolf was already gone."

 

 

Maaikes' world spun.  _What the hell what the hell what the hell---_

So much things were mixed up so quickly. Maaike wasn't ready to tell Brynjolf about the whole Dragonborn thing, especially when it came to the Thalmor Embassy fiasco! How would Guild feel that they have someone like her with them? Good?? Bah! She might be a liability if Thalmor found her with them.

She had been planning to tell Brynjolf more about her past,  _someday_ , but it was too soon! Not to mention it was someone ELSE telling Brynjolf about her.

_Oi Mistress of luck, you are such a whore. Someday, I'll get you on a bender._

 

 

_Why can't things be easy, just once?!_

 "Oh there you are, I've been looking all over for you and then waiting forever!"

Maaike and Rune both turned their gazes to the source of this voice: 

Etienne Rarnis. The Devil itself.

Maaike walked past Rune right in front of Etienne, ice cold eyes locking on him quietly, her voice speaking timidly: "I hear you have been looking for me. So what is on your mind." Not a question but a demand.

Though he seemed oblivious to it. "Yes. I know you might not like me or my company, given the circumstances how we met but-"

And that was enough, she raised her hand to stop him. "Just... Get to the point please."

"Oh! Yeah, sure. I wanted to give you something. A thank you gift for all you have done."

Cold feeling run through her spine. She needed to be sure. "You mean from..."  _Please don't say what I think you are gonna say...._

 

He quipped his eyebrows. "Yes. A thank you gift for saving me from the Thalmor. Brynjolf said he was sure you'd like it."

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support! Hopefully you'll enjoyed yourselves. I am open for feedback, like always.
> 
> Happy times for all yer' guys!


	22. Birth of Uncertainty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is easier to argue, when it is with someone familiar while being worried for them at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thank you all, for not forgetting me, and I honestly have been amazed by all the support! <3 Thank you so much.
> 
> I apologize for the wait. I am afraid to say anything about how often I'll be making updates or about my well-being. It seems to change so often. But rest assured, it has been a hell lot worse. At least I can some-what do my studies.
> 
> Hopefully you'll enjoy this tho :) Not the most impressive chapter, but there you go.

 

 

 

 

"You told Brynjolf fucking  **what?!** " Maaike took hold of Etiennes' collar and pushed him against the wall. "Did it fucking occur to you, that there was a  _reason_ Brynjolf didn't know? Or that maybe, just fucking maybe, I wanted to tell him the story BY myself!? This is a private affair, you piece of-"

Rune tried to hold Maaike back, putting his hand on her shoulder. "Hey easy there! This won't solve anything. You ain't one to---"

But she would have non of it, she simply shrugged Runes' hand off, never taking her eyes off of Etienne, who was too shocked to react. 

"B..but I thought... I was there too! At the embassy I mean--- Gah!-- For Mara's sake, I only told-" He was interrupted by Maaikes' snarl.

"Shut it! Those people are not some basic marks we get from Delvin or Vex! They are the _fucking_ Thalmor! You claim you are thankful, but you show it by sabotaging my relationship! "

"I've done no such thing!" Etienne growled, his senses picking up. "What's the harm? I was the one being tortured for months, not you! I simply told Brynjolf why I am so grateful to you. How can you not get that you b---" luckily (for him) he wasn't able to finish.

Maaike was about to punch Etienne, her anger blinding her so greatly, but Rune pulled her harshly away, putting one hand on her shoulder. "That's enough!" He forced her to look him in the eye. "This won't solve anything!"

 

 

Maaike was about to say something, but was interrupted by Sapphire who had just now walked beside them. "What's going on here? And _why_ is Etienne looking like he has a skeever in his pants?"

 Maaike didn't answer, almost as if she hadn't even noticed Sapphire (or plainly ignoring her), just walked few steps away from them. She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead with her fingertips. Her nervousness would give her a headache.

 

It was true though. Etienne had been tortured for a long time. Maaike would never know what Thalmor had done to him and for a second she might have felt a tiny bit guilt over how she had treated him...

But he really had been really stupid, thinking her past is something safe to share.. Like _a fucking_ gossip. Whatever sympathy she had for him, was overwhelmed.

It angered and confused her even more: Anger was, in the end, selfish.

 _I need to think I need to think---  Shit shit shit. Is this a problem? It feels like problem!_ Her thoughts circled around her mind so fast, she barely understood what she was actually thinking about. Her heart was beating so fast she was able to hear it and her breathing became difficult: She was breathing but the air didn't feel... enough. As if she was suffocating. 

Maaike kept her eyes closed and barely realized that Sapphire was next to her, trying to reach out to her. Her surroundings became a blur.

Sapphire talked intensively to Etienne and Rune, but what she talked about was currently foreign to her, as if everything was spinning.

_My connection to the Thalmor... Liability... Trouble.. Shit... Fuck... Damn..  They'll see me as trouble... Enemy... Bryns' gonna be mad... I lied, I avoided, I never told... Shit..._

Shaking herself awake, she forced herself to clear up.

_Think, think.... Next step, what's the next step? Is there loose ends? Sources to verify I'm trustworthy? Anything besides that loudmouth Etienne...?_

Suddenly Maaike shot her eyes open with an idea.

_Shit! That's right! The perfect source of reassurances!! Why didn't I think about that before?!_

Sapphire, Rune and Etienne were cut off from their intense conversation when Maaike spinned around and practically stomped to their side. 

Maaike directed her eyes sharply at Etiennes', her gaze throwing icy daggers towards him. "Etienne, you will keep your mouth  **shut** and  _never_ discuss my private affairs again. DO this and I'll really put some work into being more considerate of you... I do understand torture and your gratitude for being free...  **HOWEVER,** if you  _dare_ to pull more of this shit regardless, I will personally feed you to that crazed "chef" at the ratway vaults... So **stuff** your 'thank you'-gifts!" She snarled. Her tone alone gave everyone a pause.

Etienne blinked twice, swallowing. Then he gave a careful nod.

Maaike immediately turned to look at Rune and Sapphire. "I'd appreciate if you never bring this up again. This is something that is no longer part of my life, and I will keep it that way, so please...."

There was nothing for Rune and Sapphire to say. What could they? Not like they'd arguing. Maaike had too damn stormy look in her eyes.

 

 

 Maaike sighed in relief. "I have few inquiries to make. I'll see you around." 

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

 " Wasn't what I offered enough already? Do I _need_ to repeat myself?" Maven grumbled, standing up from her chair: "You have a lot of nerve girl, demanding answers from me."

There were three people, in this room (Jarls' private dining quarters): Maaike, Jarl Maven and Maul; The man stood like a mountain next to Maven. Their expressions weren't bright. Just suspicious and entitled. 

_Embodiment of vanity. Figures._

It wasn't just 'worry' or 'stress' that got Maaike here. She needed to  _know_...

 Maaike stood before the new Jarl of Riften, hiding her nerves behind her cold eyes. She didn't show any weakness, nor even swallowing before talking. This woman knew Thalmor, and Maaike sensed how Maven respected their power, but was devious enough to have her own agenda. In a way she was indeed a very (as difficult it was to imagine) nord-like woman: Not interested in petty chit-chat, unless there was a real point to it. Very straightforward, at least with those she wasn't trying to fool or manipulate... 

A Jarl who would not share her power 'nor her assets with anyone else... Not even with the Thalmor. That was something Maaike counted on. Last time they talked, Maven had given Maaike the benefit of her protection, but had never actually told her her position...  nor had she promised to keep the Thalmor away... Lady Black-Brirar had simply implied it.

"Nerve? No. Self-preservation? Yes." She sighed, and took the liberty of stepping forward, closer to Maven. "I am here for one reason only: to know, how Thalmor view some current state. I am not paranoid enough to foresee myself disappearing. Had my identity been compromised, I wouldn't be here. But for the sake of the Guild and myself, I must know. And with you being the only one I know, who can provide me with any clue on this matter..." Maaike trailed off. She held her breath, watching Mavens' movement closely.

But Lady Black-Briars' face betrayed nothing. Her face only growing more bitter. For a second Maaike wondered if she made a mistake. _No. There is no room for that kind of thinking. Maven despises that._

"You speak as if Guild was your main worry. Are you going to claim they sent you?"

Maaike shook her head. "No. I am here on my own."

"What's give you the idea, you have any stature to do that? I owe you nothing and nor am I your errand boy. Just because I recognize your feats, doesn't mean you are above all."

 

Maaike felt bit anger, but kept it in check. She took few sharp steps forward, which caused Maul to draw his sword. Maaike stopped on her place, looking directly at the tall man. 

"You are in the presence of Jarl Maven. Keep your distance." He grunted.

"Sheath your sword this once! I have no patience for any interference from you, while I am discussing business!"

"As you say lady Maven."

 

Maaike would have grinned when the man obeyed his mistress, if she hadn't known it would have made things worst.

"Lady Black-Briar, I have no interest in talking shit around the bush, so I will put it plainly: Last time we discussed business, we saw eye to eye. I believe this is because we both see the world for what it is. I'm not here to collect a reward. I want to ensure a smooth future.. Like you agreed last time... Our cooperation would be most prosperous... "

The Jarl seemed tense. "And?"

Maaike inhaled deeply, her eyes nailing Maven on her place. It wasn't Maaike speaking: It was the Dragonborn with low and strong voice. "So I ask you my lady, do want to see eye to eye with me?" 

 

Maven turned her back on Maaike. Deep in thought. The silence went on for what seemed eternity... Then she turned back and talked:

"Very well."

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Pacing around her house, she waited. Maven would deliver any information to her as soon as she was able, but rest assured, Maaike was safe. The thing she awaited was Brynjolf. Sapphire and Rune had volunteered to send word if they'd see him.

_Why even care so badly? Ma said it would only mean--- No. Those kind of things are not inevitable. I care because-- Ugh... But he is special tho..._

She was angry and confused. Her thoughts didn't let up.

_Goddamnit. Is he angry? Why should he?! It's not like I am obligated to REPORT myself.... He will brush it away, most likely!! He has never had stick up his ass! I am making too big deal of this..._

Though no matter what Maaike said to herself, it only filled her up with anxiety and fury. Would this be a problem? Thalmor were dangerous, and she was not on their 'friend list'. And they'd like her even  _less_ if they knew she was Dragonborn, because they must have assumed she was buddy to the Blades... their old, hated enemies... 

Last thing the Guild needed was to be caught harboring a fugitive. Etienne might have been forgiven, but he was not the one who started all the fuss at the Embassy.

Thoughts, doubts, worries, _fear_ , anxiety, depression, anger, abandonment, sadness, laughter.

Maaike sank to the floor, on her knees, and just screamed: Not out of shock, or as if she had suddenly been surprised with a fright, but out of overload. The emotions stung in her stomach, choking her lungs and blocking all noise out of her ears. 

She screamed, with a hoarse, scratching tone. It had been such a long time, but  _true_ emotions were out of her control. She made her hand into a fist and punched the floor.

Dragons' screamed within her.. Souls she had consumed, had left a great scar in her own psyche. Tiny worry was like a drop in a lake, setting waves. Maaikes' barriers wavered when she shouted.

_Such a little thing, no big deal. Why why why.. It is not a big deal..._

Everything went blank for a while. She saw and knew what was happening but didn't understand it. Memories, thoughts, anxieties... She had experienced this 'state of mind' before, but always forgot it... until it happened again.

_...hate hate hate..._

 

 

Maaike woke up with a headache. She was on her bed, with her armor still on. It was dawn, and sun was starting to lit up her bedroom. She was confused, because she felt like she had been drinking but she obviously hadn't had any.

_What the hell happened..._

She hadn't lost control to her emotions, she just didn't know how to come to terms with them nor did she know how to accomplish it. Maaike was most terrified over the fact that she din't know or understand what was going on. No one had ever explained these things to her!

But the great mess around her explained a lot. She must have been _shouting_. 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Vekel throws very used up towel into the fireplace. He was getting frustrated. "You ought to pay for the last couple of rounds! I've been giving you a pass, but if you don't give me coin now you won't be served. That's the drill."

Etienne got defensive: "Please, give me a break. I've been between jobs, but the last one was a bummer-- Not to mention I almost got skinned today", he whined.

"..One you had coming" Sapphire growled bitterly. It was clear whose side she was on.

"Yes-- I heard something about infamous beating up you got from Maaike and no-- I don't _know_ what it was about, I don't _want_ to know what it was about and most certainly don't _care_. Now pay up you useless shite or I'll let Dirge smash yer' head around and then toss you away!"

Etienne paid begrudgingly.

 "Hey speakin' of the devil, have you lot seen the woman? Minx has been buggin' me all week for more jobs and now that I got more than I can handle, she is givin' me cold shoulder?" Delvin shook his head, and practically pouring mead in his mouth.

Sapphire quipped her eyebrow. "She didn't swing by already? It's midday."

"You gettin' deaf girl? Nah, she ain't been around since yesterday. Perhaps havin' some heart-to-heart with her sweetie pie."

 

"No." Someone slurred with certain a certain amount of open frustration.

 

Everyone in the room turned to look for source of this word. Etienne was first one to leave ( _very_ quickly). Delvin was first to answer however.

"Goddamn' Brynjolf, that serious eh? Come and get another pint, that'll sort it all out! Afterwards you could settle all-whatsoever-business with mistress but better not keep her waitin' too long: that one is scrappy."

Who else could it have even been? He was only one with that accent. Uncommon even for a Nord.

Brynjolf immediately inhaled deeply, his muscles tightening: " **Enough** ". He had never snarled out such an outburst so all people around went quiet. Brynjolfs' sea-blue eyes had flamed up into a storm of frustration, stress... and why wouldn't they?  _He_ had done so much for them all. To the _Guild_. It wasn't like Mercer was telling them anything They should be quiet.

But they didn't. His drunken state became even more clear.

Vekel put down a mug he was cleaning. "Look, you seem woozy. Get some shuteye before Mercer comes in. You don't need this at the moment buddy and you know it."

Dismissing away bartenders recommendations and crabbing a bottle of ale, Brynjolf sat down next to Sapphire who had deeper frown than usually. There were a lot of questions in the air, piquing everyone's interest: About Maaike, Brynjolf, their affairs, and the Guilds' connection to them. Brynjolf would definitely get drunk because of a rough day, perhaps even humiliate himself in front of others, but _never_ because of a lover.

 

Before Brynjolf could order, Sapphire leaned in and engaged him: "Go. To. See.  **Her**."

If his eyes weren't dark enough already, they now competed with Mercers' death-stare. Ironic. He had been showed that face often... lately more than before. He meant it though. "What is it, that when I say something, people do differently?" It was a weird setting. Brynjolf was one figure of authority within the guild. Usually he was doing all talking.

"What is the issue with you? I get that you are pissed and from the looks of it, also very tired. I've got no idea what you've been up to nor' do I know Maaike's state. Just go and get it over with. I'd hate to see her unhappy."

She took him by surprise. No one had ever heard her talk so fondly of someone. Brynjolf was about to say something, but then changed his mind. He stood up, drank down his drink and put the emptied bottle on the table. 

"Mind your business." He didn't even look at her when he talked. 

 

Sapphire's face was blank when he left. Others were leaving as well, while she stayed on her place in empty silence. 

Only Delvin seemed to notice her absence of mind.  _There's somethin' familiar about that girl,_ he thought.

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

_Maaike saw herself laying on a bed, her clothes ripped apart. Paralysis poison was starting ware off, but she didn't move. Not even a little. First feeling was filthy, then weak, utterly powerless... Pain.. And then finally empty._

_Screams had finally stopped. Were her friends even alive anymore? Unlikely. Ulmer's seed, that sickening liquid, was slipping out of her. For a time Maaike had believed she couldn't have children... But there was always a chance. What if she'd  conceive? With **his** child? Even if he'd let her live, would she be his sex slave or a breeding pet? Perhaps just a payment for his soldiers._

_And if she'd escape.... What could she do if she was pregnant? How was someone in her circumstances supposed to react???_

_Horror, unimaginable. Even worse than physical pain she felt: Like tiny, long needles sinking into every inch of her body._

_"Well honey, your buddies downstairs are being prepared for a next round. Would you like me to get one of 'em as a audience for... our next round? Perhaps the old man! He was like a... father figure to you right? Wouldn't that be cute, Papa seeing his little girl all grown up and making bad decisions?"_

_A single tear dropping from the corner of her eye, Maaike barely managed to make out a word  "Go... Fuck.... yourself..." she finally managed to spit out._

_Bitter laughter on his behalf. "Well your boyfriend  won't be doing that anymore... Might as well show him what he'll be missing?" With that he leaped upon her, and started the_

  _Darkness again. Why was that girl so weak? Where was Monica?  What have been **done** to her?!_

_Emotions of distress. Mind numbing hatred, lungs unable to breathe, a blockage in your throat, stimulation in your fingers yearning to kill....._

 

 

_What was left of Monica. Maaike had sliced many bodies in her life. But seeing intestines of someone dear being wrapped around their neck like a scarf--_

 

 

 

 

 

Maaike woke up again: not with a scream, but in a fright. Seeing something many times kinda took the worst edge out of it but it was still.. dreadful. Headache was horrible too. Looking around, she could not find any bottle. 

_No alcohol then... No hangover.._

 It was dark outside. She was uncertain how late it was. More snow had befallen upon forest, so it betrayed the darkness with its' natural brightness. Midnight swim would have been nice but too bothersome during winter.

  _Ugh... Why is the lake on ice? Goddamn winter. I really  need to go swimming... Just **normal** swimming, not ice-swimming! I can't believe I miss autumn... At least You could swim. _

Maaike was feeling better. The fact that she could complain was usually a good sign: If she was able to complain, she would be able to handle it too. But nervousness stopped. Her house was still a mess.

Walking in front of a mirror, looking at herself. Was she getting older? Is she changing? 

_Not really. Why would I change? I've been this way since forever._

Maaike looked at the scar upon her face. Every year, it seemed to fade a little. Yet it all had a bit ironic tone to it all. She had been fighting dragons, not too long ago, but that didn't leave any visible scars. Instead her oldest scar was still there: Scar given my a madman, murderer of her kin. 

Her hair had darkened over the years, while her eyes had turned colder with her skin though her cheeks had a little inch more color. Maaike had changed.. But only from the outside.

 **Always** when stressful times caught up to her, she would see nightmares of her most traumatic moments. Some more realistic memories than others. There would also be a loss of rational thoughts. People might describe it as numbness but it was more.. Not madness, that much she knew... But it was in fact  _yearning_ _...._ for something. No one  can really tell what, but it was something to replace their own empty oblivion within themselves.

Maaike didn't know what it was. A  curse, sickness or her own vanity.

She frowned, looking herself directly in the eyes: Mirror lies to all. She had gained a new wrinkle, to add to her displeasure. Maaike hadn't realized how much of an adult woman she actually looked like, tho she didn't always act accordingly.

  _I look like a hopeless spinster. Stendarr's balls._

 

 

 A knock on her door awoke Maaike from her empty wonders. It was way past midnight, who could be there? She was reluctant to open it, hoping that whoever was there would leave. But they knocked again, each knock more intense.

_Fucking hell... I hate it when people try to make a social call in this unholy hour..._

There was familiarity to it all, Maaike wondered--

Then realizing who it could be she took few quick steps to her door. Closing her eyes, taking a deep sigh, she prepared to strike with a spell in her hand just in case it wouldn't be anyone pleasant after all.

 

 She pulled the door open slowly, not even hurrying to see who was there, but it couldn't be avoided. Maaike's gaze wouldn't be turned away from the tired, red-headed man in front of her.

Brynjolf looked tired, even without looking into his eyes or face, it was clear: He had dark circles around his eyes with a blank gaze as if he was half-asleep. He reeked of alcohol. Not more than usual of course (she had seen worse) but he seemed to allow this intoxication influence his behavior more potently than... well... ever before...

...with her, that is.

 _He must have been traveling, from the looks of it._ He indeed was like a wanderer from the looks of it.  _What the heck has he been up to?_

There was a deep and remote silence between them and when Maaike got enough of her bold courage to raise her head and look him _honestly_ into his eyes, she lost all that was left of her stubbornness: She couldn't form any words. 

She didn't need to.

Brynjolf's gaze was enough.

That  _dark,_ restless, almost  _old_ looking stare. So tired was he... so disappointed. It shamed her. She had  _missed_ him but now she wished she had gotten drunk.

 

Walking past her, into her house, Brynjolf now avoided looking at her in any possible way, and she could only look at his back. His stare was concentrated upon the messed up room: Looking around, searching and eating all details.. But not asking questions. Not at all.

Maaike didn't know what disturbed her the most: This sudden silence, or whatever he was pondering on.

 

The air was so heavy. There had been so many conversations between them for good and ill. Some so difficult that to this day, Maaike was unable comprehend her ability discuss them.

But this quiet was more powerful than any other conversation, or a hunt she had been engaged in... It spoke to her emotions. More helpless than Maaike's lost of control... or her nightmares. Only voice within the room came when she closed and locked the door and that seemed like a scream.

_Brynjolf is always willing to talk! His speech is always so understanding and accepting.. Is he really so strained...? Is he.... Is he... too drunk? Did something else happen? Is he alright? Why won't he look at me anymore_

Silence would have none of it. No trying of understanding... No acceptance... No feeling...

 

Maaike swallowed heavily, taking a step forward. Now she was only a inch away from him... Looking at his back. His stature implied things: Things that had happened. Brynjolf must have been in a shock.. Then confused. Furious.  _Enraged!_ Tired and....

 _Disappointed._ She swallowed, her face growing into a look of desperation.  _Please, for the love of Mara.. Of all Divines! Please. Give me... Something!_ She didn't know what to say. What words to use. But she knew what words were truthful.  _Genuine._

 

 Maaike's voice was shattering. "Bryn--"

" **Not.**   **Now.** "

 "....." empty spirit, "......Fine." 

 

Maaike walked to her door, calmly unlocking and opening it and then....

_Standing. Freezing. Empty-Empty-Empty. Fury. Only fulfillment. But... Only-- Numbness--_

A cold winter breeze woke her up from oblivion. It awoke her spirit, and her spirit woke up her nature.

 

Anger now grasping Maaike's consciousness, her body filling up with burning with a rush, she sharply turned to look at him (or, at least, his back).

" **Fuck you...** " she sneered with poisonous tone, gritting her teeth. Infuriated she stomped outside and slammed the door closed behind her-- There was a good chance that the doors hinges broke.

She didn't know if he bothered to look after her.

 

That night Brynjolf smashed her cabinet.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

  _"....You'll know, you'll know the Dragonorns come....~"_

 

More snow had fallen during the night, but it must have ended hours ago for there were no clouds up in the skies. Maaike could tell that winter's coldness was getting stronger for trees were frozen.. So white and beautiful. Sun was about to raise, though during winters it probably wouldn't stay there for long.

She didn't know what to make of last night. Ivarsted was the closest place with an inn, and (for some reason) Maaike's instincts told her to jump on Monica and make her way over there. She wasn't able to sleep properly, even after drinking. 

Maaike was leaning against a tree outside. Seven thousand steps were still there, mostly intact but some damage gad been done. 

 

It placed thoughts on her head. Things Maaike had been too distant to face. Brynjolf needed to know about it now, if she wished to maintain her relationship with him. It was inevitable. But how could she tell him, if she hasn't faced them herself?

_Ugh, why did I leave like that... And did he have to be a dick... UGH! It shouldn't be like this anymore, we should be adults.. Thieving adults, but still.._

Maaike shook her head. It didn't matter. The thing that mattered was how she was going to start: Not the talk with Brynjolf, but the chain of memories in her head. Something within her had always snapped whenever she had tried to think about it all.

 

Ulmer had hired her to do a job, but was not truthful about details. She had chosen to ignored it. Once she discovered what it was about, she immediately confronted him about the "flesh-market" he was overseeing. 

Then he had her and her team caught.  _Humiliated._ He raped her but not just that...

Maaike remembered how she had found her team. As if she had found her family however this time it was her fault, no matter what anyone would tell her. It wasn't some pathetic self- victimizing: Maaike's choices lead her friends to this. 

After that day of her loss, she had learned how much emotions can fuel magika: Her fire of destruction burned Ulmer's estate. Hopefully even the ashes were gone for there had been no time for burial, thus her friends had been burned there. It was a disgusting thought; Her friends ashed united with those of evil men.

_And like a coward, I fled here... Skyrim. Is fleeing, if I return to home? Maybe. Maybe not. I wished I'd be welcome here..._

 

Imperials caught her at the border and brought to Helgen to be executed. Had Alduin not interrupted that 'pleasant' gathering, Maaike might have indeed been beheaded; provided she hadn't gotten the opportunity to escape. 

_Poor bastard that Lokir of Rorikstead. Had he run to his right, he might have managed to escape. Alas, Imperial archers are not so poorly trained._

If Maaike hadn't been able to escape, she might have welcomed death. Not out of self-pity but because she hadn't cared much at that specific time. Everything felt meaningless, hollow and abandoned. How dramatic.

 

 But even after all her trials and misfortune, last of her pride hadn't allowed her to see the gloom and danger of it all, for because of it, she lost all sense and control. Part of being any sentient in Tamriel; any intelligent being. Ignore things long enough and they will go away. Not true of course, but it is meant to be a defense built inside them all.

It was over a year ago, half-way to high Hrothgar at the seven thousand steps, where she was forced to  _forget_  it all in order to survive. 

There she had her miscarriage.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Depression makes you ignore and forget a lot of things. It is part of coping. Not healthy tho. That's part of this chapter I suppose.
> 
> Good chance there is mistakes (grammar or otherwise) so I'll do my best to correct and repair them, as soon as I notice them. In the end, I am quite clumsy >_<
> 
> But enough of that.
> 
> Thank you again people. I am humbled that you'd continue to read this far ;3 I am appreciative for your feedback too. I am always trying to do better for you and still a long way to go but I wouldn't have improved without you guys. :)
> 
> I am *truly* grateful. Thank you.


	23. Truth you deserve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So last months have been a real mess.
> 
> My computer got broken, and the only times I got to write was in school's library, but then I got on a sick leave again and been running to doctor more than I care to count.
> 
> I tried to write with my phone but as it turned out, that piece of old crap can barely manage text messages, let alone going to internet, anymore.
> 
> Well after spending "nice" amount of money on repairs, my computer works again.  
> This is not a perfect chapter, because I had long gaps in-between writing it. But I do my best.
> 
> But one thing I gotta tell you. The support and words you have given me has gone beyond anything I was expecting. I consider myself an outcast, a person who can barely get out of the bed sometimes due to my health, and only way to show who I am is, well, art.
> 
> Telling stories is part of that I suppose.
> 
> Yeah yeah, overly dramatic, pretentious sounding crap, yeah? It might be. But for now... I just feel pride and comfort, Thanks to you guys :)
> 
> I know this comes a bit late, but I wish you the best possible year to come, for that what you have given me ;) 
> 
> For art is who I am, and you have shown support towards it. Maybe there is hope for me, and for so many others in the same place as me.

 

 

Maaike stood in front of her door. It might have been her home, but for once she didn't look forward to walking in. Her heart was pounding and heat was rising in her head: Almost as if she was child once more, walking into the cabin where her family laid dead.

_Pathetic. If you wallow like this, you indeed are the same foolish child._

Maaike knocked. It actually made her grin a bit. She had forgotten her key. Usually she had **all** her keys with her, as if it was impossible to leave them behind. So many keys! It was a wonder how she knew which was which, sense they looked alike.

She awaited, few breaths. No answer.  _Maybe he didn't hear._ She knocked again.  _Maybe he left?_  No answer. _If so, how the fuck am I gonna get in my **own** house? I made my locks almost impossible to open with just mere lockpicks! _

 

One more time she would knock, then she'd leave. Before her hand even touched the cold wood however, the door opened. 

Brynjolf looked like he'd been overrun by giants: his unshaved stubble longer than usual, hair a tangled mess and big dark shadows under his eyes... He didn't smell too much like alcohol, which suggested he might have washed up. But why did he look so ragged then? How much worse did he look before?

 

 

"Rough night?" She said as she walked past him into her house.

Maaike swore there was a little grin at the corner of his lips. "Guess you can put it that way."

 

 

Wooden cabinet had it's doors off it's hinges, but it was on it's place against the wall. Surface had cracks like a weakly frozen lake would have. Brynjolf must have pushed it and then some! Maaike didn't honestly mind. Better to get some steam off before an argument; That way people might avoid getting hurt. Anyhow, she chose not to dwell on it.

But heavy silence was yet again between them. Maaike's back was on him. What was he expecting to hear? What did he want to talk about? She realized this whole mess was so complicated that she didn't truly understand what issues were on his mind.

That she didn't tell him? Show trust? That must have been it but it didn't seem like him; He didn't seem the kind of guy to get mad if you didn't blabber all out, otherwise they hadn't carried on as far as they were now. 

It was frustration against her own chain of thought, that made her turn around to face her crimson thief.

 

"I-- I am not good at this. Okay that line sounds so used up. Still tho. I am not one to walk around the bushes, so I'll just... get to the point." She sighed and sat down on the side of her bed. Brushing some black hair aside from her face, Maaike let herself continue: "I get that you are pissed. I even get that you really have a good reason. But I don't know..."

He frowned. "You don't know what...?"

"....what those reasons are..... precisely... Have I let down your trust? Isn't that what most people focus on when they are involved? Or that someone else knew before you? Or this about your--- well our--- job? Ugh, for fucks sake, I don't know..." trailing off, she left it there. Whatever he'd say, he'd say it now.

 And he didn't look pleased.

 

Silence. Always that  _goddamn_ silence. 

Brynjolf was as if he had been struck. She had no clue, not what he expected... He sank down on a chair and rubbed his forehead with his fingers. Headache was bothering him.

"You know lass, at first, I wasn't aware of the reason either, " Maaike was not expecting to hear that "and yes; that does sound stupid because I was... very confused over all the frustrating anger. I had a clue though, I mean considering this whole tangle of clues in my head, I'd say I had _plenty_ of fucking clues-- But I didn't get it all straightened out." He grabbed a bottle of ale and took a long sip: Morning or not, people in a relationship would never be drinking too early.

He massaged his neck, it must have been strained.  "This is the scenario I was afraid would happen...Though I thought it might happen eventually."

 

 

_Scenario?! He- What- Fu-.... He tries to predict fights? The fuck?_

"Care to elaborate? Seriously, people keep forgetting to tell important details to those less advanced in the skills of interacting."

 

He smashed the ale bottle onto the table, loudly enough but not destroying the glass, making her jump. His angry-- No, frustrated--- look was directed at the fireplace.

"You are the goddamned  _one_ Thalmor were looking for! You might not get it, but those events were a real **shit-storm** to the Guild. Our member captured, tortured for information, let go by a stranger, then Thalmor looking for someone we hid and next thing we know, Vaults are filled with dead Thalmor agents and we sure the hell didn't kill 'em! Those events almost **ended** everything: The guild, profits, our lives..."

"It didn't happen Bryn."

"...Were it not for Maven Black-Briar's influence, we'd have been almost certainly butchered, as 'guilty by association' by those _**sick bastards.**_ " His voice did not hide the fact that he was aware of her good relations with Maven... In the end, Maven did offer her security...

 

But bringing this up, didn't exactly make her reassured... In fact, the fact that he had brought it up.... antagonized Maaike.

 

"AND SO WHAT?! I did what I  _had_ to do, believe me! I got bigger things going on than your Guild! Causing you trouble wasn't on my agenda, believe me, neither was it the greatest of my worries!" Maaike screamed. It wasn't planned, it was her temper. It was unfair to belittle Guild which had been his whole life, but for _fuck's sake_ she had an end of the world to stop! "Why the hell would it matter now anyways?! It's over!!"

Stomping on his feet he yelled: " **BECAUSE YOU CAN STILL FUCKING CAUSE THAT!** " Rest of his ale was thrown into the fireplace, alcohol feeding it's flames. "Thalmor find out we're hoarding the cause of their great embarrassment, the _one_ who  _ **stole**_ their information,  _ **killed**_ their agents and list goes on!" He breathed heavily, looking into her eyes. Their eyes connected every time they exchanged tough feelings. "Ironic, isn't it?"

"Ironic indeed."

Brynjolf had never been so angry with he: It ashamed her, and she kind of hated him for it.  _Never_ again would she be shamed by a man. But it was.... different. Like a sting, but not against everything part of her.... More as if it stung but just started hurting later... 

 

 

Maaike had never considered what chain of events would mean to other people. Mainly because her life had always been a bit... meaningless: She felt empty and broken, just doing things. But just how many lives had she change? No one could tell.

"Mercer has been on your ass ever since you joined. Now I found out this?! No fucking wonder! You had no intentions of even telling me, did you?"

"Well if _that's_ how it's gonna be like, then why am I still allowed to be here? Shouldn't you send me away? Huh? Tell me and I'll fucking do it! Oh and send Thalmor after me while you are at it, surely that get you off the hook!! Or is Mercer already on his way to get my head on a pike?!" 

_I can't believe this is coming out of my mouth.... I mean I can but it just makes it all worse. When did I become such a over reacting cunt?_

Talking before thinking is rarely a good idea.

He snickered sarcastically, uncharacteristically, "That's where we come to the _**fun**_   fucking part!!" He took few sharp strides towards her, face reddened with madness: "I  _didn't_ go to Mercer! No reports, no briefing, nothing! After all the resources and time we _**waisted**_  on just trying to attempt proving we were not behind the attack against Thalmor and trying to track  _you_ down. Yet, I didn't go to him!"

"How noble" she hissed with sarcasm.

"You are not getting it. No matter my own opinion, I should  **always** report to him, he will think what he thinks and I won't have a say. That's how it had worked for the last decade!" 

 

 

Maaike stood up, walking up to him with feelings mixed with anger and confusion. "You are talking about this shit, as if you are trying to explain something so much. Dibella's tits, you can get to the point! What part of this whole 'report' you've telling me is actually about what you are so flustered about???

You've never before get pissed from someone not telling you every goddamn detail of their _personal_ history, which by the way is fucking complicated in my case, so do me a favor and just.... Get is out of your system!!" 

 

He took yet another step forward, even closer. "No lass, you don't get to be mad at  _me_! Not today! If I feel like giving you a long fucking talk, I will do so!" Brynjolf was so close Maaike could feel his breath, his eyes aflame with a crippling storm of the sea. "This is my life for fuck's sake!! I don't care if our Thieves Guild was just an escape for _you_ , but it's  _everything_ to  _me_. 

I've broken the goddamn rules. You hear me? We've mixed our business and affairs together so fucking badly, I don't know where the hell we should go next! Those should always be kept separated, otherwise it creates such a fucking garbage pile... Which is where we are right now! For fuck's sake, even Julianos the holy god of Wisdom wouldn't know how to sort this out!!"

 

"You kidding me? You seriously fucking kidding? What, just 'graciously' choosing  _not  to_ reveal Mercer my past activities will get you **this**  worked up?" Her voice reeked of sarcasm: "Oh no, so fucking complicated! Well I am _sooooo_ sorry for such major inconvenience I've caused you and your precious career! Hell, the fact that Thalmor were high up on _my_ ass must  _pale_  in comparison!"

 

That clearly was the tick for Brynjolf: His strong arms grabbed her arms, the grip bruising her. She was held as if to prevent her from leaving. Maaike wasn't afraid of Brynjolf but seeing him so furious would be disturbing to anyone. 

"There is nothing 'just' about it, you _foolish_ woman!" He shook her a bit, as if to wake her up, grip tightening even more, his hoarse voice yelling: "Those people are dangerous, fanatics with too much power! I literally spend yesterday, riding to Windhelm and other useless-shit-holds of Skyrim just to make sure **your** , _'former'_  identity would be buried and dead! You don't even _begin,_  to understand how much it cost me.... and how much it still **can**!

More than integrity, 

 

 

Cold breeze, sliding down, like electricity. Breath failing for a moment, stuck like a heavy rock. Little needles sinking into human flesh.

That's how shock felt. 

 

_That's what he did?_

 

"Bryn..." Face soothed, voice cracking from all the sorrow.

 When Brynjolf saw Maaike's lips call out his name, it struck him how roughly he was holding her. Letting go but not backing down. He rubbed his neck, gaze averting hers. Heat was calm now. It was just them, a man and a woman.

Swallowing, clearing his throat he spoke carefully:

"I have a lot of contacts... People who owe me favors. Besides Maven Black-Briar, we don't exactly have a lot of people capable of dealing with the Thalmor. But rumors, evidence... All can be forged. Say wrong things to right ears and we've got.... well. An ending." Maaike looked confused so he sighed: "Basically, if things go as planned, Thalmor will think the one who assaulted their Embassy, which is you, has died. We did something similar with Etienne, few details changed of course. 

Perhaps I should have consulted you first but I ain't a fool; It is pretty clear you don't want to go back. So I went with my gut: For once, I didn't give a rat's ass  whatsoever, if I was acting unprofessionally, without rationalization... If going against my code can be rationalized."

"Code?"

"Yes yes..." Brynjolf waved his hand at her, dismissively. "Who would have thought. Unless you haven't noticed, I happen take a lot of pride in my work. So much so, that I have drafted my life around it. Whether you see it or not, I find honor in working for this family, for this system so carefully built. Why did you think I take the rule of 'no killing, no dealing in flesh' so seriously? It _is_ my life, it is who I  _am.._." A slight pause. " 'Till you came along that is."

She was taken aback. Her mind hadn't processed it all. "Why didn't... I mean you could have started with that..."

"I know. I thought it important though... To speak of explain the importance of it all...Besides, you asked." 

 

They stood there for awhile. It wasn't awkward nor comfortable. Brynjolf was awaiting Maaike's words. Purple lips, sweet and bitter, unable to form words.

 

 

She didn't know what she felt. They had argued too quickly. They could have been more subtle. Rage within her was unmasking itself: Dark void, endless oblivion, desperation.... It was there. Even when she had been with her old team, a hollow whisper followed her trails. It sucked the life out of everything. 

On the surface, she might have been lighthearted, stubborn, hot tempered, sarcastic... But shadow isn't some solid substance: No matter what shape it has, you cannot touch it. Sometimes that darkness took over. Anxiety, fear, emptiness, fury. At those times Maaike usually didn't remember what had happened.

 

Now?

 

A man and a woman: Their gazes locked upon each other. The Icy blue of her eyes was shattered; broken. 

 

For the first time in a long time, Maaike wasn't filled with either certainty or uncertainty: It was her _true_ self, her soul, that was freed through cracks of rampaging emptiness within, and the escape was beautiful! She felt her true, honest and sincere feelings as fade as they were... 

It was something she didn't was missing, until it came back. The fracture... Someone touched her so deeply, that it drew   _life_ , the truest of feelings, back to surface: Breaking out, causing the fracture, shattering sorrow, and thus she was _freed_.

In sadness, in broken pieces; A lost soul, searching it's release from it's hell of nothingness.

Knowledge of an elder scroll wasn't needed understand the feeling she held:

_**Yearning**._

Even with all the pain it carried, all failures it would brought up.....

Maaike had never felt more alive. 

 

 

 

Because of this man:

 

 

Brynjolf.

 

 

He strove for her. 

It wasn't because of some misguided charity, not some naive notion of chivalrousness, not some foolish choice to allow feelings take control, nor carefully calculated plan in order to make a profit.

 

This man followed his gut; his instincts. He didn't need to convince himself that she was worth it; It was natural to him.

 

That's why she broke free, reborn back to life. In all truth that there was, even among the shit she had pulled, Brynjolf's soul naturally picked her as someone of true worth, unconditionally. 

 

Air between them was heavy, but now more than ever she'd be willing to carry it.

 

But Maaike wasn't the only one who was moved.

 

 

_Beautiful. Crackles in her eyes like very icy snowflakes..._

Brynjolf read her eyes: So much pain under all that thunder. He had never gone this far in an affair, and he of all people was the last one to show "romantic" gestures. With her, those were not needed. Brynjolf was drawn to her; there were only few people able to hold their own with him, let a less  _interest_ him, but Maaike had a.... same level as he did.

Even with all their differences, there was mutual... belonging. Solid, and filled with life.

_Bittersweet grief._

And it crushed his very being, seeing that vulnerability. 

 

 

 

"Lass?" Brynjolf's voice was barely a whisper, heavy with stifled worry.

"Thank you. For everything... and I am sorry." Complex things to admit, let alone say. Yet there they were.

He nodded. "I admit, I haven't have many conversations like this. I could have been more tactful myself..."

 _His way of apologizing._  Maaike smiled. For the first time, this smile came through everything. No sarcasm to hide the pain, just a bit to spice things up. A joyous smile, from a sorrowful woman. 

But just as her smile had risen, it left. Brynjolf was a bit disappointed for he found her smile _e_ _ndearing_. But it was time to be serious. (As serious as Maaike was capable of being). 

 _Bryn deserves the truth. All of it._ The man who risked something he considered to be his life, for her, deserved the truth of her.  _And more. So much more. More than me in any life._

 

 

 

 A deep breath. Gathering thoughts. It is time.

 

 

"Have you heard of the Dragonborn? I mean we all have noticed Dragons returning and popping all around, but the one who dealt with worst of it, isn't exactly well-known person."

"Not much. Mostly rumors and those always differ. Why, you knew him, or.....?"

"Him? Ha, What a laugh! Is that how incorrect the rumors are? Not sure if I should be insulted or happy I didn't get caught."

 

Silence.

No one brakes eye-contact.

Completely still.

 Brynjolf blinks a few times; Maaike doesn't even take a single breath.

 

 Rubbing his forehead with his fingertips, Brynjolf sighed.

 

"You just love adding surprises to me pile don't you?"

 

 

 

***

 

 

 Adventures, no matter how many times retold, may still sound absurd; Even to the storyteller. When it comes to legends, prophecies and 'fates' however, and the whole book changes. Full truths were rarely documented or spoken. The ones that were, would be forgotten even by the Gods. 

 

 

 

"I want to tell you the whole story: All cards on the table, not just the ones you found out about."

 

 

 During her talk, few tears were shed, but they dried upon her cheeks almost immediately. Brynjolf helped brush them away and for once, Maaike didn't let her pride interfere; nothing stopped him from doing so.

 

 

_It all started with a simple gig, that one goddamn gig. "Basic" scouting around this 'drop point'  (chest under a rock to be more precise), near Bruma as I recall. It was shady, or  'least shadier than we usually went for:_

_Foxy, khajiit male (irony intended) in my mercenary company, had gotten it for us. It smelled weird from the start, even to him and he was the 'take any job with money in it' type so we tread carefully._

_But you know how it is... You don't ask questions, just get the job done: The payment was good for such a simple run. Suspicious yeah, but seemed worth it._

_More brutish times, you know?_

 

_Pft._

 

_We took down few idiots with eagerness for hidden 'treasures', few animals... Nothing big. I was curious of the chest's insides, and had we not been specificly commanded **not** to open it, I definitely would have. All in my mind was to 'get a simple pay from a simple job, nothing more'._

 

_Afterwards our employee wished to meet us. Apparently we had proven our discretion, quote: "professional integrity". Snobs._

_The boss turned out to be Ulmer, a 'merchant' competing over influence by using underworld resources and connections. There were enough corruption to go around so it wasn't difficult for him to keep operating and hiring mercenaries without raising questions. Many nobles did it too, he wasted his share._

_I personally didn't like to get involved in anything even close to politics, but it was solid business to be profited from. Besides, it's not like we were some "justice" warriors or whatever. Good chance all out previous employees had big bag of dirt on 'em. What difference would it make if he'd had more than usual amount?_

_Turns out, a big difference._

_Unfortunately thought didn't cross my mind. Ulmer was very pushy, but in a way, pretty damn charming. I saw eye to eye with him (back then) from time to time. I disliked seeing things black and white, even grey was way too simple at times. It was how people like Mjoll the Lioness viewed the world. She'd say how we deep down knew it was all wrong and we felt guilt. I didn't, still don't: Among so many shades, she was just another self-righteous fool, not seeing the shadow she herself was leaving behind her._

_It's not like we changed our opinions over a cup of tea, nothing like that. Back then, I really thought.... I don't know anymore._

 

_He paid us good coin, so I accepted his contract. My team backed me up in the end... They always did. But not before cautioning me thoroughly. The old man in particular (Junior we called him and again, irony intended)  had a generous mood of giving advises._

_"Ain't good to get money, when the shit on is not obvious enough you know."_

_Damn that old goat._

 

_We got jobs to protect different various of his property. Mines, houses, camps and even some random caves. Sometimes we got special 'delivery' jobs, escorting some carriages. Money kept flowing, and we were starting to get comfortable. We had just one strict command: Never "browse" his "goods". Ulmer or his top workmen reminded us of this before **every** gig._

_After we had become his regulars, Ulmer started to pay up in advance and his operation started to grow bigger. And Ulmer started to get closer._

_You must understand; Whilst I was aware of the darker side of criminal world (mainly from what Foxy , Junior and Monica had taught me) I was still kinda naive of those who truly ran things._

_When Ulmer made advances, I didn't think too much into them. I laughed at his flattery, listened his stories, and shared my own. Sure, I never forgot he was my boss, but I genuinely believed that there was something beyond it. Kinship perhaps._

_Then i started a casual relationship with Carl. A Redguard/nord warrior with only occasional rogue attidute. Someone who had connection to Alik'r warriors. I never did ask much. More to regret I guess. Ulmer started to get colder after that. He never asked how I entertained myself at nights, he didn't have to; It was fairly obvious to anyone with eyes that I bedded Carl.. Tho he felt more. Or at least wanted more. Whatever connection we had, faded away when Ulmer belittled Carl._

_When I questioned if he was bothered by Ulmer's attempts, or whenever I was worried over nothing, he'd tell me to "Let it be."_

 

_Ironically, I followed Carl's advice when I shouldn't have, and didn't follow it when I **definitely** should have._

 

_One night, we were given a surprise assignment out of blue. Nothing like we had done before. A direct attack to a mine occupied by his enemy. It was the first time Ulmer gave us an explanation, a background: His property had been invaded by a rival of his, and our success or failure to secure it before morning, would be vital._

_"Only secure it and kill everyone. No one or nothing is to be left alive... Or escape."_

_Something about the way he said it was out of place... Unnerving._

 

_By far, it was among the most difficult missions we had ever finished. (Note: This was before there was dragons swarming out of ass end of nowhere.)_

 

_It took few hours and by the time dawn broke, we were done. It was a basic mine, filled with occasional bone piles of some poor miners._

_One last room was left for me to check... An office I guess. One last straggler had crawled there, laying on the floor. Blood lost had made him delirious, and he swift from unconscious to awake every other minute._

 

_I might have killed him right there and then but...._

 

_The book._

 

_On this business desk was a lot of scrolls, maps, letters... but only one book. A business ledger._

 

_And it was opened..._

 

_That was the turning point. What **was** going on? What had we been doing for the last months?  Ulmer's words rang in my head: " **Only** secure it...." Why was I so intent on seeing it? I had resisted any temptations to check what his carriages, houses or mines contained. This wasn't any different._

_No different... Don't read it. I shouldn't._

_I read it._

 

 

_"You monster. We could have exposed him."_

 

_Those were the bitter last words of a man in the office._

 

 

_Ulmer was a slave trader and -broker._

 

_I dropped the book in horror and just... shrieked. I had helped him to **enslave** people. Men, women... Especially children... They were his main "focus". I hazily recall scouring the cabinets and chests.. There were Skooma, torture equipment and fucking nordic embalming tools... And some burnt iron to... mark. The fucking piles of bonus were no accidental miners bones... They were slaves! No wonder there were so many fucking different looking ones...._

_I threw up. The scale of it was... too big. Slavery isn't exactly in fashion nowadays. Yet the money he was making.... It was as big as it could be._

 

_A lot of shit I've managed to do in my life, but robbing someone else from something we all are born to have...... Made me sick. So fucking sick._

 

_Hell's sake... Turns out even I had morals..._

 

_Grabbing the book, I was about to run to my crew; we needed to get the hell out of there! No way I'd have any more part in it._

 

_Too late for that. Ulmer was awaiting me right at the door. My crew had let him and his bodyguards past them... I'll never forget that face; It was the last thing I saw before he hit me unconscious._

_That smug asshole knew. He fucking knew I was going to read that book. It's like he wanted an excuse to take me down.... And the others._

 

_So he did._

 

_It was the most horrifying night in my entire life. Even to this day, I have not lived anything even close to such shit. That night I saw him what he truly was:_

_A psychopath.... Sadist... Monster._

_He had captured and transported  us to his mansion... I was barely in my senses... But... I did hear their last words..._

 

_Monica cursed them, yelling she'd disembowel Ulmer if he didn't her sister, me, go. She used her last words to threaten those who wished me harm._

_Foxy was trying to convince Ulmer to let me go. It was funny how capable he was able to surprise me even after all the time we'd shared... Offering his life to save mine...._

_Junior had killed few men who had hold him down... Saying there is worse things than death to those who hurt his children. Damn that old man._

_Antonio... He was the only one of them who begged. Poor boy. To this day, I don't blame him._

_But Carl... He told me how he loved me._

 

 

_I shall never forgive myself for not... doing more._

 

 

_Beyond that.... They all stood behind me. None of them would stand with Ulmer and his slaving business._

 

_So he had his fun with us._

 

_I wasn't there to witness what he did to them, my family, but I was able to **hear** their suffering screams...  _

 

_While he himself tortured and raped me._

 

 

_Never said it out loud before. And beyond that, I won't repeat it. And  I will never revisit the specifics of what happened with anyone._

**_Never._ **

****

_Just....._

 

_Oh Stendarr's mercy.... Mara's love... I just prayed for it all to be over soon... For them... and me..._

 

 

 

 

_I don't remember much. Just that when I felt the tiniest straw of strength through the poison and skooma... I took it._

 

_Have you ever felt feeling so deep.... It destroys all emotions, all physical senses.... A freezing burn in your head, but not dominating or heavy; The feeling of aftermath. Something exploded and you are what is left. You will have unlimited union with what surrounds. No simple rush of adrenaline. Soul and mind escaping  me for they could never hold such  raw  burst of....._

_Emptiness that fulfilled.... Separation so great from people, it united me with life so I'd know death._

 

_It was an explosion of fire, ice and lightning... Yet none of it. Beyond and above. Not sure what. Water that could burn the field of wheat. Fire that could freeze even the greatest desserts. Storms that calmed even the most restless of seas. Ice to turn the hardest of stones to ashes._

 

_Only moments I care to remember is.... finding their bodies. Just like I did my family so long before as a child. I levered the place. Not sure if Ulmer died or survived....._

_But it is likely, if he did survive, he thinks I am dead. I should be dead. That's all I remember._

 

 

_Then came Skyrim. There are many adventures. But only few that affect me to this day._

 

_Skyrim was the place I run to. Not thinking... I just run. Past different terrain... No one, no creature, no hunger or thirst could stop me....._

_And was captured. Not by Ulmer , bandits or some creaturs, oh no._

 

_By Imperials, at the border. Funny isn't it? My undoing was not all the sins I had done, but the fact that some overeager officers thought my capture among the stormcloak idiots would earn them a promotion._

 

_Would you believe me, if I told you I was happy that happened?_

 

_I wanted to die. I lacked the courage to sink on my own blade. Either that, or I just.... lacked the will to do even that. I felt it like a blessing. Sweet release a breath away._

 

 _When my name was asked... I guess that's was the one time I said my name.._ _I wasn't on the list, yet they sentenced me to the block. Such is the 'honorable' lawful way of the Empire. Death might have been scary but.... I guess in that second I thought it would be a blessing._

 

_But when my head laid on the fresh blood of someone who had just been beheaded, I realized how warm the blood was. Stupid thing to focus on? Perhaps._

 

_But it made me think. What does death feel like?  People who wish to die, think it is a release from pain. But is it a release, if you are not there to feel the peace?_

 

_People always have their attention on "I wish this pain to end", just like I did. But when the time came, I was afraid. I guess that flickered hope, as tiny bit as it were. How could I know peace, if I was dead? No way I would go to Sovngarde. Eternity would remember my life as in... what I felt in that moment._

 

_Flicker of fire._

 

_No, not mine. A Dragon's._

 

_Yeah, I survived. A great black dragon, who turned out to be my greatest enemy in the future, was ironically my savior._

 

 

_From there, I did do a lot of adventures for sure. You aren't interest in the details. Only few, like I stated earlier, are worth mentioning at this time._

 

_Turned out I was knocked up. But I didn't have the time to figure out to do. I found out about it, when I lost it. A battle with a dragon, at the 7 000 steps was too much for my body. I never decided what to feel about it. For that tiny moment I was awake. Then my mind disappeared again._

 

 

_After the last battle.... When I killed Alduin, the world-eater... I was set from Sovngarde (literally) to the throat of the world. To the top. Really really top. I mean seriously._

 

_You couldn't go higher. I was where the legendary mountain ended. Above the never smelting snow. Dragons were grieving their brother. Shouting.... Ironically I had to walk among the world of the dead, to feel alive. For the first time since Ulmer.... I was back in body. And when I looked down.. I realized I was in power again._

 

_I felt the fracture in time, healing away. Shouts of Dragons were whispers of glory; Reminders of what once was immortal, was now no more._

 

_In a world of such fleeting and final things... When eternal source has met it's end.... It makes you wonder._

 

_I am fleeting. So is my soul. And yet I was the one left standing, all of Tamriel under me. Me, a mortal, one who had been away for this whole ordeal._

 

_I needed to face death and mortality, to be reborn._

 

 

_Can you imagine? At the very top of the world, higher than any dragon would be able to fly over, I smiled for the first time. I was back._

 

_I jumped; off the mountain. Not to die, but to take a leap. Wind caressing my cheeks. I swear it was a final goodbye from my crew, I might not forgive myself so fast.... But it it reassuring.. to feel one last touch...._

_I felt like I flied; just like a dragon._

_And I landed; alive and well. My feet is back on mortal grounds once more._

 

_It was a thrill. After that, I slowly but surely started walking towards Riften. I remember singing "Dragonborn comes" as a joke. Bitter laughter against myself. If Gods devised this for me..._

 

_Well..._

_At the very least.... they must have too much time on their hands...._

 

 

 

 ***

 

 

 

 

 Next long hours they spent in each other's arms, not saying a word.

Maaike fell asleep in his strong and steady frame.

But he, he didn't know why; There he yet was. Unwavering. Un-yielding.

 

Brynjolf cried, the bitter tears of sorrow which fell on her hair.. for the woman he now knew he loved.

 Falling in.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Good story isn't created by the writer; Good story tells itself." 
> 
> This is how I felt it would be. I have planned this part ever since I started writing this fic. But I am never 100% set on something. The story changes, sometimes in more ways than I'd want. 
> 
> This is as close, as I can get to how I think it would happen.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you, yet again. I am sorry for the wait >_< Hopefully you enjoyed this.


	24. Declaration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Result.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been reading old chapters, and noticed mistakes in both grammar and story. Trying to find and fix those but I am easily a bit... careless :P 
> 
> Point is, I found more of that same energy as I did when I started writing. I care for the story, and once more is my inspiration coming to me more naturally. Thus, it feels good to better this fic as a whole. It is satisfying.
> 
> It felt rewarding while I was writing this chapter. Honestly, it has been a struggle lately. But overall I am happy I haven't given up tho I might stumble. Meh. Nobody is perfect.

 

 

Evening.

It was evening, when she woke up. Not too weird, sleeping the day over. Thief's schedule wasn't exactly regular. Especially when it came to resting. It was quiet too. Brynjolf was not there to be found. Maybe he left to... get something? Knowing him.... Well. He'd come back soon enough. There were still too much stuff open in the air. Practical and personal.

After a while, Maaike to get her eyes open completely; They remained blurry tho, even after plenty of time. 

 

She indeed had told Brynjolf things. More than she ever had before. Even Sapphire didn't know. Not like that anyway: It was different to tell how things are, rather than telling how they  _feel_ or how they are within. That concept was weird, and Maaike didn't fully understand it yet.

While thoughts might have ran through her head, it strangely didn't strain her mind overly. Nor her soul. Guess there was some release in saying things out loud. Closure might be the best word.

 

 _Damn_ she had covered lot of ground.

 

Holy shit, right? She had just discovered a plot to take down Thieves Guild by an infamous traitor with issues towards Mercer and they din't even get  _around_ that. Like a giddy teenager, priorities were chosen.... weirdly.

Maaike frowned, getting up from the bed. He didn't even ask how her mission went. Not that there were any place to put that discussion. Too awkward, and so untactful. They'd have to go over it later. 

...As well as to clean up the mess. 

 

 

There were few knocks on the door, before tired looking Brynjolf walked in. Seemingly, from a simple stroll. 

_Speaking of the devil..._

 She was about to say something sarcastic to distract them from mammoth in the room but nothing came to her mind. Maaike just stood there, biting her lower lip. Brynjolf didn't make any attempts to step forward as the door closed behind him.

It wasn't awkward. Just heavy and... strange. New.

 

Maaike rubbed her temples with her fingertips, eyes closed as if she was concentrating.  _Ugh._ _Fucking hell. Dibella granted me tits, Akatosh gave me Dragon blood, but why the hell didn't Julianos gift me **some** understanding on social interactions? I swear, they are doing this on purpose._

 

When Maaike didn't find words, Brynjolf felt obliged to start.

 

"Speechless are we? I won't blame you. A lot of things were said." His speech was slow and off, but better than silence.

Finally she managed to open her eyes and let her arms fall to her sides. "Yeeeeeah. About that..."

He frowned. "You are uncomfortable."

"No. Well, yes. Or... Ugh. Just---  _new_ , you know?" Taking a deep breath, she calmed herself the best she could before continuing warily: "I have  _never,_ told anyone about these things... Not in the way I told you." Her voice was cracking while she spoke. 

 

"Brynjolf.... I hate being this weak. I hate speaking too much without really _saying_ anything. It hurts my head! I want it to be simpler. Yeah yeah, life doesn't work that way blaa blaa blaa." Maaike was trying to hide behind her non-caring and immature attitude but her eyes showed so much sadness, so many broken memories which almost made him flinch.

She kept going however, since she had found her voice: "I am so tired. So. Fucking. Tired. But back then? I was ready to die. I wanted to. Sometimes I felt like I was already dead.. Or buried alive, waiting and hoping for it just to end... Don't know which was worst. It was not courage that made me defeat Alduin. It was simply me not giving a shit. I half waited for some dragon just to put end to me. I wasn't so lucky."

He came closer, not speaking, but sadness practically dripping from him.

Maaike couldn't look at him, not so close, so she forced her eyes closed again. "I am  _so_ sorry... I should have told you. But--  _shit_." Tears welled up in her eyes, despite her resisting. Her breath was so shaky, her throat so sore... "... I don't want to return there. Not to that place, not to that feeling... And every time I think about it... I can feel  _his_ touch, hear  _their_ screams... And feel the..  _pain_.... Brynjolf, I must hide, behind sarcasm, behind simple mindedness, carelessness.... I won't feel, I _can't_  or I'll--"

 

 

He embraced her. Yet again. His right hand stroked her hair, feeling her locks between his fingers. Brynjolf couldn't handle her tears; They were so unlike her. With many women, he had been bothered by those emotional outbursts. Annoyed, actually. With Maaike however...

Brynjolf needed to hold her steady. He felt he must: It was his place and his need to be there for her. For she was strong, more alive than anyone else he had ever met; But that didn't make her immune... It might have actually made her more sensitive and vulnerable to things that actually matter... And some of that rubbed off on him too. She was the only one who made him care enough for that to happen.

Maaike didn't sob in his arms, in that firm grip. She didn't cry and scream. Her tears dropped one by one, so silently. And every single tear felt like a ton. To them both.

 

"We do talk too much at times, don't we?"

She nodded against his chest.

Brynjolf looked at the ceiling, to let out his own shaky breath, then returning back at her. "Maaike. Can you look at me?"

It took a little effort, a leap of faith, but she nodded again.

"Could you...?"

Maaike raised her head slowly until it was just their eyes, locked in a look. Brynjolf's palms moved on her shoulders, from there to her cheeks, reassuring and firm; Shaking from emotions of anger and passion but solid from certainty:

 

"I will **kill** the Divines themselves, to keep you  _free,_ my love." 

 

 Voice stern in it's purpose, trying not to explode from all of the passion; It was purest and truest thing either of them had ever heard... As if it was not even him speaking, but something more.. deep. Maaike stared, hearing him mean it. It was him! He who held her, he who was real, the only one who was true.

 

Maaike threw her arms around his neck, desperate to draw him closer, eyes stern with ice as well as fire. Now it was _her_ voice, _her_ gaze that was certain and sure, real and honest: Unwavering in it's meaning, sound shaking with need.

"I love you _idiot_ , you hear me?! I have fucking faced immortal beings, and will be  _damned_ before I let you get hurt by anything!" She hissed.

 

"Then let **that** be, **the only thing** , that will ever matter for us,  **before** ,  **above** and  _ **beyond** ,_ anything else!" Said Brynjolf before crashing his lips against her in a bruising kiss.

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

"We should start our conversations naked, if we are always gonna end up in bed anyway" said Brynjolf with a wolfish grin.

Maaike rolled her eyes at that, resting against his bare chest. "What a sharp wit. I am _sooo_ impressed. Truly." She was not.

He just chuckled at that. A lot of had been let out of their system and they handled it. In their own way. There was still much hurt, but now that they had declared their feelings for one another, there was comfort which was much stronger. Thus their usual way of chatting seemed appropriate again.

They deemed themselves ready for the outside world. Again, in their own way.

 

 Brynjolf played with her hair, twirling the stubborn lock between his fingers. "Hey, I never did ask: How your job went? I heard something vaguely, but not much. I'd like to hear your put on it." 

Maaike sighed. "Back to business huh? Oh don't give me that look, I don't mind."

 

She told him about what happened in Solitude with Gulum-Ei. He had the same look through it all, until Karliah came up. Then he stopped paying with her hair. It seemed to be a lot to process. He did ask whether or not she was sure, and Maaike would simply shrug, saying she saw no reason why not.

Brynjolf was clearly uneasy about it. He told her more about the betrayal and how he saw it as the most disgusting thing to do; Most dishonorable. Yet again he showed his rare ideals, and she found herself agreeing. Her loyalty to the Guild was becoming stronger by the day. Not just for him.

Why would someone betray their family?

There was something she couldn't put her finger on.... A gut feeling. Whilst she didn't mind someone hating Mercer, there was always more to the seeming story. She had learned how much details were hidden, when she met Paarthurnax.

 

Brynjolf insisted they'd give a report to Mercer together: He didn't want their leader to take his anger on Maaike. Feelings of disapproval and uncertainty towards him had grown, more so since the Golden glow incident. If there was going to be rant, they'd share it. 

Maaike teased him about his surprising display of chivalry, and he said something dirty return, to set the records straight about his character.

 

After awhile, they dressed up and ate; It had been while and they were hungry. Sex would do that. They almost had another round, but they knew it was time to get back to others. Personal issues had been handled (and they'd send someone to clean up her house). Time to go on.

 

Brynjolf opened the door for her, his roguish smile at it's best. "Lasses first."

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Mercer was in his house, looking through his plans. At first, he had been opened up to old grudge, eye to eye with the mirror of someone former, someone weaker and inferior; Something he once had been. His one misstep. His one loose end.

Brynjolf and Maaike had brought the news to him. Yet, even with the news and the fury it brought, even with the way those two had been standing before him, he couldn't help but smile.

He'd win. He was the full potential, one who has mastered more locks of power than any Daedra or God would dare to allow mortals. His power was unending; Limitless. Only game of power remained.

The dark elf, the defeated, had no power over him. Her fate, was sealed. He'd deal with this bitch himself.

Eyes looking, searching for details. Planning. Final piece to a puzzle of success; Yes, maybe it was all meant to be, so he would be able to take the last, masterful move to the very core power. To _control._  Yes, he'd turn this to his advantage. That much was clear.

 

_Snow veil Sanctum..._

 

Only one decision, one last detail to determine in this endgame, tho he already knew wha he most desired:

 

Brynjolf, or Maaike.

 

Which one he'd keep, which one would die?

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little bit shorter chapter, but it just felt right to post it like this :3 For the first time in a very long time, it just feels so good. I have hard time describing certain emotions, so I do it bit cryptically. 
> 
> Describing certain aspects of depression is little bit personal. And difficult to express.
> 
> If there are mistakes in grammar or story (and there always are) I'd appreciate if you'd notify me, if you feel like it. It is the only way for me to improve and I am open to discussions ^ ^ Although any comment ever given, random or not, has me hyped. I am pathetic, I know x).
> 
> Thank you for reading :)


	25. Clousure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I've received such nice and encouraging feedback that it is soooo great be back writing :3 Thank you all for your kind comments.
> 
> And this chapter was inspired by a certain transaction in my life, when you finally decide to close an old wound ^^ It might not be anything special or especially important, but I thought it worth mentioning.
> 
> Now, enough of that! Here is the new chapter.
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy! :)

 

 

 

_That.... did not go as I've imagined. Either he chickened out, 'cause Bryn was there, or... something else just as weird._

 

Mercer had taken the news, surprisingly.. "well", if that was even a thing. He seemed pissy when Brynjolf insisted staying with Maaike's when she gave her full report, and she fully expected Mercer to start ranting but his whole  demeanor changed when she spoke out the name 'Karliah': He seemed to be in a state of disbelief. At first that is. Soon enough he was brooding again.

Maaike told everything Gulum-Ei had told to her, including the 'where the end began' phrase. It made no sense to them, but Mercer seemed to understand what it meant. Instead of _sharing_ what he knew, he had them dismissed after calmly giving them instructions: They were to meet him next morning after he had "forged" a strategy. 

 

Then, he just went his way. Just like that. Maaike and Brynjolf just looked after him, not getting a move on. 

_Weird. Very fucking weird._

"Bryn, I hope you don't mind me saying so, but that was fucking _odd_. Challenging to put a finger on it though... I was expecting... Umm... Explosion?"

He shook his head. "Not gonna argue with that. Even _I_ wanted to smash something when you told me."

Maaike quipped her eyebrow. "But you figured smashing my cabinet earlier was enough?"

Brynjolf grinned sligtly. "Something like that. You aren't too mad, are you?"

"Eh. Been worse. But I wouldn't push my luck were I you."

"I appreciate the warning. Thank you." They laughed, forgetting circumstances for a minute. Reality came kicking back soon enough. Brynjolf rubbed the back of his neck. "Speaking of which, tread carefully. Mercer has always been unpredictable and this business... Well you saw how the guild was, when you joined. Waking up old ghosts is never pleasant. Especially this bitch."

 "I suppose I can relate... little bit. But this Karliah. You knew her right? Gallus too. Why did she do it?"

Brynjolf stared at her blankly, as if it took everything not to show his anger. He didn't need to think on it much. "Who knows. Maybe she thought she would gain a win, scheme herself to power and treasures. Honestly, I don't see how it makes a difference. That goes beyond me. Whatever the motivation however,  what she did was for herself. Murdering Gallus..." a slight pause, "... was the end. It isn't about honor or loyalty anymore. She needs to pay for her betrayal." 

Maaike wondered on that, while it was surprising to hear it from him: Brynjolf was practically embodiment of the Guilds ideals, and it didn't take this road often, and never lightly. But if no one else, she trusted his judgement. Nodding she said: "I suppose we'll be getting that chance, way things have been turning out lately, I figure."

"Well we can't let her slip through our fingers. Not again, or there'll be hell to pay."

 

Maaike frowned. Brynjolf wasn't able to tell what went on her head. Not that he usually could.

 

"Hey, you still in there lass?"

"What? Oh, sure. Sorry, I just spaced out for a minute. Don't pay any mind." Brynjolf cast her a doubting look, raising his eyebrow. She sighed, putting a hand on her waist. "Sweetheart, we had enough heart-to-heart to give people in Cyrodil a headache. And those softies like novelty. SO, that being said, let's save some mystery and sugar for later. Sounds good?"

He gave that wolfish grin of his. "If  you insist, though I highly doubt you'll ever run out."

"My, you suggesting I am soft?"

"I was about to go with 'mysterious' but hey, your words, not mine."

"Hilarious." Maaike said dryly, giving him a quizzing look. "Why are you grinning at me like that?"

"Why wouldn't I? You did call me sweetheart."

"Ugh. And they say women are difficult..." She waved her hand dismissively, turning around to hide a slight unintentional blush. "Screw this, let's just go get some drinks. That'll clear our heads!" 

Brynjolf chuckled. "Keeping facts always straight, as always. You go on ahead. I have business to conclude. We'll speak another time."

"Your loss. Oh well. I suppose I should chat up with Delvin and Vex anyways. I did join to do work. See ya later."

 

Maaike took her leave, walking to towards the Ragged Flagon. Bryn simply shook his head, amused.

 

When she entered the good old bar, many of the others were there; busy chatting jointly. 

Vekel saw her first, putting down his apron. "We heard you were chatting with boss. He passed us. Never seen Mercer looking the way he did. Say, you know what's up?" 

 _So much for drinking. Ugh._ Maaike wasn't certain if she should say anything. No reason to get ahead. "If you you wanna know so badly, ask Mercer. I ain't gonna put my hands into that bucket filled with shit."

"Yeeeeah, I'll pass. No way I'd risk my neck for a gossip."

"Thought so. How 'bout you just give me something I can drown in and get drunk?"

"Now that's more my area of expertise."

 

Others, Vex, Delvin, Tonilia etc. kept giving her weird gazes. It was understandable. Maaike had overheard before, how others were questioning Guild's situation, and this was the first real clue of what Mercer thought of it. Of course they wanted to know. Just like an armless man wishes to scratch their forehead. And a lot had changed when she came along: important jobs, more clients, new fences... Why wouldn't she know?

Maaike did her best just to sigh and to say nothing. When Vekel served her a bottle, she took a seat at the table near the body of water, away from others. When she did, others went on to their own business, since she was not giving them anything.

 

Except for Sapphire: She sat down next to her.

"Hello there. Back from your deep conversation. Hope it went well."

"Sapphire, for the last time, I am not talking about what Mercer---"

Sapphire shook her head, and spoke with a matter-of-fact voice: "No, I meant the chat you must have had with Brynjolf."

Maaike stopped abruptly. "Oh."

"You left the cistern in such a disarray, and this is the first time I met you since then. I was.. well not worried, I know you can handle yourself but you know..."

"Yeah. I get it. Thanks."

"... And from the looks of it, it's handled?"

Maaike smiled at that, nodding looking back at her. "Yeah. It's... decent now. Sure we had a little spat but it made the sex all the more sweeter."

Sapphire chuckled, little bit too sweetly for her usual stoic-self but they both let their images go when having 'girl talk'. "Oh  _really_ _?_ "

"Oooh, so much. Trust me. But in all seriousness..." She leaned her back against the chair, distant look in her eyes. She wasn't exactly certain how to phrase her thoughts on it, but as lame as it may have sounded like to her, Maaike wished to share her thoughts with Sapphire...

_So who cares?_

"Well, I told more than I originally planned. It was a spur of the moment you know? I needed to tell him how _none_ of it was my choice and blaa-shit-blaa. Bryn took it surprisingly well. He didn't pity me in some pathetic-annoying-way when he heard the whole story of.... The event you know I don't chat about. And by the time I get to dragons, he understands why I don't wish to visit those times. Yeah, I screwed up, he deserved to know sooner and from  _me_. Not by Etienne. Still, it was good as a whole."

 

Sapphire listened profoundly all way through, taking a gulping down her drink. "...You two are that serious, huh?"

"Afraid so. I didn't think I'd be one of these people but yeah..." She coughed, to clear her voice. "I uh, said I love him. And strangely enough, I know I meant it." 

_Sounds weirder when I say it out loud. Hell, I am becoming soft. For shits' sake._

Silence. Then Sapphire nudged Maaikes' side with her elbow. "I think it's great."

"Wait. You do?"

"Don't get soft!" She scoffed. "This is too close to being nauseatingly cute. I simply meant to say it's good to see someone I tolerate, more than any other idiot, actually content. Clearly you two are on the same page. Besides _you_ are the one who brought up love, not me." 

 

Maaike gave out a laugh, then looking down at her drink again.

Sapphire narrowed her eyes at her. "But there is something else on your mind, isn't there?"

"Damn it, what are you, a damn Moth priest?"

 "A what?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nevermind." Maaike sighed, rubbing her neck. "Look. I don't wanna make big deal out it..."

"...But?"

"..Buuut there is a question." She slowed and quieted her voice down to something of a whisper: "You don't have to answer, but I am gonna ask it. If those men who pillaged your family's farm and did those horrors to you, if they were alive... would you-- would you go after them?"

Question was the last Sapphire expected. She was taken aback by it. After a small spark of anger in her eyes, she seemed calm. Cautious, but calm. "Let me guess. You are planning something of a sort?"

"I-- no. Not yet. Something Bryn said made me wonder though."

"What was it?"

"About making someone pay. I won't get into details, not yet, but something from past has come back to bite us in the ass. And I wondered, of my own crap and... Is it worth it? I mean, my past keeps getting to me, and causing difficulties to so many. I've gotten past the whole 'I deserved it' thing. What happened in my past may have been my fault but I can live with that; I can realize my mistakes without being a goddamned martyr or... someone who takes blame from the real villain..."

"...Yet?"

"...Yet it all is is biting me in the ass! My whole plan was not to think about it, and just... let it be. I thought I could move on. But that's not how life goes for us, is it? I don't want to wait twenty years, only to wake up in regret and... and..."

Sighing, Sapphire ended Maaike's sentence for her. "...and without closure."

"Yeah. I guess so." She said solemnly.

 

Silence. They heard Vex bickering with poor Delvin, no one minding them. Until Sapphire poured herself a new drink. Taking a sip, she then leaned forward over the table. "I never got the chance to wonder upon it. I saw them, men who had hurt me horribly, and were nothing but worthless  _scum_ , literal  _thrash_ , with ability to do horrors to folk who didn't have it coming. To me, in that distant place of past, it was the only thing to do."

Maaike didn't want to say anything pitiful. It would just ruin the mood. "Oh. That's right... How stupid of me--"

Sapphire raised her hand, silencing Maaike. "Just- Let me finish."

"Um.. As you say. Go on then."

"...Now I can't pretend I get the whole picture, in the end you didn't tell me much details but from what I was able to gather... It is one thing to only have one option: Mine was to kill my attackers. To some, there is no way to get 'justice' so they must go on... But with you? We would be having very different conversation if you only had one option. 

But I think, with people like us, if there is any chance to hunt down those who wronged us in the most... _nightmarish_  ways... we should take it. Letting them be would be like ignoring a nail in your foot, bleeding and hurting. So answer to your question? Hell yes I'd hunt them down. I would make them suffer. Make them pay. Now those times might be a scar on my life forever, but rather that than the alternative: Bleeding wound... One which would never close.."

 

It was a conversation neither of expected to have. And Sapphire seemed to understand a lot. A huge lot. And why wouldn't she? Two of them were very similar in various of ways.

Maaike drank down rest of her bottle.

_Yes, maybe it is time._

After Karliah was dealt with, she'd deal with her old wound.

 

It was time to take care of Ulmer.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

Next time she med Brynjolf, she didn't tell him of her plans. Not yet. It was her turn to look out for him. Strong (also known as stubborn) men wouldn't speak of their toll so easily.

But she'd be there for him.

 

_For now, all else must be put aside._

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Very next evening, Mercer requested meeting with Brynjolf. It wasn't a surprise. Whilst Maaike had been taking care of many important jobs, this was about someone before her time and Mercer had made it clear how he distrusted her.

Although she had still offered to meet Mercer with him, he had insisted on going alone. It was one thing for a long-time member like him to accompany her, but completely different for her to follow him: he didn't want to undermine Mercers' authority to it's limits.

Mercer, like usual, had leaned over his papers.

 

Brynjolf straightened his back, and walked to his desk. Mercer didn't bother to even look at him. "You're here. Took you long enough."

There would be no use in snapping back at him, best thing would be just to play along. "Aye. I take it you have an idea of our next move?"

"Indeed. That phrase.. 'Where the end began'... There is only one place that could be. Ruin of Snow Veil Sanctum."

He was uncertain, then a suspicion hit him. "Wait. Is that where...."

"... where the bitch murdered Gallus and almost succeeded doing the same to me? Yes. That would be the place."

It was a lot to swallow. For twenty five years, the whole incident was left undiscussed. It was bad enough Karliah got away, but Gallus' got a death he didn't deserve. According to Mercer, he had been just... dumped somewhere. 

And now she got the nerve for this sort of irony?

Revolting.

"She must be reached before she manages to disappear again."

Finally Mercer raised his head to look at Brynjolf. "Indeed. There isn't time to waste so  **we** **'ll** be leaving as soon as you are ready."

Brynjolf wasn't sure what he had expected to hear. Maaike had been working on these jobs lately, and performed quite well. She had the skill. But  _he_ had the past. Karliah betrayed him as much as she did Mercer. Brynjolf found it pretty decent actually, that he'd be there when she'd be taken down. 

 

_Aye. Better keep this between those who is personally in it._

 

 "Very good. I'll meet you at the stabled at midnight."

 

"Don't be late." Mercer growled. "We have a woman to gut and yours will wait here for your return."

 

Brynjolf shot him with an agitated look, and speaking out with a deep and hoarse voice: "I'll have my daggers ready. I swear I won't allow Karliah to escape, even if it'll be the last thing I do."

 

Something changed in Mercers' look, Brynjolf couldn't put a finger on it. 

 

"I am counting on it."

 

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

 

"You sure you don't want me to tag along? Karliah or no, those ruins are filled with undead and shit. By Arkay, I hate those things."

"I take it you've run to those things more than once?"

"OH, trust me! I've run to those bastards more than dozen times and I swear, they are waiting around and refusing to die **just** to fuck with you. Thus, it is safe to say I know how to handle them."

"It is always handy to have all sorts of skills at your disposal."

"So there you go! You seem to have a way with Mercer, maybe he'd listen if you brought it up."

 

Brynjolf had come to meet Maaike at the Honeyside. He told her he was going to accompany their leader to these ruins to face off Karliah. He leaned against the wall near fireplace, shaking his head. 

"Even if he would, I'd rather not. Don't take it personally, but this should be done by those who are more _personally_ involved. Practicality isn't the factor here."

Maaike frowned at him, not really insulted but definitely not pleased. "Umm, I do recall being part of the guild. This is my family now too, remember?"

"I ain't saying you aren't. On the contrary, I was the one who welcomed you here after all... However, you weren't here when  _it_ happened. It was before your time. But it was during  _my_ time." He sighed, closing his eyes and rubbing his forehead to ease the feeling of tightness in his head. "I hope you can understand that."

 

Realizing she was just being difficult she let it go. All this stress and weight was taking a physical toll on him, and she didn't want to make it worse. In the end, he had been so understanding towards her.

_What am I doing? For fuck's sake, for all the shit I have preached about Ulmer, I should get how this is important for him and why he must have his say on it. Idiot brain._

Sighing, Maaike walked over to him to put her hand on his shoulder. "Okay." She said soothingly (as possible, soothing wasn't her strong suit). "Just be careful. I want you to come back in one piece." She also meant it.

_That wasn't so difficult, was it?_

Brynjolf's frown slowly turned into a smile which he directed at her, with a ridiculous pride. "Don't you worry. I am a full grown man you know."

_.....And I am already regretting it._

 Rolling her eyes, she took her hand away. "Worried? No. I just don't want to go there to haul your ass back home if you take too long."

"I do love it when you talk dirty to me."

"How do you even... No, nevermind. I don't want to know."

"Well, let me give you a clear reassurance" he chuckled lowly, hands on her jawline and pulling her into his embrace, kissing her goodbye.

 

Bodies intertwined, his stubble scratching her, a sensation which left her feeling raw. She ran her hands through the messy red hair of this man who made her feel complete, but left her wanting more of him. 

_Mystery and softness... More stored for later. Now that I think about it... I think I like it._

 Maaike closed her eyes. He'd better come back.

 

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Mercer drew his blade, looking at it's chillingly sharp edge. He ran his finger alongside it.

 

_Razor sharp indeed._

 

Midnight was closing in, silence creeping Riften stables.

 

_Brynjolf with his whore, stalling and vile-_

 

A cut. His finger bled a small trail of blood on snow. He looked at it, then letting out a growl. 

 

 _Since when was she that man's?_ _No_ , _there is no changing plans. I am right; deserving. Those fools. All they ever were._

 

Regardless of what how things were going to go down, he knew he wouldn't be taking another poison arrow near his heart. 

 

_Brynjolf, Brynjolf, Brynjolf..... Like Gallus, such an inconvenience on the path...._

_And like Gallus, with Karliah, within Snow Veil Sanctum._

_Irony can be most amusing._

 

Night sky was darkened by clouds, even the whiteness of snow wouldn't be able to bring light to this sort of night.

 

_Mine to bleed._

 

Later, it wouldn't be his blood on the snow. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, and for all the support. You guys are the best!! <3
> 
> Also, I'd recommend a Brynjolf mod, made by Elizabeth-Jackson-Hall, here is a link for it.
> 
> http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=912853611
> 
> By all means, check it out!


	26. When an end begins...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit hits the fan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, Summary says it all :D
> 
> It's good to write some more. Gotta say, I feel giddy. We are getting to the good parts.
> 
> I've received some wonderful comments, and I must thank you guys for all the support you have shown, even if I am not the most active writer.
> 
> I truly hope you'll enjoy this chapter.

 

 

First it was nothing. Skyrim was a big place with a fickle nature, thus traveling would take some time. A harsh winter was about to face it's peak, thus preventing any fast travel. After waiting out the first couple of days, there was no reason to worry. It was a natural amount of time, maybe they just got there due to weather?

Days passed. Then came the next day. And day after that. They should be arriving back soon?

And soon enough, yet again, another day ended. It's is not like they were on foot, going to Solitude, they got their stern mares with them and their destination wasn't even that far away from Windhelm. Even in a such harsh environment and who knows what among their path, they should be back 

Maaike was drowning herself in alcohol by the end of the week. Delvin soothed her in his old brooding way, reassuring their Brynjolf's return, but his wavering gave away his uncertainty. 

 

Maaike waved away Sapphire's worry for her, she requested for new assignments from Delvin (and he agreed, giving her assignments around Riften so she'd be around when Brynjolf came back) as his offerings were her favorite,  she showed face of a true independence for Vex, who (naturally) recommended such attitude... No need to cry, bitch and moan, right? 

 

Yet she needed to beckon Vekel for a new drink. 

 

Vipir bestowed more embarrassing stories of himself to his family; They all knew now what it was Mercer and Brynjolf went on to do (which had made good old Delvin swear), and all the long days of waiting needed something, anything, to distract them. 

Niruin made more of his stupid become-rich-quick-business ideas, just to annoy them. It was actually meant as a kind gesture, since it was a better distraction than constant shit-stench in the air. Maybe Maaike had misjudged him? Maybe a little. In the end, man was a still a pain.

Etienne stayed away. He must have felt quilty. Maaike felt bit bad for it too, for he had gone through his own hell so she wanted to apologize for her own behavior, but in the oblivion she currently lived in, he seemed such a distant matter.

Rune was not helpful. Cute, but not helpful.

Tonilia surprisingly asked her, every now and then, how she was doing. In her particular stoic way of course. Ignoring the sass, it could be considered sweet. (Tonilia would never admit it. For all she knew, she was above such.)

Thrynn had no idea what to say. He was simply pissed off. It was a surprise that he was clever enough to stay clear off Maaike however.

 

She did her jobs. She carried on. No sign of heart aching, no obvious sign of worry.

 

Yet she woke up with a hangover, and went to sleep only after getting drunk.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Maaike stroked Monica's mane. The beautiful mare was awake in that dark (relatively, snow always tended to brighten surroundings), cold midnight, keeping company to her human. Stables were rather quiet too, apart from the noises other horses made in their sleep. No guards outside the city. Just horses and random animals from forests sniffing around. 

This was the first night she hadn't opened up a bottle since Mercer and Brynjolf went to their mission. Taste of liquor remained upon her tongue. 

 

More than a week had gone by. _Long bloody week._ She let out few curses. It's not like she was frustrated, just impatient. That's what she thought to herself.

 

Maaike heard footsteps however: They weren't Brynjolf's. She didn't need to turn around to check. Despite Mercer's advise months ago, not to leave her back unsecured, this time she had no reason to worry.

"For a thief your stealth skills are lacking, Ric."

 "That's because I wasn't sneaking", Cynric scoffed, and kept going towards his own horse. Apples. Hard to forget that name. He wasn't even going to ask how she knew it was him. Surprising wit was kinda her deal. "How are you doing? Been a week since we've seen you sober."

 _'We' huh? They've talked about me._  Turning to look at the hooded man, she narrowed her eyes. "Me? I am fine. All sunshine and smiles."

"That so? Add 'avoiding direct questions' to that list then, while your at it. Or find out what those words are actually mean. Now, you gonna drop sarcasm and answer my question or not?"

Maaike gave out a small sigh, focus back on Monica. Too tired to actually play stubborn, at this time. Besides, if anyone, this man wouldn't make this into anything too dramatic.

Voice calm and small, almost distracted, she let her words slip. "I am.. tired. Adult woman, tired. And for what? Tsk! It is pathetic, yeah? Me being all woeful and worried... Here I always thought I was, how'd Vex put it, _above_ it." Words tasted bitter, more bitter than vomit. "You sure you want to get into this crap? This... drama? I'd wager you had enough of it in Whiterun."

Cynric quipped his eyebrow. From the look on his face, he hadn't forgotten how she bloodied the bard Mikael's mug. But there was more. Indifference perhaps?  It wasn't like he held prejudice upon his face, though it wasn't strictly compassion either. Was there a word for such a face?

 "I am here, you see that, I hope? That shit is done and buried." End of that. He folded his arms in front of him. "Look, you ain't the only one who's on edge over here. Everyone has gotten weary. Everyone! Even that bloody Dirge isn't dull enough to be oblivious. It's not just about one damn traitor out there... It is our boys after her. I've known both Mercer and Brynjolf for a long time. I know that if there's anyone who can handle whatever odds they are against, it's them. But at this point, it doesn't change much.  As long as they are away, we keep holding our breath."

"...And we sure have held our breath long enough..." Maaike murmured.

He solemnly nodded. "Exactly. Something's up. Which could mean an awful lot."

"So you're here for, what? To state the obvious, or to start some 'worried for our boys' group?" This time she slightly winced at her own sharp sarcasm. It was slightly unworthy of her. Quickly speaking up again; "Sorry. Didn't mean to be snide."

Cynric waved his hand, dismissing her apology. "Relax. Back to my intent..." Taking few steps towards her. ".... Pretending isn't really your style. Since we're all in the same boat, being fucking nervous and all you needn't... well... I mean it's not like you'd be whining, so you might as well let go of that... uhh... " He rubbed back of his neck, visibly uncomfortable, not used to this kinda talk.

 

Maaike fought back a slight grin at the man and his trying. "...a toughie front?" One great quality in this man, was how he talked to people: Everybody the same way. He didn't give a shit about gender, looks, age and such. He really didn't care about it. It's not like she would have minded if he did, but this was grand as well.

"I wasn't gonna use those words, but sure. They'll do." Cynric didn't fight back a grin of relief. Things didn't turn awkward.

 

She sighed slowly, voice smaller again. _Family  understands an' all that..._ "Okay. I get it."

"I'll take your word. Just lay off the drinks for now."

 _Now that was unexpected._ Conversation had taken a turn to something she wasn't waiting to hear. Though not completely a surprise.

If that wasn't his usual look, Maaike would think a frown was once more upon his face. His voice was.... uncharacteristically soft when he continued, face looking at the stars, knowing eyes:

"We've all gone down that path. Once or twice. It'll always cost more, than it pays. I won't ask you to trust me, just take my word on this one."

 

She had never noticed before. His eyes were almost as cold as hers; At least as blue. Memories lingered there. Her eyes studied him more closely. The man had been in prison, and was the type to work alone. There were certainly many stories, many mysteries that would tempt one to take up drinking. 

Now that she thought about, so did the rest of the Guild.

Of course they did. Underground and all... Say what you wanted of this life, it had great risk in it... Rewards, sure. But loss as well.

 

Maaike nodded, agreeing with him. No words needed to be added on that.

She had never really thought about.. this side of drinking. Sure, there were drunks everywhere. But on her case..? Her mind had refused to do so. Her younger- self might have started arguing about it, but she knew when she was outmatched.

 

"Hey Ric."

"Yeah?"

"You said you've known Bryn for a long time."

"I did."

"How long?"

He quipped his eyebrow at her slightly, looking away from the stars. "I joined the Guild short after he did. That tell you enough?"

It did.  _Holy hell_. Maaike felt slightly ashamed, despite herself. Again. Despite his words... These people have known Brynjolf for so much longer than she had... _Do I have the right to be that woeful 'damsel'? This was his real family. I should be the one comforting them, for fuck's sake!_

"I see." 

It was like he could read her mind, because he spoke out immediately:

"Hey. Relax. I said it once, not again. You'll need to get someone else to repeat it. But I'll say this much: We all care of what's going on. If you wouldn't care, it'd be worse. Besides...." he patted Monica, "... You two are more than rutting around."

 

 

Indeed they were. It was the truth.

 

 

Maaike smiled slightly. 

He nodded, and was about to leave, but she reached for him, to put her hand on his shoulder, stopping him.

"Thanks."

 A rare smile played on Cynric's lips. "Anytime."

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

_Hollow chambers, stone halls, broken ceiling. Light crackled through, little know finding it's way inside._

_No Dragon Priest slept there; No more. But a empty wisp, a promise of doom._

_Dark haired woman, that must have been her. All the other wisps were consumed by her. But not this one. Alduin._

 

_Yet she feared not. For it was empty whisper, of what it once was._

_Would there be a need for her? Or would more of her strength be devoured, by the past itself?_

 

_Every second, more of her warrior-shadow melted away, when the light of moon would come over._

_She had grown. Weaker. Every second would mend both light and dark together, making the distinction useless._

 

_The Raw power, raw soul, much more potent than any drink._

_Unpleasant, forced... Yet it was she who consumed._

 

_That consumption made her stronger... But more broken. Less human._

_That drinking made her more whole.... Yet weaker. Less human._

 

_Yet non was so true. Non so straight. Non so simple._

 

_It was easy to kill a monster. But it was not easy to kill one whose name you knew._

_Startled. There was power. But it was no longer dragon chambers._

_There was a soul, but non she could eat._

_Power of oblivion._

_Daedra._

 

_Soul, that controlled. Soul that had to control._

_Men, Mer. It didn't matter._

_The one who held power, was a dark one. Twisted fucker, yet straight in the mind._

 

_Just a peek forward and she could see their faces... There were more than one._

_Eyes, the same eyes._

 

_"Maaike, I know you are in there!!!"_

 

_***_

 

"Goddamnit, wake up!!" Yelled woman's voice.

 Loud knocking on the door woke Maaike from her slumber. 

_Sapphire. It had to be._

 

Grumbling, she lazily got up from her bed and headed towards the front door. She hadn't bothered to take off her Guild leathers when she went to sleep. Even without ale, she had managed to fall asleep relatively quickly. 

It was evening again...  _Damn, I must have overslept again. Those were some weird ass dreams... Again._

Opening the door, she saw blurry Sapphire with a furious look. Everything felt kinda numb, which meant her mind wasn't fully awake. 

_I gotta shake my head awake somehow..._

 

 

"Mercer's back."

_Well that did it._

"Wait, Mercer's back? _Just_ Mercer? What about Brynjolf?"

"Dunno. He didn't say anything. Boss just ordered you to meet him at his house", Sapphire responded quickly.

Maaike's skin crawled, and something in her stomach flipping over. In that fucked up blur of thoughts, she unintentionally thanked Cynric for his advice; Had she even the slightest of hangovers, she might have thrown up. There was no choice, but to swallow heavily, and put those thoughts on hold.

"I'll go now. I know where that is."

"Use the back door."

 

Nodding, Maaike hurried past her dear friend. No time. A million shreds of confused feelings passed, yet there was no hesitation in her steps. Something,  _something_ , happened. Nah, it couldn't be that bad could it? Maybe he was... injured. Maaike swore she reassured herself a thousand times, and forced a reality check right after every single time.

 

Prayer was not her way. But there was times when she'd question those who claim to forge destinies...

 

_Akatosh, have I not put your blood to use, in the way you intended?_

_Kynareth, have I not saved this world, isn't that why you granted us mortals the Voice?_

_Talos, have I not preserved everything you had built as a mortal?_

_Mara, why'd did you grant me a gift if you'd just take it away so soon?_

_Arkay, if you feel I have debts to pay, shouldn't you use my life to repayment?_

_Julianos, have I not grown?_

_Stendarr, if I won't have justice I deserve, have I not, at least, earned your mercy...?_

_Zenithar, have I not worked hard for everything I have?_

_Oh Dibella, forgive me for taking your name in vain so often..._

 

_You have played with me long enough...._

_I beg you, I have come so far, don't play this cruel joke on me now..._

 

She stopped in front of Mercer's door, and thus ended her plea. His bodyguard, what-ever-his-name-is, had stepped aside. Long breath, in and out.

 

_Fuck me._

 

Maaike opened the door, and stepped inside. Manor was in good shape, and luxurious (on Skyrim's standards). From what she'd heard, this too, was a gift from Black-Briar's. It would appear she wasn't the only one Maven gave gifts to. Shame. Not that she'd want Mercer getting more pissed.

Something weird was in the air though... Atmosphere was almost as strange as the one in her dream. She wasn't sure was it because she was still sleepy or was there something about the house.... Who knew. Probably just her imagination.

There were more bodyguards around as well. She had no idea he kept this many men at hand. None of them looked particularly significant, though they'd keep rabble out for sure.

"Boss is upstairs, waitin' for ye."

In no mood for snarky replies, she simply got upstairs. There were double-doors open, leading to a room. Two guards, here as well. They nodded to that rooms direction. 

 

No waver, no words, she walked into what appeared to be Mercer's bedroom. Lot of space, fireplace, food table, a bed with expensive sheets... True master bedroom. 

 

And it's master was  there.

 

His men closed the doors behind her, leaving her and Mercer alone.

Mercer was sitting in one of the two chairs near the fireplace, looking into dying flames with the most neutral look she had ever seen upon his face. His eyes were absent, dark shadows under them, but he obviously knew she was there. That was angering. Was he taunting, tormenting her, with his silence? Just to get a raise out of her, or something? Well this was one bloody time, she would not take it. Maaike made her right hand into fist, stress tingling in her blood, pulsing through her fingers. She could hear her own heartbeat.

At this moment, her fears lay elsewhere.

 

"Where is he?" Her voice and body was steady and strong, but everything _within_ her shook. "Where is Brynjolf?"

He didn't answer yet, only formed a frown. When he did talk, there was calmness there: "Sit."

"Is he alive?"

"You want to sit down for this."

Despite a sudden urge to sit, despite some weird- no-  _disturbing_  sensation in her mind; A temptation to carry out his words, she kept standing. Her want was too strong.

"Answer me...."

"I said sit-"

" **IS HE ALIVE**?!"

"No."

 

 

 

_"I will **kill**  the Divines themselves, to keep you free, my love." _

_"I love you, you idiot! You hear me?! I have fucking faced immortal beings, and will be damned before I let you get hurt by anything!"_

_"Then let **that**  be,  **the only thing** , that will ever matter for us,  **before** ,  **above** and  **beyond** , anything else!"_

 

 

 

Shattered.

The purpose... The path.... The hope.... The memory of _their_ love, of _their_ greatest confession...

Washed away.

Her mind was empty now.

 

 

 His eyes were on her now; Hard, unforgiving, forceful:

" **Sit. Down.** "

Her body obeyed the command, no longer caring where it came from or about the tone. Shock had yet to arrive. Now she too, looked into the dying flames. Fire and wood crackled. Comfort of the chair was not unwelcome. 

Mercer on the other hand, followed her every movement; from her eyes, breaths... Everything.

 

Maaike swallowed, only mustering such a small voice; Had she cared to think, she wouldn't have recognized as her own: "How did it happen." 

"Karliah shot him with an arrow, pierced his heart. Nothing I could've done to save him." He spoke calmly. "It was a trap."

"What about Karliah... What happened to her?"

"She got away."

"How?"

"Disappeared to thin air." When she shot him a short but angry side-glance, which he just frowned back at. "What, you think it'd be easy? How the hell do you think she's been avoiding us for all these years?"

 

There was silence for a moment. Maaike felt feeling returning to her toes. Just her toes.

 

"There is more", Mercer continued.

"Is there now..."

"Brynjolf stepped between me and the shot." Immediately her eyes shot up, looking directly into his, pure and unthinking shock within them. "He saved my life."

She could hear her heart again. Pulse much faster, heat building up in her head. "He saved you", she repeated.

"Yes." A pause. "I am sorry, I know you too were close."

 

Another pause, during Maaike continued staring at him blankly. Then she closed her eyes for a second, breathing with her mouth, voice shaking. 

 

"You. _You_....." She couldn't hold back: "... ** _FUCKING WHAT?!_** "

She shot up from the chair, keeping eyes closed; had she opened them, she would have destroyed everything she'd see. Thoughts, tangles, messes in her head were bubbling, and only thing left was to let them burst out; It wouldn't matter if they made sense or not:

"You're _SORRY?!_ And since WHEN you've given a **shit** about me? When have you not given shit to me and him for being... for just fucking being an 'us'!!??!??! _Ohohohoh_ , now you sure have fucking topped it. Hell!!"

She paced, hands moving with her words, focusing on keeping eyes tightly shut, it was too late, she couldn't and wouldn't keep it inside:

"You _**bastard**_ , you fucking greasy _pig_!!! No I take that back, a greasy pig would not attack me from behind on a good day, threaten me, and- and- You piece of 'living' _garbage,_ you don't have enough _**worth** _ to be a pig!!! 

Brynjolf, he... HE should have lived. _He_ kept the guild alive; He had such worth.... Such _great_ worth..... I would gladly lay my life for him, so would everyone else! But _you_? A vulture? YOU got away?  And _his_  murderer got away too???! **ISN'T THAT JUST FUCKING RICH**? The man everyone in the guild would rather have in charge, the man I owe everything, the man I'd give everything to, faces oblivion, whilst you, a cockroach, a man who isn't even half of who _he_ was, and that traitorous cunt walk free? Again?

Is that what Snow-veil sanctum is? A place where _**good**_ men go to die, and where only the men without _any_ worth can merge from? FUCKING HELL!

I know _your_ kind,  _Mercer Frey_ : A rat; _a skeever,_ nothing but a _pest_!! The kind that can do _nothing_ but be _**jealous**_ of those whom they can't compete with; Your kind only pale in comparison to men like Brynjolf... Which is what makes you nothing... And you will never be _anything_... OR HAVE ANYTHING. 

Nay, you have no  _ **idea**  _how close we were. And your 'sorry' means less than  ** _nothing_** to me."

 

 

That was so much she had screamed out of her chest.

She wasn't sure when her eyes had opened, but only now, after that rampage, she realized she was looking into his eyes directly. Breathing heavily and fast, everything felt so unreal. Her anger (any other feeling she might have felt was too huge for her to comprehend at this time) had blinded her yet again, for the first time in a... very long time. And that anger was used to insult her Guildmaster.

Had her mind worked properly, she would be damning herself.

 

Mercer was quiet, calm, expressionless, unmoved. Uncharacteristic amount. But something in his grey green eyes... snapped. A spark, an electric crackle. How can anyone be so still, yet have their very presence force submission upon those who even dare think about the air near it?

 

Flames in the fireplace were dead now, only ashes left.

 

He got up, chair creaking when he did, and turning his back at her, walking silently towards nearby table where she could hear him pouring wine into a goblet.

"Brynjolf, believe it or not, is a long time partner of mine; We've known each other for a long time. Hell of a lot longer than you two. I made him my second because I trusted him... And he didn't let me down. Damn good friend." His voice was distant, and she since she was unable to see his face, she just look at his shoulders, as they slumped slightly. For a moment. He drank down his wine in long gulp.

He proceeded to take another goblet, and fill that too.

"He used his last words to call out to you." 

Maaike didn't know what to say to that, so she stayed quiet and let him continue talking.

"I take it as his last wish.  Despite what you so _clearly_ believe, I do take care of what is valuable to me. Before, I might have not trusted you, thus I have been.... unworthy, that much is certain. But now?" He sighed, swiping away dirt from his forehead. "I won't slander my friends faith on you. Never again. From now on, you have my absolute protection, respect and trust."

 

She swallowed. His words crept into her very soul. _True, truth, he speaks truth... True and true yet....?_ What was wrong with her thoughts? They made no sense, as if they weren't hers. Every emotion was swarming in her mind right now though, finally becoming more and more real. Painful grief. But for some reason, it hadn't gripped her completely. Not yet. Why? Something... Was something wrong here?

Only thing she knew, was that her body believed his words. Her body? Did that make sense?

 

He turned around the goblet in hand, and walked towards her, until he was close enough for her to feel his breath: He smelled like sweat and alcohol.

"I formally give you his place. At my side. He would want that."

"I- I feel dizzy." She did. A lot.

"You look pale. Take this drink, it'll give you strength", he said and offered her a goblet.

She had taken what Cynric said to heart, so despite her temptation she shook her head. "I don't feel like drinking."

"Come now", he said his voice smoother than ever, sly as a snake, "...it'll lift your spirit".

She looked at the goblet, filled with the fine wine; It had such sensual fragrance... It called out to her. What was she thinking? Calling out to her? No. She had to refuse again. "Yes, as you say. W-wait.... n.... no. Thank you, but no... I can't--", she was slipping.

_I can't think..._

There. There was the spark in his eyes again. "Drink. It."

 

"I'll drink it." Her body moved on it's own, and before she knew it, the silky liquid was streaming down her throat. There was only slight bitterness there... Nutty flavor?

Nothing made sense. Only his words, his commands.

"It is a toast."

"Toast, yes." She replied like a puppet.  _What am I saying...? What is happening...? Toast, this is a toast!_

"...Toast for the future." 

_Toast for the future?!!! Brynjolf is dead... The one I could call my soul... This is disgusting... Real fucked up, right after a man was lost--_

"As you say."  _As he says. Wait. What?_

 

Her words nor her thoughts were no longer hers. They couldn't be. There was some disturbing, a creepy power here... Something she had felt in the air from the moment she had entered this house...

 

"Good girl. Release the goblet." 

She did. It dropped to the floor, clinking ever so slightly. Mercer grinned in triumph; Like she had passed some test. She tried to move, but nothing worked. She couldn't talk; not unless he wanted.

Her gut, her instincts roared in horror; She was in danger.

 

Mercer's grey green eyes were so intensively looking into her. Like a fucking _predator_ his eyes roamed over her body. His right hand rose up, and grabbed her chin.

"You know, as much as I found such attitude unbecoming, it does lit fires too..." His thump played with her lower lip, her mouth opening tiny bit. "I always found it entertaining how someone so... cold-eyed could possess such raw flames as soul." With that he leaned forward, brushing his nose into her hair, taking a long sniff, whilst his left hand groped her side.

 "You cursed me tonight, _lass_." He said, mocking her. "But we'll see to that mouth of yours now that you are  _mine_."

 

 

_No._

 

In that moment, whatever spell was over her, broke; Her will was a blade that pushed on and teared a crack on this dangerous hold; Through this crack, she could push, just enough to break free, to....

 

_Push._

 

**_"FUS!"_ **

 

 

It was what she could manage in that second, and it was enough: Mercer flew backwards, and fell onto the floor, grunting as he hit his back.

 

_"I shall **never** be bend to a will other than my own! For I am the mortal daughter of Akatosh, and don't you forget it!" _

Her words literally echoed; it was the raw power of dragon souls that made it so. This strength sparkled in her eyes, and she could feel that pure energy soaring within her once more.

 

Immediately her mind was clearer: There was a power here, which was of no divinity, no mere manipulations or of any common magic....

It only could be daedric.

She didn't know how long her mind would be her own, only that this danger was trying to creep back into her head: Regardless, she wouldn't stay to find out.

 

"You are making a mistake you cunt....!"

"Yeah well fuck you too!" Maaike snarled and run to the door, she could take down whatever bodyguards there were, not like she had a choice and--

 

The door was locked.

 

Those bastards must have locked it. She must break it, she must escape, but she felt weak---

 

 

"Mortal daughter of Akatosh huh... Shouting and all. You are the Dragonborn." He was getting up... And his smile was something only a villain could have. "I wondered why the daedric powers didn't work so easily on you. Unfortunately, as you have proved on many occasions, your body is still human. It won't be long now..."

"What the hell are y--"

 

The wine. 

 

"You will learn, that I leave no detail overlooked. I ensure all my victories."

Even if she wanted to, Maaike couldn't argue, for her eyes wouldn't stay open; her eyelids felt so heavy.... Her body was getting number. It must have been sleeping poison, or something worse...

 

_I... just... need.... to... get... the... door...._

 

When she fell to the ground, everything faded into fuzzy darkness.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeeeeep.
> 
> I never thought I'd make a point about alcoholism. I was not intensively planning on making one (when I started this fic) but over time, stories and ideas grow/evolve. I felt it was appropriate and something I should address in this situation, considering the stories circumstances. 
> 
> Not trying to rub it in yer face, don't worry ^ ^ 
> 
> The start of the chapter took me a while to write, but when I got around it, I really got into it. I couldn't stop. It was really... exciting. Weird, huh? :D
> 
> I know my style must be changing over time, but I hope it is improving and I am always happy if it finds a way to entertain you guys :3
> 
> Again, thanks for all the support, and all feedback is welcome <3


	27. Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well... Pain?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've received yet more encouraging comments, and it really feels the world to me :) I am sorry I've been so slow, and I tried to make this a bit longer chapter but some of it just didn't fit in so I'm leaving those bits to the next chapter (which I've already started making). It really took me forever to write certain bits of this chapter, as I was uncertain how to proceed. x_x But here it is.
> 
> Hopefully you'll enjoy this one :)

 

 

"Hmph. Hardly a challenge. But stay on your guard. Who knows what that bitch has in store for us. " 

"Aye," Brynjolf grunted, whilst pulling his blade out of a recently re-killed draugr, "...let's just hope these guys stay dead." 

Mercer barely gave out a scoff in response. 

 

Ancient chambers of Snow Veil Sanctum reeked of the undead, and there was a "feel" in the air, which Brynjolf could not quite place. His bones ached from it. This place was no cheery and safe tavern to get drunk in, that's for sure. 

It became clear from the camp and the horse outside, and the traps inside, that Karliah was indeed here. She wouldn't be able to escape them. He hoped.

What a relief. Some people might've chosen this to be a moment for self-pitying and fretting over potential failure. Bah. After all this time, their key to end  _this_ , was just in their reach! So close! They had a mission to complete. It was the only thought that mattered. 

Which didn't mean they should be careless. Both Brynjolf and Mercer knew this. 

As they walked down the dark hallways, red-haired scoundrel glanced over his shoulder, at the older Guild master. He had forgotten how good fighter this man was. Dangerous. Even though they haven't always agreed on how things should be run, it was good to see him when he was in action. Mercer didn't just send lackeys for this, and he wanted Brynjolf to tag along: It was personal to them both, so that's how they'd handle it. Respectable.

It might have been strange, when Mercer had him lead them, but it felt good to have this Guild master (a capable fighter) watching his back. Despite all, maybe the time they've known each other counted to him. Had it not been for the way he had treated Maaike... Trust issues because of Karliah or not, it was unacceptable.

Later Brynjolf would rethink the matter. Things would to change when this was over. It was inevitable. 

 

"We're on the right track. She's been through here as well. Let's get moving. I swear, I'll make her give us some answers," the older man growled.

"Ohh I intend to ask some of my own, Mercer. Trust me." 

They shared a short look. "I bet. But all of this is premature. Let's press---"

Their talk was interrupted when the walking, rotting corpses attacked them again. It was not a difficult match, but both of them ended up with a scowl of disgust on their faces. When you were able to  _taste_ the stench, you know it horrid it is.

"That damn poor Gallus. He didn't deserve to die in a place like this." Brynjolf murmured quietly, not wanting to wake up more enemies.

"He trusted the wrong people, and Karliah played on it. Even I didn't see it coming."

Brynjolf's scowl didn't leave. Intended or not, Mercer's words were indicating something more unpleasent.

 

Afterwards, Mercer would comment on the traps, giving them bitterly some nostalgic admiration, and both of them taunts whilst fighting, but not much else was exchanged between the two. What was there really to say, other than practical? They had only once discussed what happened at this place, twenty-five years ago, when the betrayal happened. After that it became a taboo.

 

After, what felt like a lifetime of traps and draugr, they ended up in front of an old, nordic door with some strange symbols. Brynjolf had heard of them, yet Mercer wasn't even bothered.

"Ah, it's one of the infamous Nordic puzzle doors. How quaint." He spoke, unimpressed. "Without the matching claw, they're normally impossible to open. And since I'm certain Karliah already did away with it, we're on our own. Fortunately, these doors have a weakness if you know how to exploit it."

"I take it you know how." Brynjolf lifted his eyebrow, watching as Mercer knelt closer to the door, apparently doing... whatever.

"Yes. Quite simple, really." It didn't take long, when miraculously, it opened.

Brynjolf didn't hide; He was impressed. "Smooth."

Mercer ignored him. "Karliah's close. I'm certain of it. Now let's get a move on." 

He nodded, and stepped foward. "Yes. Time to get some justice for Gallus. For the Guild."

Surprisingly, Mecer chuckled under his breath. He mumbled something, not loudly enough to be heard.

 

 

It took only few steps into to the next room, when shock ravaged his entire body. Just. Few. Steps:

Pain and blood poured from his chest, just below Brynjolf's colourbone. The pure surprise of it all, numbed him a bit, but nothing could hide this piercing ache. He stumbled forward, loosing his footing soon after and fell down, losing all ability to move. No muscle would heed his commands. Uncomfortable sting-like sensation all over him, his mind barely being able register it. _P_ _oison...? Ain't that a bitch..._ Eyesight was all but a blur: Brynjolf was barely able to make out what concurred around him, with all the haziness topped by darkness. Little by little he could make things out, but not completely.

Soon, there appeared a dark, slim figure (it was all he was able to make out.) If it was possible to freeze up even worse, that was the moment for it. Silent rage wouldn't escape him, oh no. Even from here, ice cold floor, it was obvious.

Karliah. 

Mercer had walked ahead, not giving any regard for his fallen colleague. He went to to confront her.

 

What came next, went beyond horror.

 

"Did you honestly think your arrow will reach me before my blade finds your heart?" The man said, tauntingly.

"Give me a reason to try", said a woman with barely controlled, yet quiet anger. She showed no fear, only venom.

"You're a clever girl, Karliah." Mercer mused half-heartedly. "Buying Goldenglow Estate and funding Honningbrew Meadery was inspired."

Karliah put her withdrew her bow, putting it back on her back. "To ensure an enemy's defeat, you must first undermine his allies.' It was the first lesson Gallus taught us." The last words were spoken bitterly.

Not shaken by her demeanor, the Guild-master spoke with a light heart: "You always were a quick study." 

"Not quick enough, otherwise Gallus would still be alive."

 

Darkness threatened to overtake him once more, but not because of the poison. His heartbeat slowed down, for what felt like an eternity: Brynjolf didn't need to ponder for something to click. His body realized what was going one quicker, than his mind. Karliah was the one sad, Karliah was the one accusing. 

Mercer was the one, who was unshaken.

 

"Gallus had his wealth and he had you. All he had to do was look the other way."

What was this? _Some sick kind of joke?_

"Did you forget the Oath we took as Nightingales?" She snarled at him, a question which Brynjolf did not understand. "Did you expect him to simply ignore your methods?"

"Enough of this mindless banter!" Mercer growled finally, drawing his weapon. Her words hit something in him, but it wasn't obvious, what it was. "Come, _Karliah_. It's time for you and Gallus to become reunited!"

Brynjolf felt his stomach was upside down, as the truth started to cripple his mind and soul.  _What had he done...._

_....was simply impossible._

Woman took a step back, quickly taking a small bottle into her hands, and sipping down it's content. Result was immediate: She became invisible. "I'm no fool, Mercer." Her voice was vicious, with nothing but full intent. "Crossing blades with you would be a death sentence. But I can promise you the next time we meet, it will be your undoing."

 

Silence, around the red-haired nord, and within. Only the noise of Mercer, sheathing his sword, echoed in these cold chambers. Empty, deliberated steps taken towards the paralyzed man, followed slowly. 

There was no uncertainty in this man. He was not offering a helping hand, no concern: not showing any hurry as if all were his, and he merely observed this situation, in good humor. Smugly, he seemed like this had gone almost perfectly. No bitterness, none at all. Brynjolf made an effort, intently looking into this other stranger's eyes, maybe for the first time ever.

For there was the real Mercer, staring, grinning right down at him, with a sense of victory.

 

"How interesting", said this slick, dark blond stranger. "It seems like Gallus's history has repeated itself. Quite literally." This was some ridicule; A web worse than one weaved by Mephala. Mercer's finger seemed to be aching for his sword, but something kept him at bay. The way he stayed standing, was meant as a point; this man would not lower himself. "Really Brynjolf. No whats? No whys? No how's? Though I suppose your reliability always had an end."

The nord barely made a sound from deep down his throat, mouth being unable to form words.

"'Tis as I thought then", man thought out loud, before continuing his facade. "Karliah has provided me with the means to get rid of you, and this ancient tomb becomes your final resting place. But," Mercer's grin didn't relent, "...do you know what intrigues me the most?" He still didn't make any effort to get nearer Brynjolf, but his words which he said next, did: "The fact that it was all thanks to  _her_. And you certainly played your own part as well." Judgement. Pure mockery. Blame. All in one. " Indeed, you were the one who brought her to me. And you really were right: This one is different."

 _Stop talking_. But it didn't end there. Why would it? It was obviously meant as a final humiliation. Guess when it came down to it, he was the type to drag it along and play these sick games. So much for his impatient practicality. Brynjolf couldn't help but slightly wonder, if Gallus had gone the same treatment.

"After all this time, none of you suspected a thing. It made everything all the more sweeter. And then _you,_ my 'friend', delivered me this ultimate 'asset' for which I _humbly_ thank you." His sarcasm was sharp a knife. "It was your place to do so after all. It will be interesting to see, when she realizes what is hers." 

 

So it is, this hostility, especially towards her, was the only truth this creep had shown of himself. With his inability to make out words, his sea-blue- eyes spoke volumes in it's stead: Raw promise of death, to this implication. There would be a storm, a hell to pay, his gaze promised. Even when he was down, the threat would not be silenced.

Brynjolf was would kill the other man.

A controlled, unworried chuckle, kind which Brynjolf had never heard of before, filled these hollow chambers.

"Now there it is! Empty as ever." This performance was coming to an end, for the Guild master seemed to be satisfied. He finally drew his blade, as part of his last act. 

This wouldn't be it. Stubbornly, Brynjolf struggled against it all. If the poison would give room for the slightest bit of control, he would be eager as hell to take it. 

"Farewell! I'll be sure to give Maaike your  _love_." Too late then.

 As Mercer's blade sunk into his flesh, for the first time in his adult life, Brynjolf set out a prayer. And not just for himself.

 

 

***

 

 

_Hum at the back of her head was overwhelming. All stability was gone, she was just hurling around, even if her body was still. Just like after drinking too much, getting so drunk that when you lay down, you could still feel yourself spinning. Funny how those things went. Only the most primal instincts were somewhat aware, though Maaike's mind did no register anything too precisely._

_Sick. Tired. It was her body that spoke in a rhythm, her heart playing the role of a drum. No realization whatsoever. Funny, too, how absent mind actually was, when it came to awareness. As if it had no purpose here._

_Unable to open her eyes, she tried to wiggle around, maybe raise a hand to rub her forehead. But her wrists were trapped together behind her. Dhamnnnith. Even her thoughts were feverish, barely able to work out correct words. She lay somewhere. A cold... stone floor. Yes. Ulmer's? No. That manor had been different. Right? Maybe she was still there. Where was the smoke? Oh right, she was the one who set the fires. In more ways than one, she supposed. Shhhhiit._ _Her jaw ached-- There was no way to breath through her mouth. Something was in the way._

_But what was that? Something weighted so heavily in her chest. So true... yet was it physical? Pain, the same kind which came when all the people she loved died. Her blood family, her chosen family, herself. But didn't she recover who she was? Brynjolf helped. Yet now he brought the grief. Even among pitch-black air, there is nothing darker could exist._

_So heavy. So painful. You can't lift it, so you wont even try. But it still keeps you down, ripping off your arms, your skin, your lungs, your heart... Little by little you are torn._

_Too difficult to think...._

  _For awhile, even her body drifted to the darkness, before footsteps echoed into her dream. Bit more clearly this time. As if whatever drug had held her, was washing off._

_What the hell now..._

_Something hard gripped Maaike's hair, not certain what was going on, but as the lock were twisting, pain coursing through her scalp, it came abundantly clear how reality was attempting to sneak inside once more. Her body wasn't against a cold stone anymore, but floating in air. Partially. Her knees felt weight. Words... someone spoke words. Each one was angrier, than the last._

_Could someone take off this veil of numbness?_

 

A slap across Maaike's face, ripped her out the last bit of dreams. Pain was a shock, and it made her eyes blink, to see better this assailant.

Who else? Mercer, looking directly at his prisoner, holding her on her knees by hair. Not gently either.  It took a second to register, why she was unable to speak and why her jaw hurt: _A gag._ Of course... To keep her from shouting, most definitely. And hands chained behind her, naturally. There was something strange about the cuffs though. Something magical. Now that she thought about it, she couldn't reach her own magicka. It was likely then, that these cuffs were enchanted, to reduce her use of magicka.

It also took a considerable amount of focus, to recall everything, feel every pain, but when it did come to her, a new clear sensation started taking over those icy eyes:

The only man she had ever admitted loving, was killed. She could barely grasp it, and when she did, she shattered. 

And Mercer had attempted to **twist** her grief, her weakened will, to his...  _perversions._ Brynjolf had followed Mercer, _oh if he had only known..._ She barely saw through it all, for her spirit was indeed too broken. Luckily not broken enough. He had made a big miscalculation: For grief can be twisted easily (which he had trusted upon) but what he didn't realize, was that he would turn the tides against himself.

Sorrow, not corrupted into despair and submission as he planned, but channeled into cold wrath. 

And _he_ was it's target. 

The thoughts of loss replaced any form of fear. Even the rational form. Disturbed by his... _advances_ , but not fearful. Rebellious, infuriated, disobedient stare was her answer. Whatever foul powers he possessed, she would not be  _his_. Now that she knew what he truly was, and so much made more sense: His outbursts and passes at her were all about contr- No- Domination. Completely and utterly. He couldn't manage it with her (not truly, she may have once nodded, to avoid trouble, but her spirit remained persistent) so he felt taunted.

That's why he had been so hostile from day one.

 

They were in some sort of cell or a tiny room... Stone walls, wooden door, and a 'bucket' at the corner. In case anyone needed to be here longer, no wonder. No windows, no natural lights. Wet. _Dank._ As in sewer dank. Also the smell kinda gave it away. How long has she been out of it?

The man himself, had stare of his own. Just as deadly, but hell lot more shrouded.

 

"Finally awake then." Came a husky murmur. Man was clearly filled with disdain for her lack of 'cooperation'. Just another thing, he couldn't control.

Maaike found herself on the floor once more, as her dark hair was released (or more accurately, she was thrown down once more). Indeed, she was dully awake, becoming even more aware of freezing coldness creeping from the stone beneath.  _Oh you better this gag doesn't go off.. I'll shout your ass off so quick you cant even imagine itching it._

"Seems like we've arrived at an impasse" he growled dangerously, pacing around, hovering near her, "and my patience has run out. Although that gag is making this  much easier."

Maaike's eyes followed his every step. _Oh you had some to begin with? Don't you fucking **dare** to lecture me about patience, you petty piece of shit... _ Whatever he tried to claim, would not be given. He could parade and mock, it wouldn't change anything.

 

 Strangely enough, man didn't speak up. Not yet. He was too calculated to not know what to say. Eventually he stopped in his steps. Maaike did her best to turn to her side, to watch him more intently.

 _That look. Were hell have I-_ It then hit her: He was evaluating her. Scaling. Just like Ulmer, right before he...

Mercer must have been able to tell from what she was thinking, from the little twitch she made. He didn't smile or grin, only a dark glee sparkled in his eyes.

 

"I see. Familiar situation for you, isn't it?" Man's right hand rose up as if he was deep in thought. What a charade. It did it's job though, as she was tensed. "Pathetic. You are might be fiery, but that won't be enough." Kneeling down, his hand brushed lock of hair out of her face, despite her attempt to twitch away. "Brynjolf is dead. Anything you have will crumble. Unless you play nice. Then I can make your future somewhat pleasant. Dragonborn would be most useful to me."

 Might as well throw oil into a fire. Nothing made rationally sense anymore. At least her fury was certain, and so strong it was, it made one numb. Silence was in the room once more. He waited her to make some gesture, she realized. If only a glare could kill. 

 _I will **never** again be made a slave against my will. Not to Ulmer, not to Divines. Not to fucking  petty little sewer rat. _ What Maaike did, was something that she couldn't have foreseen herself.

A laugh. The best that could be mustered with a gag. It rumbled against these walls. It was  _her_ turn to mock;  _her_ turn to belittle. She wasn't on the glimpse of surrender, just pretty damn amused and certain of this villain's pathetic efforts. And oh boy did it hit right home. Eyes with no mercy, no compassion. Gone was all the glee.  

 

"As you wish." He said with murder hanging in the air. Without any warning, he forced her lay completely on her back, straddling Maaike's chest. "I have an important matter to conclude. However..." he continued, pulling out his glass dagger, pressing it under her right eye, "...That doesn't mean I don't need to leave without giving you my mark."

Sharp enchanted dagger.  _Enchantments all around..._  Of course it was. Maaike's heart skipped a beat, it couldn't be helped. One could feel the dangerous lightning crackling against your skin. Once the blade sunk into her flesh however, no amount of self-restraint would protect her from jerking. It hurt! A lot. She had been scarred before but when it is done slowly, and with an enchantment what set every nerve alive, and set a painful pulse through your veins...

Blood poured out, as Mercer dragged the blade across her face; over her nose, until it was under the other eye. Some of the blood threatened to flow onto Maaike's eyes, as the disgusting blade cut flesh, meat. Mercer seemed to admire his handiwork, so damn pleased.

 

"Not so funny now is it?" It was his turn to chuckle humorless laugh. "Now you'll have a new scar to parade around. Although the old one is fading isn't it?" He trailed his index finger over the old wound, made by the insane skooma- man, who killed her family. One that crossed her face's right side. "Maybe we'll just-," Mercer's dagger was already pressing against it, voice coming out as barely contained growl, "-highlight it a bit!"

If only she could shout properly. Or just scream.

 

 

***

 

 

"No sign of her yet huh?"

Sapphire shook her head, taking a seat at the Delvin's table. "Not a peep."

_Tide goes in, tide goes out... If this ain't a bloody curse screwin' with us, then I don't know what 'is._

Delvin grunted, allowing Vekel to pour him some more ale. Like all previous drinks, this one was on the house. For now. Everyone might as well start drowning themselves, 'cause there ain't turning this to profit. Guild, if it could be called that, was torn apart. With Brynjolf-- well-- dead, Karliah loose, Mercer gone on his way again (leaving behind only some meager instructions, nothing to go about) and with Maaike   _only-the-_ _Eight-knows-where._   

So much bullshit, as the lass would've claimed. Just as they had began to rise, to actually mean something again, fate slapped them in the face, declaring it's all just a jest! Bah, triumph? No release for them. Not in this life. This operation might as well be abandoned, the blasted curse was too strong.

Tho that wasn't what Brynjolf would have wanted, was it?  _Goddamn_ , it just didn't sit right, not at all! That someone, who was merely kid  when he joined back in the day, when his beard not even grown properly, had now kicked the bucket before his time. Old Delvin wanted to kick himself. Partially because he had busted Brynjolf's arse too often, and partially for not doing it often enough. _Should have listened to the boy, while it all lasted. Maybe we'd gotten further. Gods damned it all._

Sapphire seemed be off her game as well. Tough as nails as the woman might be, bitter as hell too, only a blind fool couldn't tell she'd formed a kinship with their newest member. And Brynjolf had brought her to this guild so that also weighted something. The lass seemed to play with her dagger, turning it around, contemplating something.

 

"As soon as the gal has blown off the worst of it, she's sure to be back. Possibly drunk." Delvin reassured the blue eyed woman. He did tolerate the thief well enough, for reasons uncertain. There was always something great about the women here.

"How come Mercer had no clue, at all, which direction Maaike took off to? Or _anyone_?" Sapphire challenged him pretty loudly, clearly skeptical, intense blue looking directly at him, hands stilling. "She can discreet when she wants, but with Bryn's... Well, she would storm out, not sneak."

"What are you sayin'? That somethin' uncanny happened? Now don't go and be ridiculous. We've had a bad streak long enough, "

Her lips pressed into thin line. "We've both been in enough shadowy 'jobs' to know this is beyond irregular, even for her." She shook her head. "It's strange, that's all. I gathered you'd at least be a bit suspicious."

"She is not exactly wrong Delvin. Even I can see that." Vekel had been listening. Delvin hadn't expected him to make any sort of comment, however.

The older man frowned. He had to admit certain amount of... paranoia.

"And what are ye suggestin' then?"

Sapphire leaned forward, pressing elbows onto their table. "Wouldn't be first time we'd be left out of the loop..."

Bad idea. Even as a mere suggestion. "If you wanna ask Mercer, just don't." 

"Why not?"

Delvin blinked, as if it was obvious. "We've already gotten all we can get out of him. And he is not here."  _Luckily. He is anything but a safe man to pester._

"I noticed as much." She said, rolling her eyes at him. "How inconvenient for us, isn't it?"

 

Delvin was about to say something, to scold her implications, but Sapphire froze as if she'd seen a ghost. Vekel dropped a bottle. Something neither of them ever did. The woman's face disturbed him, as she was looking at something behind him. The old thief frowned and turned around to look at what could possibly cause this stir. His mind didn't register it at first. When it did, his jaw dropped and eyes widened.

"Shor's balls."

Brynjolf.

And with him, was Karliah.

 

 

***

 

 

Maaike didn't know how long it has passed. She spent a lot of time unconscious. Mercer had left her, after he had 'marked' her. He was also generous with his kicking and punching. Humiliating, awfully painful and bloody, but currently she had to focus on getting herself out of there. This was her only opening.

He had apparently given some 'guards' instructions how to handle her. They'd keep her drugged (either by poisoning her food and drinks, or just by using poisoned daggers), so she'd be out of most of the time, which was one of the reasons why time flied by. But they did need to feed her, and only way to do that, was to remove her gag and ensure she was somewhat awake. First she had tried to escape but with no magicka and her body so weak, she stood no chance. If she struggled, that meant less food, and more punches.

So she played along just enough, waiting for them to slip up, just a little bit. They were either very competent or just very afraid of Mercer (maybe both) so for a moment it seemed there wouldn't be any chances.

But then the tiniest opportunity presented itself: They had likely put the wrong amount of drugs in her, due to underestimating her. Maaike was able to move, to focus. This wouldn't be the first time she'd escaped impossible circumstances. Ulmer, Thalmor... Heck, she could do this. Just needed to get these cuffs off, so she'd be able to use magicka. She might even have a lockpick in her tunic somewhere, in a hidden pocket. Likely hidden somewhere in chest part of her guild leathers. No way she'd reach them from here, though, with her hands bound tightly behind her back.

_First step: Get your hands in front of you... If I can remove at least one of the cuffs of my wrist, that would be a big improvement..._

Maaike searched the cell- room- whatever. Only thing she found was rock, size of her fist. First off, she tried to break the chains with no luck. There was nothing else in the cell, and whilst she surely had time, she didn't have forever until those two guards came back.

She'd need to get creative.

If her hand was smaller or if there would be any form of oil or something, she might be able to 'slide' her hand off of it. Well she did have the rock... Maaike couldn't swallow properly, but she tried nonetheless. If her hand was, for example bit...  _bendier_ or such, it would be easier to get out of a cuff. It was her bones that were so restricting.

_Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck._

Her stomach turned, as she began to feel sick. For the first time she was glad that she was both gagged and had a bit drugs left in her blood. Both her voice and her pain would be muffled... 

 

_Oh fuck me. This is going to hurt._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for being so wonderful. :) I guess there is nothing more for now, so I'll just leave it at that.


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